A creepy expat in Southeast Asia explains why money = tits and how this makes exploiting poor women for sex ok
The sexiest man alive?
Over on Random Xpat Rantings the terrible excuse for a human being who calls himself Xplat sets forth an intriguing proposition: for men in search of sexy times, having money is the equivalent of a woman having tits.
In other words, it’s not absolutely necessary for a man to have big bucks to garner the attention of the opposite sex, just as it’s not absolutely necessary for a woman to have something in the tit department in order to garner the attention of men, but it helps. A lot.
Oh, by the way, the title of the post in which he sets forth this theory is “ALL women are inherently gold diggers down to their pussy juice.”
Let’s let him explain, in his own icky way:
Women know their value. They know they can trade their value for their benefit. In [South-East Asia] this is not a dirty little secret. It’s not even an open secret. It’s just a fact of life. Money is part of the equation, blatantly and openly. …
Money-and-power-and-social-status is exactly equal to breasts. It can be a cause of sexual attraction in and of itself, and can maintain a relationship when there is nothing else being offered.
Yeah, I’m pretty sure when someone is literally interested in nothing about you except your money, you’re not actually in a “relationship” with that person.
Women aren’t men with vaginas. Their sexual attraction triggers are different. It’s not just that they fuck for food. Not JUST a matter of pragmatic sales of a service. Actual attraction is ALSO involved.
I like big bucks and I cannot lie?
Now, of course Xsplat here is challenging the common PUA gospel that men shouldn’t rely on money to win over their “targets” but rather on being cool and caddish and, you know, going to places where there’s a good chance a lot of the women will be pretty drunk.
Manospherians hampsterbate about this with a zillion “ya buts”. Ya, but you don’t NEED money. Yup, and girls don’t NEED tits.
Having tits is better and more attractive anyway, and girls with tits can get more and better quality men.
Having money is better in exactly the same way. You don’t see many flat chested Penthouse centerfolds, nor are there many broke romance novel heros.
Well, I don’t know much about romance novels, but from what I hear there’s a shitload of slash fiction about two dudes named Sam and Dean who basically live out of their car.
It’s not the case that SOME girls are gold diggers.
It’s just a matter of all the gold diggers mining for gold in different ways.
And of course all of this turns out to be a justification for Xplat’s own use of his relative wealth, as a western expat living in Southeast Asia, to exploit impoverished women for sex.
For me sex is about ecstatic intimacy. Money helps to get more intimacy with a greater percentage of girls, and higher quality girls. I choose to allow egoic esteem to include finances. Money is not cheating. Money helps to skin the cat. Money is not separate from my fantastic ethereal self. Money is part of what I am; part and parcel of what I am to a woman.
That’s got to be one of the creepiest and most delusional excuses for sexual exploitation I think I’ve ever run across in the three years of doing this blog.
Posted on November 24, 2013, in creepy, men who should not ever be with women ever, misogyny, PUA, sexual exploitation and tagged misogyny, pick-up artists, PUA, sexual exploitation. Bookmark the permalink. 607 Comments.
O.O bbeaty, you have a superpower!
Jeez, I’m glad mine don’t do that. I don’t need more bits of the anatomy wanting to proofread.
Shit, if my boobs were able to proofread, I’d have an A cup due to all of the exercise. :P
No, Grandpa Grodyguts, it’s ALL you are to these women, because you’re PAYING them to feign interest and fake orgasms. Were you to drop dead tomorrow, nobody would miss you. Your wallet, maybe, but not YOU. Put THAT in your “egoic esteem” and smoke it, old fart.
Sorry, Kittehs. I’m just tetchy today, for reasons completely unrelated to anyone here. (An acquaintance is getting really gruesomely bullied online by someone else, at a level that actually makes the trolls HERE look civil. It’s… really awful, and I want to be helpful, but there’s not much more I can do at this point, plus my husband feels pretty shitty and just ugh all around.)
O RLY? I have quite the pair, but they haven’t yet snared me a prince. Been eyed up by a lot of douchebags, but I don’t exactly count that as sexual success.
LBT – :( I’m sorry about your acquaintance (bullying freaking SUCKS), and hope that your husband feels better and not so shitty.
LBT – no worries from me, and I’m really sorry your friend’s copping that horrible shit. Long distance hugs for you and Mac.
Alice – hmm, now if I could teach mah belleh to proofread … this could be the ultimate exercise regime!
PS ‘mah belleh’ was lolspeak, it wasn’t taking off anyone’s accent. Well, except kitties’, maybe.
The “having tits” thing is also lulzy. Most women have breasts, yes? What he appears to mean is “having big tits”, but that’s not actually the same thing.
Ugh. Bullying is awful. Hope your acquaintance is okay, LBT. Your husband, too. And jedi hugs if you want them.
Expecting dudes to use the actual names for women’s body parts is misandry!
My tits have done nothing for me. I’ll be sure to give them a stern talking to.
OT (but it’s cat related, dunno if that’s ever really OT), but just now in “questions I never thought I’d ask,” tonight’s was “Who left the poop stain on the duvet?” Really, cats? Butt cleaning fail.
Barring a mastectomy, yup.
And no, big ones are not a magic ticket to a great life with a superlative partner. If anything, they seem to bring the hyenas out of the woods.
(LBT, hang in there! Hugs if you want ‘em.)
@Kittehs, it’s also obscene. What state was that where the legislator was chastised for using the word “uterus” when arguing against an abortion restriction bill? Or was it “vagina”? In either case, he was shut down for using obscene language. Proper medical terminology is unchristian! Or something.
Yeah, it’ll be okay. It’s actually pervocracy, a Boobzer emeritus! I feel bad that he’s getting trolled. And hubby’s just feeling the pressure of us moving soon, but not yet, and so we’re stuck cooling our heels and living out of a backpack for the next month plus. Plus holidays are just ASS. They’re such a fucking misery, and I wish they didn’t exist.
But maybe we’ll feel a bit better and Mac’ll cook something good for Thanksgiving dinner, some ungodly chicken pasta veggie stir fry thing.
Proper medical terminology of the female reproductive system is an atheist feminazi gay Jewish Furrinati commie pinko Muslim Freemanson conspiracy!
For that reason, we shall forever more refer to the female reproductive system as “vajayjay” and “down there”! IT HAS BEEN RULED!
*bangs gavel*
LBT – Oh, so do I refer to Cliff as he/his/him? I wasn’t sure, I’ve been reading zir blog and I know about the gender question, but I never found out what the resolution was.
Also, oh man, that REALLY sucks. :(
Jeez, some shitbag’s trolling Cliff? I hope he shuts the dirtbag down quicksmart.
Unimaginative – arrgh, my eyes just rolled out again.
Alice –
::dies::
hellkell – correct, cat stuff is never OT.
I think I had cat poo on pajamas recently, which would be a Fribbie butt-cleaning fail.
Shit…Is it anything we can help? Like, is it public trolling or PMs?
RE: Alice
I think Cliff has mentioned he doesn’t really care? *spreads hands* I’m not entirely sure.
As for the nature of the bullying… well, see for yourself.
Also, ALL THE WARNINGS for suicide and OMGWTFery.
A continuation of ALL THE WARNINGS.
So, if I understand this correctly, Dude came up with an app to help people identify predators. Cliff had some concerns about how useful and effective it would be in real life. Dude took extreme offence at being thus critiqued and pulled out Every. Single. Bullshit. Internet. Troll. talking point that exists to not only rebuke him, but insist Cliff should die for not cheering Dude on.
And Cliff is the bully. Fuck sake.
What. The. Fuck?
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?
That person needs to fuck a cactus. Telling people that they should totally kill themselves is NOT cool. In fact, it makes you an asshole, and FUCK THEM.
LBT – Good to know. I guess at some point I should ask Cliff directly, so that I know for sure.
Yup. You see why I’m horrified. Especially since this is a guy I’ve actually met and advertised our shit once. I want him far, far away from me, and I want nothing to do with him.
WTF!?
RE: Alice
But it’s to fight bullying, guys! How can you not understand the elegant glory that is his solution to bullying! JUST MAKE BULLIES KILL THEMSELVES! It’s genius!
(Sorry, that was me reacting to the “if you’re still alive” comments directed at Cliff.)
LBT – Oh of course. All we need to do is tell bullies to go kill themselves, and bullying will be solved! FUCK people who have been suicidal and would find offense at this strategy, and FUCK decent people! SOLVE BULLYING! GO KILL YOURSELVES BULLIES!
/sarcasm
It’s okay, David. My reaction was pretty much the same. And I know it’s off-topic, it’s just… it’s HORRIBLE. I mean, I’m used to people like NWO and Tom Martin and Antz, but this just horrifies me, especially because this guy, he styles himself a goddamn activist, and people BELIEVE it.
I’ve been trying to support Cliff (though I don’t know him that well), and I’ve also been warning my kink friends in Ohio, so they can warn their kink friends, and hopefully get him barred from the scenes there. But it just horrifies and appalls me, y’know?
OP – How thoroughly have you failed as a human being when you’re proudly declaring that money is part and parcel of what you are? Even most rich, entitled assholes like to pretend that their money is a sign of their awesomeness, not an integral part of it.
LBT – Somebody’s bullying Cliff? Fucker. What can we do about this?
I’m… I’m not sure, seraph. I’m pretty open to ideas, honestly. If you know Cliff, sending him supportive messages might be good?
You know, I frequently disagree with the things that Cliff writes about kink, but telling him to kill himself has never struck me as a productive way to address those disagreements.
(Following links, that whole argument reminds me of why I nopetopussed away from the BSDM scene as soon as I got the California.)
Oh FFS.
http://maybemaimed.com/2010/04/30/yes-men-can-be-feminist-leaders/
Maybe your acquaintances just don’t feel comfortable around you? Because I’ve been quite happily cuddling male acquaintances for as long as I can remember.
More ugh.
Dude, sex work is a JOB. It is completely unreasonable to expect a sex worker not to draw boundaries between her job and her personal life.
If he just wasn’t interested in visiting sex workers then cool, whatever, but the whole WAH THEY ARE FAILING TO MEET MY NEEDS BY HAVING BOUNDARIES thing raises so many red flags.
The entry title alone makes me side-eye. Why SHOULD a man be a feminist leader? Is there some obvious candidate for the damned title?
Seeing the number of assholes who seem to try to claim it, I’d rather pass, thanks.
You have to read it! Apparently the person who wasn’t cool with him wanting to be a feminist leader should have known that it was OK for him to be one because he’s submissive and Jewish. Wut?
why would I want to be with someone who is proactively separating me out of their personal lives?
Because they’re not your friend. They’re a professional, who you pay for the privilege of their service. Cope.
I am so offended that my barista doesn’t want to come to my house and make me coffee. I think I’ll write a blogpost about it.
The more I hear about this guy, the creepier and creepier and more awful I find him.
*rolls eyes* I’m submissive, queer, and trans. And my favorite treat is dark, dark chocolate. None of these facts have ANYTHING that make me capable of being a feminist leader. Ain’t nobody made you Queen of Madames, dillweed.
Translation: let’s render the concept of oppression meaningless by assuming that oppressors and oppressed people are equally disadvantaged by a system of oppression.
You snarking this makes me feel SO MUCH BETTER, CassandraSays. Really. I couldn’t actually bear to read that shit myself, and I was getting pretty upset over it, but somehow, mocking makes it small and mean and petty, like it actually is.
Also, being a subby queer boy doesn’t make you an honorary woman. SHOCK.
But… that’s not what oppression… means… AUGH MY HEAD IT BURNS
Obfuscating word salad, it’s what’s for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
Feminists are… submissive and Jewish? Um, yeah. I got nothin’.
@ LBT
He seems to think that because he’s a sub women shouldn’t be allowed to view him as a potential threat, even if they don’t actually know that he’s a sub, which is just…dude, you fail feminism 101. Go stand in the corner and think about what you’ve done.
Just saw it now. That is incredibly awful. Jesus, these fuckers don’t even deserve to be compared to shit.
The worst thing is that I agree with him that the BSDM scene is far less friendly to subs and concerned with their needs (especially their need to have their boundaries respected) than it pretends to be, but given his blithe disregard for other people’s boundaries and tendency to tell people to kill themselves, I wouldn’t trust him as far as I could throw him.
RE: CassandraSays
Yeah, well, it’s stupid. My hubby’s a switch, and before he met me, he was definitely heavier on the subby side. He’s also 6’5 and built like a linebacker. Surprise surprise, he was always aware of the fact that a lot of people found him instrinsically intimidating!
Also, it’s not like people can tell your kink orientation off the bat. Also, subs can be hella awful people! Just because they’re into something doesn’t make them decent!
(And yes, shit like this is why I never joined the BDSM subculture here either. I kept hearing all these awful horror stories!)
Yeah, well, even a dead clock is right twice a day. Even NWO said something true once in a blue moon, I expect.
I’m still stuck on how lulzy it is that this dude thinks that being a sub means he can’t be a dangerous person. Um, if you go around telling people to kill themselves when they disagree with you, I’m going to go ahead and suspect that you might not be an entirely safe person to be around.
Well you guys dealt with the creepy expat, so I’m left wondering if there’s anything we can do to help Cliff out.
Also wondering if anyone here has been doxxed, since some teenager on Twitter is apparently claiming he’s doxxed us all.
Also, is he following Cliff around with this kill-yourself campaign of his? Because if so, um, ability to respect boundaries, you don’t have it, so please do everyone else a favor and GTFO the BSDM scene.
But he’s an ACTIVISSSSSST! *eyeroll*
Seriously, I’m sorry I ever met this guy. Fucking creepy as hell. I mean, I have exactly one person who I hate. ONE. He almost makes me a theist, just so I could imagine a hell for him to burn in, and I wouldn’t tell HIM to commit suicide. (Even if he weren’t already dead, I mean.) So just… the fuck? What the fuck.
And WHY aren’t other people seeing through him? I mean, I know we get folks like Elam and Roosh, who have their own goddamned fan club. It’s just really gross to see more of it HERE.
My internet is wonky and I’ve been trying to post for a while. I think I missed a bunch of messages in the meantime. Ignore me.
Eh, honestly, most of my encounters with the BSDM scene here have left me with the impression of a bunch of awful people being shitty to each other. This latest round of bullshit does nothing to improve that impression.
RE: cloudiah
I haven’t been doxxed, not that I’ve heard. (And also, not that I’m in a position to really lose much if I did.)
RE: CassandraSays
Also, is he following Cliff around with this kill-yourself campaign of his?
I’m not sure. Cliff has announced their intention of never discussing Maymay again, but I don’t know that the dude is following.
But he already is shit at boundaries.
I don’t think I’ve been doxxed, and I can’t imagine why I’d ever be doxxed, but holy shit that thought terrifies me.
RE: CassandraSays
Yuuuuup, pretty much. Sure, I’d like a space where my kinks didn’t bring the instantaneous response of, “I find that uber-squicky, yech,” but I’ve already experienced sexual violence on a vanilla level. I’d like to have at least ONE area of intimacy not be tainted with abuse!
And frankly, everything I’ve heard about the local scene is they talk big about safe, sane, and consensual, and are filled with abusers who try to find the gray areas so they can hurt people. If I want to get raped, I’ll just stay in the vanilla world, thanks. At least it’ll be nothing new.
I’m pretty sure it’s just one of those internet tough guys. I don’t think he’s actually doxxing anyone.
[Content note: insensitive asshole trivializing suicidal ideation]
Check out this, guys: http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/67794886759/i-dont-know-if-youll-read-this-but-again-im-the
A tone argument. He’s calling an objection to being told to commit suicide A FUCKING TONE ARGUMENT!
May he step on a goddamn catcus.
RE: Ally
When I read shit like that, my brain replies with, “It’s turtles all the way down!” It’s a layer of bullshit, supported by bullshit, all phrased with enough buzzwords and jargon to make it look like it SOUNDS sensible, when it’s actually just an enormous column of bullshit with no actual foundation.
Because this guy is arguing that his telling someone with a history of depression to kill themselves is OKAY.
BLACK IS WHITE! UP IS DOWN! WE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN AT WAR WITH OCEANIA!
This dude is toxic right down to the bone.
Holy shit, that is a person I hope gets hit by a blast of self-awareness, and soon.
All the LEGOs.
There are some things that you SHOULD be ashamed of. That’s one of them. Holy fuck.
Just read another post where he wants to blow up the world because it’s failed to provide him with enough porn that’s specifically tailored to his preferences. LOL.
I remember being perplexed years ago why, if he had such low opinions of the BDSM subculture, he continued BEING THERE. I have yet to meet a subculture so desperately dear to my identity that I can’t stand to leave.
Also, I deal with lack of porn by making my own. Complaining about a lack of porn is… a thing? I guess? I don’t really get it.
I ask of you, cloudiah, if you can’t be ashamed of telling someone (with a history of depression!) to kill themselves, what CAN you be ashamed of?
Seriously, clutch pearls harder!