Creepy comment of the day: If men can’t get “the steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl,” naturally they’ll start shooting people.
Banana slug: A better role model for horny humans than bonobos?
Sometimes I hunt the misogyny, sometimes it wanders up right up to me and says hello.
Today’s post is an example of the latter. Below, a slightly edited comment that someone left for me this morning. It’s a response to a post of mine about a dreadful post on Return of Kings in which a fellow calling himself Billy Chubbs argued, with absolutely no evidence, that a recent high school shooter was driven to murder because of his “probable sexual frustration,” Chubbs went on to argue that young women are “selfish” because they don’t have sex with guys they’re not attracted to.
Anyway, my new commenter – posting under the name “whogoesthere?” – thinks that I and the other commenters here were being too hard on Chubbs’ “very good argument.” And so he deposited this giant rant, which in many ways is even scarier than Chubbs’ original.
He’s a tad verbose, so I’ve trimmed out some stuff that isn’t relevant to his general, er, thesis. And I’ve also taken the liberty of adding a few paragraph breaks and bolding a few of the best (i.e. worst) bits.
When men don’t get the women they want they turn to violence.
Not a good start here, because this just isn’t true. In this case, the phrase “not all men” is, for once, appropriate. Most men don’t get violent when they’re turned down.
This is established all over the animal kingdom and offers a good example about how it applies to humans, that snotty girls who keep their sexual treasures to all but a few males cause the remaining males to snap. …
Animals do all sorts of things that humans don’t do, and we can’t always learn from their behavior or assume that it relates to our own lives.
Or maybe the Evo Psych crew is just looking at the wrong animals. When banana slugs can’t find a partner to have sex with, they simply fertilize themselves. There’s a lesson here, I think, for the angry incels of the world: you can’t always get what you want, and when you can’t, sex with yourself is better than murder.
High school is a massively sexually charged winner take all environment. … Today’s high school is basically an ongoing audition for a porno video and the guys and girls who don’t make the cut can only sit at home and masturbate.
wat
It’s demeaning and hits a major blow to a person’s sexual identity to not be invited to frolic with the beautiful people.
Somehow most people, regardless of gender, manage to survive even if they’re not frolicking with Charlize Theron and/or Channing Tatum.
I’m sorry but almost no men go on wild shooting rampages if they have a beautiful female in their keep.
In their keep?! Also, no. Charles Manson was surrounded by beautiful young women. Yet he orchestrated multiple grisly murders.
The only guys that do so are bank robbers and thieves, generally guys at a later stage of life more fixated on money.
wat
Human beings naturally assess the amount of sex going around them and judge themselves in relationship to the amount and type of sex others are getting.
You know, you can’t actually tell how much and what kind of sex someone is having just by looking at them. Yes, there will always be people in the world having more sex with you. And some of these people are having sex with people you would probably like to have sex with. There are also people who are smarter than you, funnier than you, who can play chess or kickbox better than you, who have hundreds or thousands of times more money than you do.
That’s life. Life isn’t fair.
This makes sense because from a reproductive standpoint sex is coveted, and sex with beautiful thin, young women are the most coveted. Being the first to spoil these young women sexually is viewed reproductively as a guarantee of parentage, thus this is why males instinctively covet and burn with passion for these females.
Ah, yes, it was only a matter of time until the creepy pedo-justifying Evo Psych assfacts made their appearance. Not all men “burn with passion” in their pants for virginal high school girls.
This is why we have “morality” which is in its essence is a promise not to flaunt or indulge in sex moreso than the lowest man or woman in your tribe. This is what is meant when people say “morality went out the window.” They mean someone with more sexual prowess is openly indulging in sex and broadcasting it to stimulate the jealousy of the underclasses.
I’m pretty sure that’s not what people mean when they say “morality went out the window.”
This teen killed people cause he thought that beautiful girls were out of reach. The high school environment merely rubbed it in his face. Yes drugs to treat ADD might’ve eroded many of the impulse control functions in the teen, but the rage against the high school was still the gasoline.
[citation needed]
He might’ve had a picture or two taken with a girl next to him, but oftentimes those high school girls lie and simply eat up the male’s offerings without granting sexual access, but grant it to a random stud.
How dare young women choose who to have sex with, and who not to!
I’m not saying the girl he killed deserved it, it’s only that when you are in that frame of mind you cannot tell who is having more sex than others and you simply fill in the gaps with rage.
Wait, so if she had turned him down he would have been justified in killing her?
The beautiful girl simply represented everything that the teen couldn’t get. The steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.
Yeah, I think you’re confusing high school with porn again. His rampage lasted roughly a minute and a half. He shot her because she was there.
All the other theories posted on this site seem comical, self-righteous and weirdly off-point. It’s like you’re assessing the situation as an asexual senior citizen or righteous prude.
Not a lot of “prudes” here. Just people who find the “women need to have sex with ‘nice guys’ or these ‘nice gys’ will kill you all” to be a somewhat problematic argument.
Generally men want sex with young thin beauties who validate their existence.
Some men do. But most men, among those who are sexually attracted to women, aren’t as neurotically fixated on this small slice of the female demographic – women in their teens and early twenties who are somehow both virginal and sexually “wild” – as manosphere men seem to be. And most people don’t base their entire self-worth on whether or not they’re having sex with beautiful people.
Some men prefer women older than them. Some like women who are fat. Plenty of men don’t fixate on a particular physical type and are attracted to all sorts of different women. Believe it or not, whogoesthere, there are lots of men who are more interested in what’s in a woman’s head than they are in whether or not she matches up with some particular checklist of physical attributes.
If society removes all of the social pathways to attaining such a beauty, such as making prostitution illegal, increasing shame for men who seek sex, rewarding females and males called manginas who identify and mock the sex seekers and so on… this will lead to depression in men and all of the behaviors surrounding it, including shootings. Sounds pretty much like a logical line of reasoning to me.
And that’s the problem. It’s not actually a logical line of reasoning at all. It’s more like a sort of blackmail.
Men don’t kill women because they can’t have “the steady love and wild sex of a valuable young girl.” Sometimes men kill women because they feel entitled to have sex with these “valuable young girls” and become bitter and enraged when they can’t find a “valuable young girl” who agrees with them on this particular point.
It’s not the lack of “sexual access” that’s the problem. It’s the notion that your desire for “sexual access” means more than the right of that person to say “no.” It’s the notion that society has done you wrong because you can’t (at least at the moment) get laid. It’s the idea that your desire to have sex with a particular kind of woman somehow trumps the right of other people to live.
I mean, what the fucking fuck.
Oh, by the way, there’s no evidence that the shooter in question – Karl Halverson Pierson – was motivated by sexual frustration. His intended target was the school librarian, who is also the school’s debate coach. Pierson was obsessed with debate, and had some sort of grudge against the coach.
Posted on June 22, 2014, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. 2,219 Comments.
Okay, I think LBT has the right idea, and we need to bleach the thread with tales of actual beautiful, consensual romance.
I met my husband seven years ago in college. Socially inept, with serious mental illness and an abusive radfem for a mother, he was drifting heavily into MRA territory and had dated only a couple of times, mostly with extremely unstable women. He was not a virgin, but that was because an asshole friend had pressured him into having sex with a Quebecois sex worker.
I was a ridiculously shy wannabe libertarian who hadn’t realized yet that her wealthy mother’s Ayn Rand bullshit didn’t work in the real world. My last and only boyfriend had dumped me, and I learned much later that the poor guy was gay and our friends had pressured him into dating. Despite being conventionally attractive and geeky in high school, and actually pursuing many guys with the pure intention of casual sex, I had never been successful. I also had a blog where I whined about my loneliness and asked for tips on how to get men to see me as femme enough to date.
We met in a writer’s group. I was sharing my terrible poetry and he was sharing his novel, which was a lot better than my poetry but was still pretty unpolished. We started talking online, both of us frantically having another AIM window asking for advice. The advice I got? Let things come, don’t worry about it. The advice he got? She’s a person, treat her like one.
Our conversations were amazing. I didn’t feel lonely, and he didn’t feel alienated. We talked about Byzantine dietary habits and the RNA origin theories and how Janeway was a terrible captain. We made the same logical leaps. Our first date, we watched DS9 and Firefly and told stories over Indian food. He asked permission before he touched my breasts for the first time, and we had a long conversation before we started having sex.
Within two years, his disability came to a head and I found myself caring for him while he struggled with OCD, PTSD, dissociation and depression. Then my depression spiraled out of control and despite his own struggles, he cared for me to make sure I passed Organic Chemistry. Just last year he helped me through a total meltdown.
Now, seven years later, he wears nail polish and glitter and schools people who judge him on feminist theory. He’s slowly converted all his old friends away from MRAdom, and low and behold they also entered healthy, stable relationships once they did (except one, who still struggles with misogyny, but he’s also neurologically atypical). He’s healthy again, strong, and working full time supervising and counseling mentally retarded pedophiles who lack the judgement to understand the difference between children and adults. I’m making friends, but content with being an introvert; comfortable in my own skin, liberal as can be and finally understand that the creepy rape scenes that prevented me from doing the essay my mom wanted me to write for the Ayn Rand Foundation were indicative of a broader problem with her philosophy.
He wanted a fiery young Scandinavian artiste to marry and I wanted a tall strong stranger to fuck. Neither of us got what we wanted. We got what we needed. And we couldn’t be happier.
@cassandrakitty – katz is right, herbs are usually pretty easy if you have groundspace/a nice roomy pot and a sunny place for it to set. I’m somewhere humid, so I have to keep mine pretty well pruned or they get weird funguses and wilts. In drier areas, that usually isn’t a problem, or so I’m told :).
@katz – I’ve killed rosemary before, too. Mine was especially weird. For months it was this monster of a miniature tree, and I was doing things like grilling fish just so I could use armloads of rosemary for it’s bed on the grill. Then overnight, it turned brown and died. For what’s supposed to be a hearty shrub, they can sure be finicky.
Kotaku is a fucking mess. A few months ago there was a story about a woman in the gaming industry who’d been sexually harassed by a man in the industry.
Of course a significant portion of the commenters were blaming her for the harassment because she didn’t reject him firmly enough. It was explained to them that she might have been humiliated and frightened and hoped if she ignored him he would stop. But they didn’t care. He was just flirting (by drunkenly texting her graphic details about he would give her oral)! How would he know that was inappropriate behavior at work!
Then about a week or two later a creepy FB stalker was harassing a Hot Topic employee. She lost her patience because ignoring him and being vague wasn’t working. So she clearly, firmly and a little brutally rejected him and for some reason the screen caps went viral.
Do you suppose the commenters praised her for taking their previous advice and putting him down clearly and firmly?
Haha. No. Of course not. They whined about how mean he is. Couldn’t she let him down gently? What if he’s autistic? How snobby of her! Of course stalking a stranger who you saw at Hot Topic isn’t creepy!
And gamers wonder why they have reputations as neckbearded fedora wearing losers.
My neighbors have like 3 giant rosemary bushes that are left over from a previous family’s herb garden and never receive any care and just keep growing. I’m jelly but I just go over there every month or so and hack off a branch.
Ben is the best nerd character ever. Everything he does immediately reminds me of someone I know.
Kotaku is pretty much everything that’s wrong with geek culture wrapped up with a bow made of racism.
You’re right that greater sexual liberation is the key, but we don’t need to legalize prostitution to get there. We just need to liberate these particular men, by encouraging them to loosen their inhibitions about having sex with each other.
I’m envisioning a kind of swinger’s club, but with an extra rule saying that you’re banned from the club if you refuse anyone else’s request to have safe sex. Some applicants will be happy to find that they’re able to have sex as often as they want. Other applicants will consider the by-laws and realize that they’re voluntarily celibate, which will give them a real self-esteem boost while they wait for the right partner to come along.
Anyway, what’s the plan? Is this something that you’d be interested in setting up, or should we wait to see if anyone else volunteers to organize it?
“What you call “nww misogyny” is actually “waking up.” The younger generation is waking up.”
Oh, look, morning rage boner.
Honestly, they could have sex with women now, if a. they were nicer to the women they want to date and b. they were a bit more realistic about which women might want to date them.
@Flying Mouse: Oh, gosh, let’s not even get into this. I mean, we wasted at least a third of the semester in my Intermediate Microeconomics class trying to hammer out that particular riddle. Is the Keynesian school correct, and government stimulus is needed to provide every Nice Guy with a HB8 or greater until the economy corrects itself? Or should we rely on supply side theory and give massive tax breaks to all the feeemales until they deign to give male consumers the sex they so fervently desire?
I was all for adopting the Swedish Model until they explained to me that it didn’t involve, you know, stunning blondes from Stockholm. Instead they were proposing importing inferior quality girlfriends from, ugh, Australia.
Now, is this your seventh [expletive] anniversary, or the seventh anniversary of your fucking? :-P
Much original.
So convince.
Wow.
But the trilbies! So classy!
LBT – I’m throwing confetti here (metaphorically) and have a great big smile (literally). I loved reading your and Mac’s history!
Also: your anniversary is on my birthday. Sweet!
::sends kittehserf internet fist-bump::
Look at us expressing physical preferences for our partners, like the evil feminists that we are. And after racnad explicitly reminded us to check ourselves further back in the thread. Tsk-tsk. I guess that means we’re too far gone.
Wow, this thread went into overdrive while I slept.
@undfreeland:
You’re *so close* to getting it that it hurts my brain to see you miss.
They also fail to understand that women can’t help who they’re attracted to, anymore than they can help being attracted to their female friends.
Seriously, *so close*. So let me summarise: women and men can both be attracted to whoever the hell they like, for whatever reason they like; then, ?????, then ALL WOMEN ONLY GO FOR ALPHAS AND POOR LOW STATUS GUYS DON’T GET ANY.
It seems like you’ve bought into a lot of the PUA community’s ideas here, so let me just take a moment to refute some base assumptions:
+ “high status” and “low status” are bullshit.
+ women and men are indeed entitled to find anybody attractive for whatever reason. But finding someone attractive, in and of itself, doesn’t entitle you to jack shit.
+ violence, manipulation and abuse are wrong. Not “wrong, but…”. Not “But I tried not manipulating women and it didn’t work!”. Wrong. Fullstop.
+ I promise you, your wang will not fall off if you don’t get laid.
Okay, now we can talk. I have an acquaintance who dabbled in the very shallowest end of the PUA pool, in the part that doesn’t treat women as inferior beings (I know, fellow Mammotheers, I was also shocked that there was such a thing!). Rather than relying on “tricks” like negging, or overanalysing every interaction to see if you’re sticking to the playbook correctly, his group simply talked about things like making an effort with your appearance. Like putting your best self forward (not hiding your less attractive qualities but highlighting your better ones). Like being “interesting” – having a novel interest to talk about, or a hobby that gets attention – rather than trying to trick women into abandoning their boundaries.
That shit isn’t about trickery, or “status”, or being an “alpha”. It’s about being a complete human being. If people of both sexes find affluence attractive, it’s often because having your shit together financially can be seen as a reflection of having your shit together in general. If confidence is sexy, it’s because it shows someone has things going for them. Someone who’s made an effort with their appearance is showing they’re willing to make an effort in general.
Whining that other people are getting more action than you is pretty sad when they’re just trying harder to be people defined by more than just their sexual activity or lack thereof.
I have to confess that I am a sinner. I tend to prefer guys who’re tall and kind of lanky. I will (and have) date short guys too, but in terms of who tends to catch my eye first, yep, tall guys. And I don’t even find a certain tall lanky British comedian attractive, even though he’s tall and lanky, that’s how picky I am! Feminists – we’re in your internets, ruining men’s lives by having sexual preferences.
(This may be partly because I’m short and so tall people are the only ones whose faces I can see in a crowd.)
No seriously, isn’t unfreelandfuck everyone’s nightmare on this thread? **raises hand**
It’s not your dream to date an Internet atheist who thinks he’s a paragon of rationality, is totally cool with equality unless it means actually treating people as equals, has long-winded, implausible, oddly prostitution-themed theories for fixing all social ills, seems to especially dislike women, and brags about being a douchebag because it’s so clever and independent of him?
Because that is usually a guaranteed panty-moistener. Mmm, the alluring perfume of the well-aged fedora.
::sends Flying Mouse internet fist-bump back::
Not only short guys, but guys who aren’t conventionally-handsome-by-20th-century-standards, or wealthy, or shitbag misogynists!
You’d almost think women have varied tastes, tastes a lot broader than the bonerwhiners want to admit.
Rancid Nads: I will never “reexamine my preferences”. My attraction is to ONE man. You’re basically telling women to allow men we aren’t interested in to fuck us. May you spend the rest of your life feeling like you’re having an allergic reaction to dermestid beetle larvae.
It’s better to have loved a short man than never to have loved a tall.
Burn the witch!
I find tall guys, especially if they’re big as well, too intimidating. Not that attraction or dating is in the picture, just as a matter of not feeling comfortable around them. I hate being loomed over.
katz, LOL!
This thread is full of monstrous women, oppressing men with our opinions. Let’s keep it up.
“This thread is full of monstrous women, oppressing men with our opinions. Let’s keep it up.”
Women are MISANDRY!
Seriously, internet creepers, I’m not willing to “reexamine my preferences” even at the request of people who I’m basically in agreement with on most issues, so why on earth would you think I’d be willing to do so for the sake of someone who I’m about as fond of as I would be of a pile of maggots covered in roaches and sour milk?
It sounds as if high school and the teen years are the same as they were 45 years ago. I have no patience with the guys who were ignored by the “beautiful people.” That accounts for most of us in the common herd. People have crazy expectations about what they’re entitled to. What do they have to give in exchange? Nothing, apparently. So they throw deadly tantrums.
@ kittehs
That’s why they have to be both tall and fairly thin, see. Tall + super muscly = help I’m being attacked by a Grizzly bear. It’s not even so much about them being taller than me, the tall thing, I just like the look of long limbs.
(Do angry dudebros even realize that some women like and therefore tend to look at men’s legs? I like men’s legs, they’re sexy.)
Gotta go to bed, but StrivingAlly, I do enjoy your posts. Goodnight all!
I get that – long limbs do look lovely.
I always liked slim, and never liked muscly at all – I can’t stand the washboard-shouldn’t-he-have-a-bra-on look. It just looks aggressive to me and that creeps me out.
Love handles have their place, too. ;)
Legs! And nice arms. Not muscly, just warm and solid.
Yep. If the worst thing that ever happened to you is that you never met a girl in HS who thought your Mr. Gumby impression was the funniest thing ever and your Call of Cthulhu Character was brilliant, you don’t have problems.
Grow the fuck up. You aren’t misunderstood. You’re a self-centered pain in the ass with a chip on his shoulder.
I love the Iron Throne scene from P&R. I love people who nerd out and are not afraid to let their passion for things show. If being cool means never being excited about things, then I hope I’m never cool.
I think that’s why I feel more comfortable with and attracted to shorter guys. I tend to like men that are bulkier*, and the few guys I’ve dated that were tall and broad were kind of overwhelming.
+1 to sexy man legs! And I don’t think angry dudebros realize that some women like anything in particular – they’re too busy telling us what we want.
*Note to dudely lurkers – bulky in this case can mean muscled, or solid, or chubby. Take your whining about women wanting bodybuilders elsewhere.
I was watching some random Kpop video the other day (OMG women openly letching at men! Burn the witch!) and because one of the guys was in shorts all the comments were of the “OMG his thighs! Why doesn’t he wear shorts more often? That’s it, I am building a shrine to his thighs right now” variety and I had a moment where I was all, this would confuse the shit out of the kind of guys who post long internet screeds about what they think women go for, wouldn’t it?
RE: Robert Ramirez
I have been suspecting that there is a connection between the new misogyny and Geek culture.
You aren’t the only one. There seem to be some old guard misogynists that we mock here, but a lot of the shit we mock here is really grossly familiar to me. (Among my old system duties, now thankfully over, was getting rid of twee nerdboys who saw us as their Manic Pixie Dream Savior.)
RE: Woody
What you call “nww misogyny” is actually “waking up.” The younger generation is waking up.
Woody, I’m so proud of you! You didn’t reference Paul Elam OR Mike Buchanan! We’ll make a human being out of you yet!
RE: emilygoddess
Now, is this your seventh [expletive] anniversary, or the seventh anniversary of your fucking? :-P
Seventh fucking anniversary. Unfortunately, massive rape triggers pretty much delayed the seventh anniverary of fucking for a couple months. (Which, guess what, my husband didn’t act like an asshole about! Because he’s not an asshole.)
RE: Kittehs
Also: your anniversary is on my birthday. Sweet!
No way!
I find tall guys, especially if they’re big as well, too intimidating.
I used to. Then I met hubby, who is a goddamn TANK. (6’5, 240ish pounds.) Apparently a lot of his social skills were crafted so as NOT to be intimidating to people. He succeeded.
THIS. That was one of those skin-crawling conversations (or a couple of ‘em, my memory has dustbunnies today).
The creepers never get the difference between “I like X, Y and Z in a person, I find those attractive” and “I expect all persons of my preferred sex(es) have those traits, because it’s an attack on my boner if they don’t, and they are required to put out for me.”
Somehow I don’t think I’d get anywhere complaining that blokes aren’t all going around with long curly hair and neatly trimmed moustaches and hourglass-shaped beards, let alone putting out for me on demand (sorry, “being open to approaches” from a total stranger). Yet the equivalent of this is exactly what the dudebros complain isn’t happening.
I admit, my tastes in men seem to have been permanently warped by my history, and I’m kind of ashamed about it. Slender geeky guys have pretty much been rendered sexual nonentities to me; there’s just too many bad memories and associations there. I’m happy to be friends with them, I am totally okay with them being attracted to me in a nonskeezy way, but I would never, ever want to be romantically involved with one. I’m a little ashamed of it, like I’m not giving them a fair shake but… no really guys, there were SO MANY rapey nerdboys.
That’s a pretty specific type, though. Generally, I prefer older, bulkier guys who aren’t chiseled. I blame hubby for that; basically what reminds me of him is what’s attractive to me. So, Ron Perlman is way closer to the ballpark of my preference than… hell, I dunno, Matt Smith. (Though he’s not QUITE my type, but you know what I mean.)
Yeah, I mean, it’s not as if I’m angry about the existence of men who I don’t find sexually appealing, and in fact I’ve had warm and friendly relationships with men who I don’t want to have sex with all my life (omg friendzoning!). Having preferences isn’t oppressive, it’s when you start demanding that everyone of your preferred gender/s meet those preferences, and act like the ones who don’t are un-people, that there’s a problem.
Cassandra – LOL to the thigh moment!
OT: episode of Time Team where a war vet was asked what got him into watching the show (he’d had depression, spent a lot of the time watching the show, and had since organised an archaeological group for vets to help with their trauma, learn new skills, and so on).
Vet’s answer why he was into the show: “I think it was Phil Harding’s legs in those hot pants.”
Mum and I cracked up.
I think quite a few big guys – ones who aren’t douches/oblivious – do that.
I’ve even met tall guys who’re very skinny who do that. It just makes sense to be conscious of the fact that your looming over people might be intimidating and try not to do that, if you’re a nice person who doesn’t want to make other people uncomfortable and you want people to like you.
I’d be in trouble if I was angry about the existence of men I don’t find sexually appealing, because that’s all except one! There are plenty of guys I find aesthetically appealing, sure (Geoge Clooney, George Harrison … no I don’t have a thing for the name George, really) but that’s as far as it goes, I wouldn’t be chasing ‘em given the chance even if Mr K wasn’t around.
The chiseled face: ugh, just no, it’s the opposite of what I like. Gimme curves, gimme feminine-with-moustache!
Plus cuddly. I’ve discovered the pleasures of cuddly, both the obvious (cuddling) and the look. Maybe I’ve come to appreciate padding since Mr K started showing his appreciation of mine, or maybe it’s just that I’m not limited to what he was like back then (thin from ill-health – it still set the standard).
Yeah, I have no trouble believing it, it just wasn’t something I’d encountered before. In some ways, I think hubby’s actually RELIEVED to now be in our pint-size vessel, so he doesn’t loom anymore or have ungodly problems fitting into car seats or showers. Plus it allows him to actually start exploring his femme side, since he never dared to back in his old life. (He was in a very macho profession; the most he felt safe doing was having slightly longer hair than average.)
I am more than happy to encourage my husband in his expanded taste in wardrobe and hairstyle.
Oh, and since I’m gushing about hubby anyway, he marched in the local pride parade with his church. HIs choice of wardrobe? Pink and orange hot pants that he borrowed from my sister.
So not my taste, but not gonna lie, we looked FUCKING AMAZING in them! I never realized how dumpy our vessel looked in my cargo shorts…
Also, since we know we have an audience of clueless dudebros whose ideas about what women want come entirely from other clueless dudebros – that kind of thing, where men realize that their physical presence could be imposing and actively take steps to make women feel safer around them? We notice and appreciate it, or at least I do. Now, is that a guarantee that we’ll fuck you? No, not if we’re not attracted to you in general. But is it part of what goes into the “hooking up with this guy, yes or no?” filter when we’re deciding whether or not to get involved with a particular man? Yes, yes it is.
Eeeee, cool!
Was that the pride marche George Takei led?
The MRM in three words.
I don’t watch P&R (or GoT), but Community’s Abed Nadir is basically a walking TV Tropes, on a show that’s basically TV Tropes: The Series, so I think he spoke for all of us nerds when he explained, “I guess I just like liking things”.
@thread and the discussion of guy hotness, I can’t be the only one who actually likes chubby guys. They tend to have such nice smiles, and they’re soft when you hug them <3
Um…I mean…muscly, slender guys only for me. Your wallet had better be the only part of you that's fat! Am I doing it right, undfreeland?
And when you decide you’re entitled to a partner who meets those preferences
@B
Janeway is a terrible captain!?! That’s nonsense talk, next you’ll saying she and Seven of Nine weren’t having sex.
Woody’s like the fifth troll on this thread so it’s unlikely he’ll stand out.
Happy Anniversary, LBT!
I don’t think I have any hard and fast preferences for physical characteristics in men. (Aside from definitely not liking the mountain man beard. That is a deal breaker.) I know I dig a certain style a little more than others but, short, tall, thin, thick, dark, pale or whatever does’t seem to matter. Either he makes my heart go “pitty-pat” or he don’t. I’m not actively looking, so it can take me by surprise when I notice a man is indeed attractive. There are certain voices that definitely get my attention or it’s a smile or just a general air about a man that makes me want to be around him. There are definitely men with sexy, sexy brains and personalities I could just bask in. Being funny is attractive to me. Being a genuinely decent, considerate person is attractive. Being open, honest, vulnerable and passionate? Attractive.
I have found that there are men I find physically appealing until they open their mouths and nothing but ugly comes out. Do not want! Run away! The appeal dies a quick and ugly death, never to return.
We all have our own personal preferences. I know straight and bi women who love a man in a suit, others who like a man in jeans and mud, others who like a guy in eyeliner and others who think a Jason Statham looking broken nose is the height of hot. Lucky for us all, the world is full of a variety of human beings and none of us are required to like anything we don’t want to.
@Shaenon
For me, this website has opened a door into a world where theories like this exist. Thanks David?
I see Woody left their requisite single dollop of shit, like they appear to do in every single thread since they came in with stars in their eyes for Paul Elam. I suspect that Woody is concerned if they kept it up in a single thread they’d eventually be banned, but honestly Woody’s pseudo-hyperlogic from their debut performance suggests it would be more for boredom than for really skeevy shit like one-hit wonder Lycere or the awfulness exhibited by undfreeland.
@ brooked
Did you see the old Antz comments about the bots? Those were a trip.
RE: Kittehs
Was that the pride marche George Takei led?
Psh, I wish. This was the one with God Hates Fags marching. (No, not protestors. Marchers. Ehhhnk.)
RE: emilygoddess
I can’t be the only one who actually likes chubby guys.
Sure. I like bulky guys. Hubby’s more on the trim, muscley type, but I don’t care if the muscle has padding or not.
@cassandrakitty
Is that an old troll with a hankering for sexbots? I’ve heard people reminisce about him but I haven’t seen him do his magic. Is there a classic thread?
Did anyone see Lady Rainicorn’s funny comment from a few pages back?
@Lea same here. I’ve dated all sorts of guys, and I wasn’t even physically attracted to Busband when I first met him. I fell for his personality, wonder of wonders. He wasn’t even rich! Clearly I misander rong.
@LBT happy anniversary! *throws glitter*
No, I missed that, cloudiah – classic!
We should have a privileged Furrinati discussion. Think of the outrage if their privilege was pointed out to them. ::casts nervous look at the kitties::
Damn. I didn’t really think it was a big march, but wanted to be sure. :(
@Thread: where was that Lycere character’s comment? I scrolled back but couldn’t find it.
I got the hots just looking at Mr K’s picture (and a crappy reproduction it was, too). Learning about his personality sealed the deal. Money was never going to be a factor; in fact I’ve spent oodles of money because of him, not least on air fares and hotels, so I must be misandering rong too.
I hear you. None of my cats can see their Puss Privilege. They cry Pussandry all the time.
Our big cat Stella (aka Stella The Hut, aka Stellatubbie) exhibits aggrieved entitlement whenever she is in the presence of Blackforest ham.
No women don’t like assholes at all. That’s just a myth promoted by Nice Guys(tm) who believe any guy with a girlfriend is an asshole, right?
http://www.people.com/article/mug-shot-goes-viral-jeremy-meeks-stockton-police-department-facebook
@kittehs
Oh I suspect they are actually aware of it. They simply find it insufficient. (I am typing this in the hall closet lest I am found out)
My current cat seems to be catandering wrong. She has no interest in people food at all as far as I can tell and doesn’t beg for/try to steal anything I’m eating. My last cat would attempt to eat everything from chicken biryani to grapes.
@cassandrakitty your cat sounds pretty beta. Or Omega. Zeta, even.
But she’s a girl cat, so I guess that means she’s just lazy and is waiting for me to bring the various foodstuffs to her.
Emilygoddess,
You are not alone! Oh no, you are not alone. There are definitely fat guys who can turn my knees to water with a look.
I don’t mind examining my preferences, I mind people talking to me as if I have not and do not know my own mind.
Growing up in a stifling environment where I was taught all things sex were black and white and good girls didn’t means I have had alot to discover and examine concerning sex and relationships. There are things about sexuality, romantic love and gender that I still have to learn, because learning never stops and I’m not the wisest of the wise. Rando, misogynist, shallow, internet assholes do not know what those things are and I never asked for their advice. Doing just fine without them, thanks.
Hmm…
I have seen thighs that deserve an alter of their own. Still, it is beautiful shoulders that tend to catch my attention.
Here’s another sort of weird thing that may be TMI. I think bare feet are kinda sexy There is something …intimate and relaxed about a man with bare feet. I like it.
Happy anniversary, LBT!
Kitteh, I’m pretty sure David deleted the Lycere (?) comment. It had a blatant rape apology/threat in it. It was pretty gross.
Forearms for me – I love a man’s forearms. And hands.
To clarify, when I wrote this:
“That’s because when women find them attractive and give them permission, they ARE entitled.”
I tried to add a faux “sarcasm” tag but the parser interpreted it as an HTML tag and removed it. So read it with a sarcasm/ at the end.
Of course no one is “entitled” to other people’s bodies. My point was that men like Tiger Woods certainly act like they are can get away with it much of the time.
” “This goes the some way for women as well. The situation is that roughly 70 percent of heterosexual women and men want to pair off with the top 20 percent most attractive members of the opposite sex. Even when an average man or woman is attracted to an average potential partner, there’s a good chance that person is holding out for someone more attractive. This is especially true in high school or college where people are more likely to try to pick partners that impress their friends. ”
What a shock that this paragraph is all assumptions recycled from the manosphere and bad TV shows and movies. I’m also very surprise that you have nothing to back this up. I’m sure you and Unfreedland will get along so well.”
I never mentioned TV shows or movies. What are you referring to?
It is often said here that “Nice Guys” only want very conventionally attractive women. But no one has ever cited a study to back that up. Now I’ll concede that is true in some cases, but don’t many women also seek only conventionally attractive men and men with money and status? Do many families not pressure their daughters to marry men with high-paying jobs? Or do heterosexual women only care about how much a man respects women as people when choosing a partner?
” ” If no one likes those sexist douchebags, why are they able to have regular sex????? This is why many women have to take a hard look at who they’re attracted to. I’m not saying that anyone should sleep with anyone they’re not attracted to, but many people should take a harder look at who they find attractive and why. ”
Who says they’re all the biggest douchebags are having all the sex? First of all, how do you define douchebag? Second of all, have you verified their claims that they are getting all this sex from multiple partners? ”
This was a response to Sarah who said she sure there are douchebags having regular sex, so this question was directed at her. This reminded me of a magazine article I once saw “No Women Wants a Sleep-Around Guy” which made me wonder how they could be sleep-around guys if no one wanted them.
I like the backs of necks, and hands too. And I always notice men’s noses. Is that weird? I think I notice all adults’ noses, though – I just appreciate a well-proportioned nose on a person, especially if it has a little bump on it.
gasp … choke … can’t breathe, laughing too hard …
@serrana – I wondered if he had, but didn’t see a comment from him saying so.
Yup, I like bare feet. Works well, since Mr K refuses to wear slippers for some reason.
Hands, ooh yes, lovely hands, not too big, but a skilled craftsman’s hands (no this is not a euphemism or double entendre!)
Sloping shoulders. Don’t like square shoulders, but a nice sloping line …
I like the backs of necks, and hands too. And I always notice men’s noses. Is that weird? I think I notice all adults’ noses, though – I just appreciate a well-proportioned nose on a person, especially if it has a little bump on it.
I notice aquiline noses – usually ‘cos I’m thinking, now if only he had a lot more chin, he’d look like a certain someone in profile. Yes I am obsessive. :P
Oh, all right, blockquote mammoth, what’s your problem today?
*throws confetti*
Happy 7th, LBT!