Crap.
An open thread for personal stuff, continuing from here.
As usual for these threads: no trolls, no MRAs, no arguments.
Posted on August 10, 2014, in open thread. Bookmark the permalink. 714 Comments.
" ... a delirious and incisive page against misogyny." -- El Pais, via Google translate
WHTM, written and edited by David Futrelle, tracks and mocks the New Misogyny online, focusing especially on Men's Rights, Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW), and Pickup Artist (PUA) sites.
Contact me by clicking my head, above, or at futrelle [at] WeHuntedTheMammoth.com
Click here to donate to We Hunted the Mammoth. You don't need a Pay Pal account. The Pay Pal page will say you're donating to Man Boobz; that's just the old name of the blog,
 | humourlessRadicalFem… on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
 | Chris Wilson on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
| Chris Wilson on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
 | kittehserf - MOD on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
| humourlessRadicalFem… on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
| humourlessRadicalFem… on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
 | Bogdan Cvetkovic on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
| kittehserf - MOD on #GamerGate Manifesto Translate… |
| kittehserf - MOD on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
 | SittieKitty on #GamerGate Manifesto Translate… |
 | Kim on #GamerGate Manifesto Translate… |
 | thebewilderness on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
 | pallygirl on Men’s Rights Activists:… |
 | grumpyoldnurse on #GamerGate Manifesto Translate… |
| grumpyoldnurse on #GamerGate Manifesto Translate… |
Turns out The Nostalgia Critic is my emotional and intellectual doppleganger.
I will never be over my hatred of that remake.
Lisa from Six Feet Under!
Sooooo… just wondering if it’s normal to pass large amounts of retained menses (old, coagulated, brown, chunky blood and mucosal tissue) for two or three days prior to getting your period?
Yeah, I’m going to the doctor. Harrumph.
I have a soft spot in my heart for Nostalgia Critic, damselindistech. During the Homeless Year, he was one of the few things that could make me smile, so I’ll always be grateful to him for that.
RE: marinerachel
Happens with me all the time. Far as I know, nothing’s the matter with me. *shrug*
Also, does anyone else love long cats, cats with really long bodies that look like freaking weasels? It’s amazing if a long cat is lounging in your arms and lets you stretch it out like an accordion and you see exactly how long it’s spine actually is. Long cats are LONG! I think the suspended cat is duping me with it’s hind legs making it’s back look longer than it is in actuality. Wicked cute though!
I’ve always thought nostalgia critic was a fundamentally very decent dude too. Not the least bit pretentious in his delivery either. I like that.
Re: retained menses, I know they’re just leftovers from the previous cycle and all they indicate is my uterus not contracting to an extent sufficient to empty my uterus of menstrual material which is no big deal. It’s not unsafe. My body just rids it’s self of them at the end of the next cycle. Going to ask a GP just in case it’s an indicator of anything else though.
@marinerachel
My cat tiko tiko(who sadly passed away just after xmas) was long,he also had a very weasel like face, so much so that one of his many nick names was weasel nut.
So cute!
I love* the NC. He definitely has his problematic points, but I’ve definitely seen him improve on those points over time rather than get worse.
*And by love, I mean obsessively watch practically every episode in existence. Thrice.
My issue is a definite first world problem. I have finished all my classes and graduate on Aug 30th. I worked full-time at a job at least tangentially related to what I studied, but I need to find a new one to keep going.
So I am looking for work and absolutely hate it with a passion. had one interview so far and I think I botched it. Ahh well. I will keep casting the net and find a good match.
This is odd: doing a Google search of this site for “Lolita” turns up no results, but searching for “Humbert Humbert” does get some hits, with many of the pages actually having the word “Lolita” in them.
https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRCi8CUHejsLYhSBkLKfHUY07Lxmv78UBA6WPQp-9QZ2WF7NUpT
Here’s a picture of a very cat like weasel
[CN: abuse, trauma, anxiety]
I feel completely emotionally drained today. Last night I was not only triggered by memories of sexual and physical abuse, but I was also staying over at my dad’s place for the night. This morning, when I tried to leave the house, my dad was manipulating me constantly and berating me for wanting to leave “so soon”.
I’m finding it hard to concentrate on just about everything. All I want to do is sleep.
As pre-emptive brain bleach, especially for my Feminist Borg folks, I posted an old story of katz’s for writeathon; it won the bonus poll! You can read about the adventures of adorable cyborg animals here.
That’s poop to hear, Ally. I hope you get an opportunity to rest up and regain your strength.
LBT – I have similar feelings of “You were there for me” with MST3K. The hardest of times, I had that show to make me smile and keep me going.
@Ally– I’m sorry you’re dealing with so much. Hopefully some rest will recharge you.
@damselindetech– MST3k Is my absolute FAVORITE
I’m so jealous of USians who are able to go to live Cinematic Titanics, or Rifftrax, or whatever else the live shows are called.
Speaking of a live show…..I was at one a few years ago with my die-hard MST3K friend and we saw Plan 9 From Outer Space. It was awesome. I wish I could impart that experience on to you!
Just had a word with our vet. Fribs has been losing weight again since she went on the kidney diet (which, surprisingly, she likes). We’re going to try her on a mix of kitten food and kidney food. It’s tricky to keep the phosphorous levels down and get her enough protein to build her weight again.
We watched the Twilight Rifftraxx at me and hubby’s bachelor party with Smirnoff Ice.
Best. Bachelor party. EVER.
@damselindetech: Honestly, I think MST3K is awesome. TBH, I do kinda prefer the earlier episodes with Joel but Mike hosted some good episodes as well. And I liked ALL the bots, btw. =)
That poor cat is so obviously starving that it decided to hang itself in protest. Being a cat, it didn’t quite get the nuances right.
My wife gets annoyed with me because of my snoring in the morning. She doesn’t mind it herself, but it convinces the cat that we’re awake and that if it raises a racket outside the window long enough, we’ll let it in so it can eat.
I can’t even bring myself to speak out loud. I’m stuttering and saying everything too fast for anyone to understand. I tried going on a walk outside (because sleep didn’t do shit for me) and though I didn’t trip or fall down I think I easily could have done so since my gait was so unstable.
Hugs, nice thoughts, etc. are appreciated. I know trauma is behind all of this but I wish it would stop. I don’t feel like myself at all and I feel really unsafe and anxious for no reason.
@Ally, All the hugs!
@kittehs, Many pats for Fribs. Hope you get the diet tweaked just right!
At least cookies and milk seem to be helping. Surely no one can go wrong with cookies and milk unless they’re allergic to that stuff.
Thanks, cloudiah, let’s hope so!
I have a terrible problem. There Are No Piccies, but daughter now has 2, count them TWO, pug dogs.
The one she got first was an absolute pest, at least for me. Getting under my feet and all the rest of it – I thought he’d improve as he got older, he did, but not enough for my taste. He also drove the cat to distraction always wanting to “play” in his awkward, pestiferous way. He’d only calmed down a bit after they’d concentrated on training and obedience. But the conclusion was that his real problem was anxiety.
So they went back to the breeder and got a female dog who’s two years older than him and no longer being bred. (They restrict the number of pregnancies for the dog’s sake. I presume there are also vet issues and expenses that make it less desirable as well.) He’s no longer pestering the much more relaxed cat and he’s got a permanent doggy friend. The household is a much, much happier place for everyone.
Sorry. The problem was No Piccies.
(I changed what I wrote a bit and it doesn’t make sense any more.)
Glad to hear Pestiferous Pug has settled down, mildlymagnificent!
Mads was Teh Evil again this morning, shooting out the front door the minute I went to get the paper. I let her have a wander around the front yard – it’s fun watching her turn into mega-fluff cat while she’s out there – but then she had to do a bolt for the side fence and leap onto it. Luckily I caught her, but that was the end of that little expedition, and boy did I get some filthy looks for it!
opium4themasses – First world problem or not, job hunting suuuuuuuuuucks. Good luck!
Ally S – Kind thoughts! I’m sorry you’re dealing with all this, and I hope things get dramatically better for you soon.
A year or so ago, I went to a Cinematic Titanic live broadcast thing of Vincent Price’s “House on Haunted Hill.” Which I’m pretty sure was based on the same source material as “The Haunting” (1963) which was made into the abhorrent mess referred to in the first post on this thread. So it all ties together! Yay! Anyway, the Cinematic Titanic version was great.
Does Mads have a harness? I used to take mine to the park in London with one of those on, since it was the only way to let him outside without having him run into traffic, try to pick fights with dogs, and so on.
She does. I use it occasionally for taking her into the back yard. The little rat dashed out the other morning into the front, but was a good girl while she was out there with me. This morning, though – naughty!
Wish me luck.
For one week, I’m going to be the sole volunteer at my station, due to the other volunteers having vacations, work travel, or moving to a new job.
I’m just an EMT and scene support person, but there are entry qualified firefighters at the next station over who are only about a 12 minute travel time away from here. Still, it’s kind of uncool to know I’m going to be it for a little bit, especially because my paid job is also starting this week. So, I’m it, but I’m not going to be there 24/7.
It’s a little disconcerting.
We need more volunteers, darn it! Hoping to con one of the other station’s volunteers into becoming a live in out here.
“We have the comfier bunks! And you wouldn’t have to share a room anymore! Pretty please be one of our people?! Please?”
Best of luck, contrapangloss!
Mads is defintely channelling Basement Cat today. I’m trying out the Cat’s Paw knitting stitch, and what do I find? My knitting on the floor and a certain torbie someone thinking the name means she gets to knit it.
toujoursgai: To the best of my knowledge, The House on Haunted Hill is an original work. The good version of The Haunting is based on Shirley Jackson’s The Haunting of Hill House (which is very good reading); this site makes a pretty good case for the 1999 film being a shitty remake not of The Haunting but of the 1973 film The Legend of Hell House (a pretty good, if more lurid, haunted house film based on Richard Matheson’s Hell House– also worth reading).
@Ally: I hope the milk and cookies were nice. Rewarding yourself after a shitty time with people is always good – it means you have something to really look forward at the end.
@contrapangloss: gratz, they’ve clearly (and rightly so) got confidence in your abilities. What a pity it’s a volunteer job – I assume this as I don’t remember you writing that you were on pay – because you seem to be taking a real shine to it.
Me – last week of radiation. Breast was a mess over the weekend, registrar prescribed me stronger strength hydrocortisone cream to try to get the itchy bumps down, and it seems to be working, but back to it again with two days’ respite. Not sure how it’s going to go, the registrar, nurse, and radiation therapists are all saying it takes up to two weeks post treatment for all the *acute* side effects to show up. I’ve got some wound cream from the nurse this morning and disposable soft gauzes, so I can treat the delicate area. I tried to use dressings with the honey antibacterial cream, but my skin is really not taking to having any plaster stick on it at all. I’m also now resorting to using a ?silk cravat type thing down my bra, over the gauze to try to keep it in place, attract the friction, and also pull it up higher so that seat belts – for example – as well as bra straps don’t rub my itchy area.
Fuck cancer.
Sending good vibes to anyone who wants them.
I’m having a bad day. My anxiety levels/stress tolerance or whatever seem to work thusly: after a certain point, it takes longer and longer (and may not even be possible) to recharge to the point of basic function. So this year I’ve had to deal with getting a flat for myself and my partner and having to maintain it alone unexpectedly for 8 months … my partner finally moving in and promptly spending a summer’s worth of money in one month … my stepson’s mother dictating my schedule according to her whims at all times and berating and insulting me if I object … and then my stepson’s mother dabbling in borderline child abuse when it came to toilet training.
At this point, I think if I had a nice peaceful 12 months, my coping abilities would recharge. I had a mostly stress-free fortnight, but it isn’t good enough. Last night I felt tentatively able to get out and do some exercise, but the glow wore off really quickly when I discovered my allergy medications have been accidentally thrown out so I was up all night ill. When I finally got to sleep, it was at the cat’s breakfast time so she started climbing on my head and triggered me all over again. Then my partner, who was staying at his mum’s last night and today to give me time to do coursework (which is due on Friday and still has quite a way to go), texts me to tell me that yet again our schedule of having my stepson has changed, and we have him three extra days this week. I ask why, and he says actually this time it was his decision, because it is changing to weekdays at his mum’s/weekends with us soon (in theory) and he didn’t want to be travelling to and fro with him three times this week because of the change. In my opinion it would have made more sense to pick him up later this week and keep him through to Sunday, or keep it to the usual time this week and just swallow the extra train fare because I somehow don’t think it’s going to be much more expensive than three extra days of feeding and amusing him. But my opinion wasn’t consulted, I only live here…
Also after the rent and bills I’m down to my last couple hundred for the next month, and this life is just more expensive than that no matter how I try, not least because of the constant changing schedules, unexpected extra meals to make, unplanned train fares…
Three extra days wouldn’t seem like that much if they weren’t the n hundredth unplanned extra days. I’m considering going to stay at my mum’s this week so I can focus on getting my assignments in, but I’m embarrassed because it will be the second time I’ve bailed and gone to hide there to attempt to recharge and I just feel like it is so unnecessary. This massive amount of stress is not necessary. When mum had cancer, it was; when my mental illnesses were really bad, it was; when my parents split up, it was… I’m trying to get past and deal with a good few years of unavoidable stress, anxiety, and hardship and I just don’t need everyone adding to my plate for no good fucking reason.
mildlymagnificent, glad to hear your pug situation is fixed. Our pug only gets anxious around mealtime and walk time. He pretty much naps straight through the rest of the day if we let him.
Speaking of cats and pugs, there is a cat in our neighborhood that loves dogs, and comes out to greet everyone walking their dogs. When we’re out walking our pug Kirby, the cat comes running out to the street, meowing, and nuzzles Kirby. Then it starts rolling around on the ground and Kirby freaks out and starts running around it, whining. The cat doesn’t care at all. It just keeps on rolling. I have never met a more relaxed cat in my life.
@contrapangloss
These things go in spurts and fits. Everybody I know is in a recruiting mindset right now… more firefighters, more medical, more everybody!
Good luck!
K
No, honey. You are a rent and bill paying member of that household, and you should be respected as such and get a vote.
Lots of hugs to anyone who wants or needs them. Cancer, abusive family, and having your time and effort taken for granted are all rotten. :(
Yeah hellkell, that’s the worst of it. I am THE rent and bill paying member of the household, which was never the plan. That’s bad enough in and of itself without being left out of every decision concerning my money, my home, my shopping, my cleaning, my role as step-parent, my assignments, my schedule…
K, hugs. I don’t know what to say without sounding like I’m “shoulding” all over you, and I don’t want to do that. I will say you deserve better than this, and this is not the only relationship out there for you.
K, have you sat down and calmly told him how you feel? If he doesn’t care, could you be financially abused? There’s lots of good resources online.
I’m not telling you what to do, but my partner is financially controlling. Trust me, the longer you two live together the deeper in trouble you will get.
I’m not suggesting that you break up with him if you don’t want to, but I would think long and hard about combining your lives right now.
He’s more irresponsible/inconsiderate than controlling. If I point it all out, he doesn’t turn it back on me or deny it or anything, but neither have I seen lasting change. I’ll patiently explain how I need to know my schedule ahead of time, how being the only person keeping us all in the flat, fed, warm etc. is so draining on me and I just need some acknowledgement of it. And he will acknowledge it, and check in from time to time and take it into consideration for like, a couple of weeks. Then I just feel like he has forgotten. Nothing he does seems malicious, but just…he can’t/won’t see things from my perspective for more than short stretches, and explaining it over and over is draining in and of itself.
I could definitely do with some time off, but when there’s a toddler involved it’s difficult.
Hi,everybody, long time lurker here. I thought I’d introduce myself here, rather than on one of the regular posts.
I’m 22, law student from Germany. Currently, there are no furrinati overlords gracing me with their presence but my roommate has three awesome rats and a very furry spider so I hope that counts.
Just adding to the pile of hugs available for anyone who wants one!
And a welcome package for littlekatze!
Rats are definitely a member of the furrinati. I just noticed that I’ve typed the word furrinati into my phone enough times that it pops up in the dictionary and I can just select it instead of typing the whole thing out. :D
RE: K
Obviously not the same situation, but I’ve had to separate my finances from my roommates, food-wise, for the sake of my mental health. When we had joint finance, they’d blow through my share within a couple weeks, which would set me off, ED-wise. I can only imagine how much more stressful it would be if it was all freaking rent! D:
For those who had asked: Life has leveled out again and I’ve been able to update Ohai Uruk-hai (ohaiuruk-hai.tumblr.com) more regularly. :)
Many, many internet hugs to those who need them.
In case anyone needs a laugh, this exchange between 2 cats made me laugh really hard.
@cloudiah Thanks, I do love gift baskets!
Internet hugs and imaginary cookies for all who need them
even if you totally shouldn’t take cookies from strangers, even imaginary ones.The always delightful Fidelbogen is #2 commenter in the Aug 8th “Bust” article about how the MRM completely misunderstands feminism…great.
http://www.bust.com/mens-rights-movement-misunderstands-feminism.html
Me and office guy and the two coworkers/friends I invited all went to that lunch today. It was very pleasant, very friendly, I felt much better about it all.
Until we left.
And work friend says “Um, so… I didn’t want to tell you this earlier, because I knew this was already going to be an awkward lunch for you, but… he’s married. With a young child.”
WTF guy. WTF all over the place. I’ve now lost any and all concern that I may have accidentally flirted with you. What a giant fucking douche.
Maybe I misinterpreted and he wasn’t hitting on me in the first place? Maybe he mentioned he was married when I called him and I didn’t catch it because shit cell reception? But then why wouldn’t he be glad of a chance to have some coworkers we both know better come with us? JFC.
Viscaria, that is so Not Done. Douche is such an appropriate term – not needed and potentially harmful.
Hugs for all who want them!
Regarding phones and their dictionaries… I got a UTI and tried to text my partner about it, but the text kept failing to send, and I kept rewriting it. So my phone learned the phrase “I have a UTI”. I also wrote “I have a wedding” a lot at that time because I was busy going to weddings and therefore declining invitations to do other stuff via text. So now if I write “I have a” my phone prompts me with “wedding” and “UTI”.
@cloudiah I did need a laugh! And I had one :D
Hugs/cups of tea to anyone in need.
K, that sounds like a really high stress situation and I’m really sorry you have to deal with so much. Viscaria: I’m not sure what the full context here but sounds like you have a case of Douches Being Douches on your hands, and that sucks. WTF indeed.
For my part, I moved back to Ireland from Turkey last week after a few high stress weeks. Just the usual stuff: companies not wanting to pay teachers, bureaucracy making my life hell RE visa extensions etc, excessively hot weather, ex-lover getting violent resulting in me losing loads of friends because logic… I’m tired. So happy to be home and free!
I mean, I’m feeling a bit discombobulated. 3 years living abroad makes you feel a tad out of sync with everything. I’m dealing with this by knitting.
And I miss my cat! Really, he’s my flatmate’s cat but but but
Kitty!
Viscaria, if he apparently was so subtly about his being married you couldn’t tell, he doesn’t get to complain about you trying to subtly show your lack of interest.
What a dick.
Today is my weekly volunteer shift walking dogs at the shelter. Usually, I am very excited about it, but today it is supposed to be extremely hot, and about half of the more experienced members of our shift (read: the people who can handle the big, rambunctious, untrained dogs) will be out. Plus, my ability to handle the especially strong and wild ones is decreasing weekly (due to the increasing awkwardness conferred by pregnancy). Should be an…interesting…shift.
Hello, all!
Just dropped in for some shameless self-promotion. I’ve been working on a horror novel for a couple of years now, and just last week, I finally finished the process of self-publication. Hometown has gone live. Twenty years ago, something terrible happened in the small town of Belford, New York. Now the story can be told.
Available at Amazon (Kindle and print versions – yes, that was the minimum I was allowed to charge for the print version of this Stephen King-esque beast of a book), Barnes and Noble, and Smashwords. Hope y’all will stop by and check it out.
Way to go, Seraph! It looks great!
I got a lot done on my epic cross-stitch last week. I may actually get it done by 2017! (that is my for-real goal, 2017)
This is the pic I took when I finished a strip
And here’s one I took when I rolled it to start the next strip
2017 y’all!
Yay Seraph! Wooo!
Long post, hope that’s okay!
Belated hugs for you, Ally. I hope you’re doing a bit better now.
Pallygirl, fuck cancer. I’m sorry the serious side-effects of the radiation have already started appearing.
K, I’m sorry you are being undervalued as a parent, and as a member of the household. Please don’t feel ashamed of leaning on your support system — your mom, anyone else you’re turning to. That’s something you have every right to do.
Robert, NonServiam, LBT: Thanks! I’m almost relieved that he turned out to be an unrepentant dick, because now I feel no lingering worries or guilt.
Arete, best of luck tonight :-/ let us know how it goes!
Seraph, I look forward to checking out your book!
Policy of Madness, I know how incredibly slow a huge, complicated pattern like that can be. 2017 seems like a great goal to set for yourself. Looks beautiful!
Policy: nice. I started a much smaller cross-stitch (this one) but kind of stalled as I got interested in bookbinding instead.
It’s my birthday, for what it’s worth. I just hope my husband’s workday (he’s a mail carrier) doesn’t suck to much.
Also, hearing about Robin Williams’ death was not the birthday present I hoped for. Couldn’t someone more deserving like Rush or Scalia have cacked it instead?
Man, I literally just saw about Robin Williams. How sad. He was a figure from my childhood, and it sounds like he’s been having a rough go with mental illness of late. :( Aw man. Poor guy.
@Nequam
Happy birthday! That pattern is hilarious and awesome. It’s easy to get stalled in the boring sections, but fortunately cross-stitch will wait for you. There’s no expiry date.
@Viscaria
Thanks! Yes, it’s slow-going (I started it in January and I would estimate I am 25% done) but I take a picture literally every day I work in it at all, and at the end I plan to make a little video montage of how it came together.
I don’t really have anything constructive for everyone else who is having such hard times, because I never know what to say, except that you have all my sympathies.
Robin Williams just died? Holy shit.
I just heard that! Just horrible. He was so talented.