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kitties off topic open thread

Open Thread for Personal Stuff: September edition

Hugs if you want them.
Hugs if you want them.

This is a continuation from here.  A thread to discuss personal issues and provide support for one another. No trolls, no arguments.

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cloudiah
7 years ago

Ally, That sounds terrible. If it continues, I hope you go to the doctor.

Meanwhile, here is my unsolicited/inexpert advice to try the BRAT method to settle your stomach:
*bananas (the potassium is needed if you’re dehydrated)
*rice (or other starchy foods, like oats or potatoes)
*applesauce
*toast (omit butter or jam/jelly until you’re feeling better)

Other good things IME when I have an upset stomach:
*brothy soups
*herbal tea (but not peppermint tea)
*coconut water (unflavored/unsweetened)

Recommended by other people, but not me personally:
*ginger (too strong a ginger flavor makes me ill, but many people use it against nausea)
*crackers
*yogurt

Fade
7 years ago

semi random, but it probably fits the topic of this thread.

My apartment just replaced the stairs leading up to my house with a gradual walkway. It is now wheelchair accessible!

serrana
serrana
7 years ago

I’m so sorry you’re sick, Ally. I hope you’ve quit throwing up by now and that you’re on the mend.

@Fade Yay for wheelchair accessibility!

grumpycatisagirl
7 years ago

That’s great news, Fade!

Ally, I hope you are feeling better soon.

Marie
Marie
7 years ago

@Auggz

I assume it’s okay here, it is an open thread, but idk I’ve never smoked pot, so I can’t help you :/

inurashii
inurashii
7 years ago

auggz, different bodies react to different chemical changes differently. It’s certainly possible, especially since pot has a sedative effect. Even alcohol works really differently for different people.

katz
7 years ago

Auggz: Not for me, it just makes me feel relaxed, but that is a well-documented effect it has on some people. Better stay away from it.

grumpycatisagirl
7 years ago

I’ve found smoking pot when I’m already depressed to be a horrible idea.

serrana
serrana
7 years ago

I haven’t smoked pot in almost 25 years, because yeah. For me, it increases my shyness and social anxiety exponentially.

Howard Bannister
7 years ago

See, for me, alcohol has the opposite effect. When I’m feeling really anxious and/or depressed alcohol tends to calm me.

Laughing gas nearly freaked me right out into attacking the surgeon. I was getting paranoid and thinking some very violent thoughts.

When they say everybody reacts differently, I thought they meant ‘there’s a narrow range of responses, from weird drunk to normal drunk.’ Turns out they really meant ‘everybody reacts WAY DIFFERENTLY to these things.’

Howard Bannister
7 years ago

My brother said it was great for him too.

I just shudder and nod, shudder and nod…

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Ok, I’m getting the picture I should get over it and try laughing gas already. It was on my short list of no goes, but, ya know, coke wasn’t so I’m being weird (note, this is not anything like y’all shaming me into doing drugs or anything, just commenting how weird it is that I like LSD but haven’t tried laughing gas)

Ally — vomiting bile once your stomach is empty is totally normal. Assuming no blood, and you aren’t vomiting more than 24 hours, you should be fine. Get fluids into you and try cloudiah’s suggestions, also, saltines.

Fade — whee! Accessibility FTW!

kittehserf
7 years ago

Ally, that’s awful. It sounds like the one time I’ve had a full-blown panic attack and couldn’t stop vomiting. One small mercy: at least it’s not food poisoning, it’s too soon if you were just eating the stuff at the time.

Auggz, if you’re depressed already, I’d say it’s a good idea to stay right away from acid or anything like it. Are you on any medication for depression, or did you mean it in the broader sense of being really down?

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

“Also for acid, will it make me have a bad trip if I’m depressed before taking it?”

Possibly? I’ve done it and it made everything better, but I’d tripped so many times before and went into it hoping it’d make everything shiny and right with the world. If you haven’t tripped before, do not do it. If you have, well, your expectations for your trip pretty much make your trip, so I have no advice either way.

FTR, I’ve had one bad trip and it was ‘shrooms (the only mushrooms I’m willing to eat and I’ve since decided that the risk of puking, and my hatred of mushrooms in general, makes it not worth it)

Now, if you can get it, MDMA will almost certainly either make for a happy shiny world, or not hurt any. But again, only if you’ em done it before and are prepared to deal with the after effects since MDMA -> crash -> depressed isn’t uncommon (again, disclosure, I’ve never had that effect)

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

Also, be careful who you hang with doing MDMA. I’ve always been super sensitive to other people moods while on that.

Ally S
7 years ago

Thanks everyone. I had some Gatorade to alleviate my dehydration (usually it helps me after I’ve thrown up – I’m not exactly sure why). Right now, though, I need to rest for at least two hours because I feel extremely weak and tired right now. I was going to eat something, but I decided not to because that would make me feel even worse.

Uh, idk if this question is OK here, but does anyone ever get super super depressed from smoking pot?

Sometimes that happens to me, but the depressed feelings usually come as my high is going away. I’ll feel relaxed and joyful right after smoking, and then by the time my high is gone, I’ll feel like shit and sometimes even break down.

emilygoddess
7 years ago

What if I really am a terrible, self-centered person who doesn’t deserve to be loved, and my “abusive” parent was just trying to be honest with me?

Ally S
7 years ago

Also for acid, will it make me have a bad trip if I’m depressed before taking it?

My step-dad tells me that you should never take any kind acid (especially LSD) unless you’re in a good mood, you’re not depressed or anxious, and you’re in a peaceful environment. Bad acid trips can send people to the psychiatric ward and cause permanent damage.

grumpycatisagirl
7 years ago

Emily, I only know you from your comments here but they indicate you are a wonderful person with a big heart who cares deeply for others. I am quite certain you deserve lots of love.

katz
7 years ago

Emily, is that a real question? Because seriously, that’s never actually true.

And if you’re wondering if it’s true, then inevitably it isn’t, because terrible self-centered people don’t wonder whether they are terrible.

grumpycatisagirl
7 years ago

“And if you’re wondering if it’s true, then inevitably it isn’t, because terrible self-centered people don’t wonder whether they are terrible.”

Actually, katz, thank you for that, even though I know it isn’t addressed to me. I’ve been spending quite a bit of time lately wondering if I am terrible. There’s been a catalog running in my head lately of all the times I’ve been a jerk before.

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

While your general headspace and environment is important while tripping, this:

Bad acid trips can send people to the psychiatric ward and cause permanent damage.

Is pretty much a damn urban legend.

Emily: you are awesome. Seriously.

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Emilygoddess — “what if my abusive parent was right about me?” Should always default to “unpossible”.

Seriously, I have a policy about giving the 180 view of my fathr’s a fair shake. Which is how I’m here and not a bigoted asshole 🙂

So no, you are not a terrible person, nor anything else said parent(s) called you. They said it to hurt you, not because it was true.

Athywren
Athywren
7 years ago

What if I really am a terrible, self-centered person who doesn’t deserve to be loved, and my “abusive” parent was just trying to be honest with me?

People are not terrible, self-centred and undeserving of love in a definitive sense – these things are not inborn but are determined by actions and are mutable. They’re certainly not set in stone in childhood.
To my mind, someone is only terrible if they’re actively working to hurt others – as long as you’re not doing that, you’re probably not terrible (and, to be honest, what I’ve read from you previously on this site has lead me to believe in an unterrible Emily).
Don’t mistake thinking of yourself with being self-centred. Self-centred people think of themselves almost exclusively, rarely thinking of the feelings of others. Having your own wants and needs doesn’t count as self-centred.
It takes a lot to be undeserving of love. I can think of little that would disqualify a person. I seriously doubt you’ve done any of those things.

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Hellkell — depends how much acid. I knew a kid who downed an entire sheet and ended up in the psych ward. Idk if his weirdness was because of that or why he did that though. But it isn’t impossible, though self-admitting cuz you freak has to be more common and you’ll be fine when it wears off (actually, THAT is my prime advice for tripping — just remember that whatever happens, you’ll be back to normal in the morning [assuming you trip early in the day, which I recommend])

serrana
serrana
7 years ago

Emily, everyone deserves to be loved. Anybody who would tell some one that they didn’t deserve to be loved is abusive, regardless of circumstances.

Also, what everyone else said.

hellkell
hellkell
7 years ago

Does this friend not have the internet?

katz
7 years ago

Actually, katz, thank you for that, even though I know it isn’t addressed to me. I’ve been spending quite a bit of time lately wondering if I am terrible. There’s been a catalog running in my head lately of all the times I’ve been a jerk before.

Ugh, I hate it when my mind gets hung up on bad things I said/did in the past.

But the fact that you’re thinking about them and you know they were bad means that you’ll be more sensitive in the future. And in general it means that you care about how your actions affect other people and so you’re going to generally be a nice person all the time.

Ally S
7 years ago

Emily, is that a real question? Because seriously, that’s never actually true.

And if you’re wondering if it’s true, then inevitably it isn’t, because terrible self-centered people don’t wonder whether they are terrible.

Seconding this.

While your general headspace and environment is important while tripping, this:

Bad acid trips can send people to the psychiatric ward and cause permanent damage.

Is pretty much a damn urban legend.

That’s what happened to one of my step-dad’s friends. He’s in a horrible mental state now, and he still hasn’t left the psychiatric hospital. I could be wrong about it being common, though.

kittehserf
7 years ago

N’thing the comments that Emily is Unterrible.

“What my parents told me” reminds me of something Mum said years ago – that whatever I am, it’s what she and the male parental unit* made me. Not wholly true, of course, but she has a point about the parents doing so much of the shaping of a child. They’re the ones with the power and the responsibility, and they don’t get to worm out of it by blaming a child for what it is.

(I’m presuming we’re not talking about a parent speaking to adult offspring who’s done something vile here; I’d have no trouble with an MRA’s parent tellilng him he’s a terrible person.)

*Mum didn’t call him that, though it occurs to me I should introduce her to the term …

cloudiah
7 years ago

Emily, What everyone else said plus all the hugs.

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

Relatedly, where are my goddamned flashbacks ?! I was promised flashbacks! (This is a running joke with myself and a couple of friends — if I’m gonna have flashbacks, I want morherfucking acid flashbacks!)

Cuz see, my sources, for everything, have been the sort who try it themselves before playing it for sale to others. So bad acid is not a thing I had to worry about. Excellent acid otoh…*wanders off smiling*

kittehserf
7 years ago

Auggz, was she the budgie who’d been through hell with her beak, and your parents not wanting to take her to the vet, and who was quite jealous of you? Or am I thinking of someone else altogether?

katz
7 years ago

I’m sorry to hear about your featherbaby, Auggz.

Argenti Aertheri
7 years ago

RIP auggz’s birdie friend. I’m sure you gave her a nice happy life (and quietly of old age is perhaps the easiest way to lose a pet…)

Oh gods…speaking of acid and losing pets. I was tripping when I got the call that my 18 year old cat had died. I’d had her since I was too small to remember, and despite knowing 18 was damn old for an outdoor cat, wasn’t ready…well, I took it surprisingly well, and I suspect it was the acid softening it.

Auggz, I’m so sorry, it’s rarely easy, even with the consolation that she had a long happy life and went peacefully.

kittehserf
7 years ago

On a happy personal note: today’s the fifth anniversary of our kinda-wedding. It was more like a wedding reception, because there were certainly no formalities or legalities; needing any kind of authority to acknowledge/formalise a marriage is not a thing across the veil. It was more a gathering and excuse to frock up, and do the “Hey, look, everyone, we’re married!”. A celebration and marking of the marriage. It’s also Louis’s birthday. It was his idea to have the celebration on this day, because his birthday means little or nothing to him now (no wonder, after all this time) but it means something to me, so he thought it’d be a good idea to make it a day special for both of us in the here-and-now.

These are our wedding outfits. The background’s the ballroom at Fontainebleau, not our place. I didn’t have any shots that even vaguely resembled our home when I made this pic, and Fontainebleau being Louis’s birthplace (plus THE most gorgeous palace I’ve ever visited), it seemed an apt choice.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Ah, I was mixing up jealous conure with her, I think.

I’m sorry for your loss.

emilygoddess
7 years ago

Thanks everyone. That shit just lingers in my mind and pops out from time to time, like the world’s worst jack-in-the-box. It was a real question at the time, but my partner took me to dinner and I feel much less terrible now.

Auggz, I’m sorry about your birdie, but right there with you on old age being the best way for them to go. My beloved kitty is 17, and although I worry about her dying, I also know it’ll be because she had a long life, full of love and scritches.

Do you have pictures? I love budgies <3

Ally S
7 years ago

I’m sorry to hear that, auggz. :<

SittieKitty
7 years ago

Life is miserable. I am sick. Why doesn’t my brain work?

kittehserf
7 years ago

auggz – it worked. She was so pretty!

cloudiah
7 years ago

Auggz, sorry about your bird. Hugs to you, and more hugs to SittieKitty as well!

cloudiah
7 years ago

Also, congrats to Kittehs and her regal dude.

Ally S
7 years ago

That’s a lovely bird, auggz! I like the blue and white.

Fade
7 years ago

@auggzilliary

your bird is so cute. I’m sorry for your loss.

@Sittiekitty

My thoughts half of the time atm. (My brain is screwing with me too atm). Do you feel like explaining what’s wrong (ignore this if you don’t)? Or do you not know?

@Kittehsert

Happy anniversary!

@Everyone who responded to the wheelchair access yay thing

Yeah, I love it. It’s got the good side that since I’m living in an apartment, it didn’t cost us money, since the apartment normally provides accommodations to it’s residents. (though we would’ve been extra screwed if they’ said now)

kittehserf
7 years ago

Thanks, cloudiah, Fade!

I asked Louis this morning what he thought of my “catipalist economy” comment. His reaction was one of those “if you roll your eyes any harder they’ll fall out” looks. 😉

Unimaginative
Unimaginative
7 years ago

One small mercy: at least it’s not food poisoning, it’s too soon if you were just eating the stuff at the time.

I’ve had food poisoning manifest within an hour of finishing a meal, so it still could be. I also get nauseated and, um, shall we say “loose” when I’m stressed and anxious, so it could be that too. Or a hideous combination of the two.

Wow, everybody seems to be having a rough day (or night). Hugs and internet cookies to anyone who wants them. And Ally, just about every educational institution has a counselling department that’s free to students. Take advantage, even if it’s only to have a safe person to vent to. Having a horrible home-life, even when due to roommates who *aren’t* your parents, sucks up a LOT of mental and emotional energy that you need to get through your classes, and develop your social skills/life/persona.

I ended up turning my plums into cake instead of pickling them. They’d grown wizened and invaded by fruit flies. The cake was delicious, and I miss it. And I just realized that my theatre tickets (for which my date jammed out and I couldn’t find a replacement on short notice) are for tonight, and the show started 15 minutes ago. DAMNIT! Perhaps I’ll make some in-person cookies.

kittehserf
7 years ago

Unimaginative – ah, I thought Ally started vomiting while she was eating the stuff. Yeah, an hour would be ample to make your stomach go, especially while stressed.

TMI innard reacting to stress:

I get the instant diarrhoea reaction, too. As in, within five minutes. Vomiting doesn’t happen often, thank goodness, and the CBT sessions I had with a psychologist a while back helped me get to an “Okay, adrenal system is going to do its thing, vomiting itself isn’t such a problem and the stomach will feel better afterward” stage, instead of the vomiting adding to the stress.

I’m pretty sure I have irritable bowel syndrome.

SittieKitty
7 years ago

Fade,

Bipolar coming crashing down and I’m sick so that’s not helping, and I’m like half anxious about being reminded about an abusive ex because of a client at work who really reminds me of him so fml about that because I can’t get away from it, and sick = brain fuzzy as well, and having fuzzy brain means I can’t figure out what to do for coping strategies – usually writing and/or reading and/or art helps, but when fuzzy brain happens no creativity happens so I’m stuck in a awful grey hole without any way to get out and no colours to paint it. Um… yeah.

SittieKitty
7 years ago

Also, I don’t deal with anxiety well, because it’s a really new sensation for me. I’ve never had anxiety before, so when it first started last year I wasn’t even sure wtf I was feeling. Now I know but I’ve no ability to deal with it because it’s so new I haven’t developed any ways to do so/any understanding of it… And it’s not like an overwhelming anxiety, I don’t panic and it doesn’t escalate, it just sits static at the bottom of my stomach and back of my throat and tries to slowly kill me (at least, that’s what it feels like).

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