Long Weekend Open Thread
Like a lot of people in the US of A, I am taking a long weekend. Posting may be a little light for a bit. So here’s an open thread for everyone else taking a long weekend. Or not. Use this thread for anything that’s not personal. Like misogyny, politics, kitties, you know the drill. (Though kitties are welcome in all threads, of course.)
I am hoping my long weekend turns out a bit better than that of the people in the Australian movie of that name from 1978, which I keep meaning to see. Apparently their little beach vacation doesn’t go so well, and they are attacked by … nature? At one point, I believe, they face off against an enraged dugong. (No, really.) The movie was recently remade, but apparently the remake wasn’t as good.
Stay tuned for more reviews of movies I haven’t seen and that I’m just giving vague impressions of based on things I’ve heard somewhere.
Posted on July 5, 2013, in off topic, open thread. Bookmark the permalink. 1,365 Comments.
On the misogyny of geek culture: I was never deep into anything geeky aside from maybe music at one point in my teens, so you can imagine my surprise at suddenly being tossed into an environment where geek culture reigns supreme. I’m trying to come to grips with it but certain aspects of it really creeps me out. I guess I’m lucky in that until now I very rarely ran into the sort of casual misogyny I’m seeing among a crowd that includes gamers and comic book collectors and anime and sci fi enthusiasts. The only charitable reading I can come up with is that their general social awkwardness is behind the animosity but maybe I’m giving them too much credit. I’m really just baffled.
I hate how anime culture has Lolita* and shota stuff… It’s really fucking creepy.
*the other kind of Lolita… The bad one…
Geeky misogynist 1: I’m tired of all these women invading our spaces. They’re just pretending to like sci fi stuff to impress men and get attention! Let’s be rude to them until they take the hint and go away.
Geeky misogynist 2: Look around here, there are barely any women. This sucks!
Geeky misogynist 1: I guess women just aren’t into geek culture.
Geeky misogynist 2: I blame feminists.
Also, I’ve been getting into knitting again. I have this problem where on the first row of knitting, it will get super loose and its really really fucking annoying when knitting in a circle.
@thebionicmommy
Exactly the same reactions I’ve seen to women entering science in higher numbers. They really do try to make it so miserable for you that you want to leave.
I was literally told by males in my department that to improve myself as a person and be “less selfish” I needed to 1) take up knitting, and 2) have a baby (I was told I’d see the error of my childish ways soon)… I was also bullied relentlessly when I put my mind to it and did decently at anything, to the point where it became almost impossible to concentrate (one of the common side effects of bullying, along with anxiety and a bunch of other symptoms), then was chided for not focusing enough. If I ignored it all, I was told I was being too timid and weak. If I stuck up for myself, I was being an egotistical bitch.
Basically I’ve been put through a gauntlet of double binds since I went into science. I guess they figure if they’re rude and abusive enough to me I’ll suddenly stop wanting to succeed in science, see the error of my ways, and decide it’s best if I just give up and take up my rightful role– barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen darning socks and eating bon bons. Not happening!
@anadiomene122
GOd, that sucks :( Jedi hugs if you want them.
Thanks, Marie. :) I love the sense of humor here and the fact that you guys make me laugh about this stuff. Don’t want to gunk up this thread with personal problems, but it’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who experiences this stuff. I feel like I’m being invalidated and told that my reality doesn’t exist daily. Draining.
Holy shit, that Popehat thread is amazing. Brandon 2.0 came right away with his bullshit–yet another dude who puts the onus on women to deal with their harassment, how novel. Haven’t gotten to Pecunium’s takedowns yet, but I’m getting the popcorn ready.
I bet he’s another one who thinks we needs guys like him as allies. No, I like my allies less invested in preserving the status quo, thanks.
God that’s horrible anadiomene,
I’ve been told I’m weird and mean for not wanting kids. Usually when people ask how many I plan in having and I say none, over half of their reactions are in total shock.
WHAT THE WHAT?! I bet they would shit blue fire if someone told them that. Fuck those guys, kick ass. HAVE A BABY… I could power a city right now with the rage that kind of bullshit makes me feel. I’m sure their knitting, baby making wives are really fucking happy with the retrograde jags they married.
I’m sorry this is happening to you.
hellkell: I bet he’s another one who thinks we needs guys like him as allies. No, I like my allies less invested in preserving the status quo, thanks.
He does. And those who disagreed with him, soured him on the entire idea, so it it’s not fixed we know we can only blame ourselves for driving away the good guys who will save us.
He got told what a steaming pile that was.
Sleep has been good. When I woke up I realised there were some patterns to his shit: So long as it was only one person, he’d deny and gaslight. When it was more than one, he’d make an excuse; usually one about “heat of the moment”, and gaslight that (I saw his attack on the rape victim again, and he said it was because he was upset at being called a rape apologist, but the actual timeline shows him talking about it, and defending his asshole ways, quite calmly, well before he got called on it in a way he couldn’t dodge so well.
He’s an abusive personality. Being tired didn’t help.
By now it ought to be closed, and I can probably go see how it ended, though that’s likely to be rage inducing. There was lots of passive aggressive lying.
He is quite the shitstain. I hope he falls face first into all the Legos.
Knit and have a baby? Oh My Fucking God.
That sucks. Hugs.
Oh… as regards education. I’ve never finished my degree, so technically I’m only a HS graduate. (yes, I have more college credits than is believable, but they aren’t all in the right ticky boxes. I think I got an education, instead of a diploma).
“Oh… as regards education. I’ve never finished my degree, so technically I’m only a HS graduate. (yes, I have more college credits than is believable, but they aren’t all in the right ticky boxes. I think I got an education, instead of a diploma).”
I probably end up going that way as well. I’ve done two years of community college, and I’m grateful for that, but going to university to finish my B.A. isn’t fucking worth it if it means two more years of being monitored by my conservative elders. If my father can drive all the way from San Jose, CA to Boulder, CO in order to walk up to my older sister and tell her that she must stop having a boyfriend and find someone to marry, he will surely be willing to go as far if I move to Santa Cruz and ask him to leave me alone after coming out to him. Not even distance deters him from trying to have as much control over his children as possible.
I can always go later. It’s not like I’m a failure at life if I delay university for a few more years.
Correction: I can always go later if I think I need to. I apologize for sounding like I was passing a judgment on people who don’t finish their degrees.
My wife and I are very similar – I did finally focus enough to complete a degree (albeit well after my thirtieth birthday), but she still hasn’t made it over that particular finishing line, even though she’s more than bright enough. But although I was a dropout first time round, it wasn’t for the usual reasons: I practically lived in the university library, reading voraciously round the clock – it’s just that most of the stuff that I read was only tangentially related to my degree at best.
Incidentally, she’s got a science-research-related job interview later this week. She’s convinced that it’s already been earmarked for a particular individual (they’re asking for a somewhat unusual set of skills, which she coincidentally happens to possess), but she was pleasantly surprised to get shortlisted after convincing herself that her lack of a degree might be an insuperable barrier. But I’d have thought that sixteen years’ experience in precisely the right medical field should count for something.
B 2.0 revealed himself quite nicely in one of his walls o’ text (somebody teach the fool how to quote, yo) and summed up pretty much MRA/sexist douchnugget’s problem with women:
It so perfectly encapsulates them.
Lol. Yeah! Damn those individuals, acting all individually and not monolithic in their needs and desires! It’d be so much easier for me if they all just acted the same! Then we could make rules about what is and isn’t going to get me laid.
“yes, I have more college credits than is believable, but they aren’t all in the right ticky boxes. I think I got an education, instead of a diploma”
Ding ding ding, we have a winner! I’m about a semester shy of a BS, and fuck my psych’s perpetual “you could surely find the money to finish” — 1) no I can’t; 2) wtf difference does it make when I’m totally fucking nuts; 3) so what? I need an upper level psych credit, a couple gen eds that I was told fulfilled multiple requirements and didn’t (as in, I already learned the topic, just not officially enough)…
But I certainly got an education *side eyes mac* and you call get to benefit from it :)
My drawing books are coming in the mail! I already got my nook charger and a little book called Cultures of Solidarity. (Short review: very dry but the subject matter carries the whole thing by itself. I read the whole book in two sittings)
Oh, and I’m learning how to drive. I kinda hate it, don’t see what the hullabaloo is all about.
My god, it’s still going.Thank got for sleep. I am much clearer than I was.
Argenti: I have something like 72 semester hours, and 100+ quarter hours.
Yay for other awesome people who didn’t finish their degree!
Technically, I’m just a few classes short of an associate’s, but those ones tend to be the classes that I’ve already failed at least once before, if not multiple times. DAMN YOU, ENGLISH 101!
@LBT
More yay! Sorry for not responding sooner, it’s been a busy weekend, but that sounds awesome!
Pecunium — I’ve only got a handful more than you then, and one is a math course I got a C in because I only snowed up for the tests and financial math and I aren’t quite so friendly. (It was weird, I totally could’ve skipped statistics, but the prof was engaging and, um, the girl who asked me to help her not fail was cute)
“I am much clearer than I was.”
Curse you and your AC! Real feel here is 103°! My mac is all cranky, I’m all cranky, both furry ones are making like long puddles (seriously, how does a tabby manage to stretch to 2’?)
I think if it’s all converted to quarter hours I have a total of 210, or so.
@gillyrosebee (and everyone else, from page 8)–
I’ve got this almond scented bar soap from our local organic co-op for every day use. Sappo Hill. My beloved is not allowed to use it because he uses a literal brush that just wastes soap so quickly. I liked the oatmeal cookie too (with real oats!), but it smelled like the breakfast I had just finished eating moments before. Unnerving.
Dr. Bronner’s Peppermint liquid soap in the summer works great for mosquito bitten skin because everything tingles. The mint also makes me cool in all the right places so that I don’t sweat for the first 2 hours or so afterward. hellkell’s comment about watching that tingling is true, make sure to rinse quickly.
Also, you can use it for washing all kinds of crap. Combined with vinegar, it works as an excellent kitchen counter cleaner. Cleaning used water bottles (even with iced tea or milk in them) works great, because you can smell when it has rinsed clean out. Ally S, LBT, and Argenti seem to like Dr. Bronner’s too.
Organic soap, and the kind I used as a kid (Zest Aqua) are the only kinds I can deal with on my skin without the smell overwhelming me and making me sick. It was pretty cool when I found out organic soaps worked for me because my beloved and I could finally smell different.
@Argenti and pecunium
Re: Germany / Deutchland (page 9). I never understood why English speakers had to make up different names for other people’s countries. I believe Japan is Nippon or Nihon to residents. And every time I hear about a country changing it’s name, I wonder if we just made up a new one for them semi-related to their actual new name.
—
I know it’s was a while ago (page 11), but I also appreciate the moderation (and hope for a ban) of OF. That was horrible and I’m sorry.
—
Also, CassandraSays, I liked the “talking about” vs. “talking to” comment.
@Kittehserf
I really liked Broadchurch. David Tennant and Olivia Colman are great.
@J
My beloved hates to drive too! (I cannot drive at all, and haven’t tried since at least 2004).
—
I finally caught up, just in time to go to bed. Take care, everyone.
Re: Germany / Deutchland (page 9). I never understood why English speakers had to make up different names for other people’s countries.
Everyone does it. e.g. Germany is Allemagne in French.Greece calls itself Elleniki, in German it’s Griechenland
Germany calls the Capital of Russia, Moskau, when in Russian it’s Moskva.
Some of it is that some sounds don’t exist in other languages. Some of it is that we get names from the past (no one knows where “Greece” comes from, save that the Romans used it). Some of it is that one group has a name for it, and they share it, and it’s not the name the actual people who live there call it, but by the time it’s found out, it’s too late.
Thanks, T7G, I’m thinking I’ll have a look at it. :)
That popehat thread … the minute the men in there start rules lawyering you know they’re there in bad faith. They’re quite likely harassers themselves, but even if they’re not, they’re going on the assumption that women only exist to be hit on; that there’s no reason to talk to a woman if you’re not trying to get sex from her (yes I phrased that deliberately). Their whining about not knowing what’s welcome and how haaaarrrd it is and how they won’t be allowed to talk to women at all could be solved very simply:
1. Assume women aren’t there for sex and don’t want to be hit on.
2. Don’t hit on them.
3. Repeat.
But of course since they’re not talking in good faith, it wouldn’t work to tell them that, because womenthings don’t have any other reason to be out in public, do they?
There was one other there who I really side-eyed – name started with L – who had me this close to thinking “cool story, bro” despite how horrific the experience he described was.
@hellkell, good call on the Pillock pretending to be an ally and then getting the sulks when people don’t want to let him be the boss.
kittehs: It was a comment to that person which I flew past Argenti before I made it.
I think I can actually call a victory on Pollock. He’s pretty much quite the field, with the usual sorts of, “I see that you can never accept that anyone who disagrees with you isn’t categorically wrong in all particulars”.
I think it was my dissecting his grammar which did it. He has the, “you misunderstood me/you misquoted me/you took that out of context” thing.
So I broke down exactly what he said, and diagrammed it, and laid out his argument, and what it meant, and why what I said wasn’t wrong.
And someone else did that to his PTSD shit.
And he’s a lot less effective now.
Sleep helped a lot. Made it easier to see what the real flaw in his “plan” is.
“Give all agency to the men” married to, “blame the women if they are abused”.
Under the cover of, “Vigorous reporting”, married to, “thorough investigation”. When the agency isn’t in the hands of the victim, how is that gonna go?
“There was one other there who I really side-eyed – name started with L – who had me this close to thinking “cool story, bro” despite how horrific the experience he described was.”
Yeaaah, I replied to pecunium’s email assuming it was true, because doubting people saying they’ve been assaulted isn’t really my thing. But his statistically improbable experience isn’t a get out of assholery free card. Like, I’m sorry that happened to you, but the rest of your comment in based on so many assumptions I want to blow on your house of cards.
I just got to the part where Pillock feels bullied and won’t stand for it (after having the gall to tell rape victims the same thing OF did yesterday–is there something in the water). Can someone hand me my eyes? They just rolled out of my head.
Are they spinning rainbows? If so one of them landed inside my mac’s screen!
Hee, my mac does the same thing now, it’s old and cranky.
Did you say it was 103 there? Same here, if I could send you central AC, I would.
BELKAR!! Thanks guys, now I’ve been sucked in by my favorite no-longer-quite-evil halfling (he sorta inherented a cat, having a small living creature relying on him has made him less evil [he's still evil])
Speaking of Belkar, Banjo the Clown has 24 followers among us, maybe Elan can dual class in cleric after all!
@pecunium: It’s actually Ellada (the d is pronounced like the th in the). I don’t think it’s very clear when the term Ellhnes (elines) first came to mean all the Greek people. In Homer’s time it referred to a particular tribe. There is also the term Romios which paradoxically came to refer to Greeks. This has to do with the fact that the Eastern Roman Empire (known as the Byzantine Empire only later) was largely consisted of Greece. This term though has fallen out of use in modern times along with the term Greek.
Real feel 100 currently (mac enclosure base is 113, CPU 171 [that's reasonable, 113 is not]), actual temp is uh…91. I’m almost afraid to check the tank temp.
Oh look, I can’t. Their thermometer tops at 90. It’s too hot for the thermometer >.<
I can’t believe that Pillock toolshed posted the lyrics to The Animals “Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood” as an argument bolster. That kind of shit should make your computer blow sky high next time you try to post.
I should have known better than to go read that popehat thread, but I was too itchy (ant bites) to sleep and too groggy from the Benadryl to write anything where proper grammar and spelling were necessary, so I just decided to read around a while.
And then the sun came up. O.o
@anadiomene122 Sadly, I have had similar experiences in my first career, and you have all my sympathies.
And on the subject of knitting
DPNs or magic loop? What method are you using to cast on?
Hey, it’s not super on-topic, but I’m getting malware reports from Avast for various objects around the site; I rather suspect that someone’s doing some false reporting, just sayin’.
I wonder if anyone who checked Banjo actually doesn’t read Order of the Stick and just checked it because they thought it sounded funny. (I would respect that.)
Gillyrosebee, um idk. It’s basically where I twist the thread around my finger and slide it on my needle so it’s a loop.
Gillyrosebee, what’s the best way to cast on to not get that annoying loose first row?
“I wonder if anyone who checked Banjo actually doesn’t read Order of the Stick and just checked it because they thought it sounded funny. (I would respect that.)”
I know there are at least a handful of OoTS fans around here, and out of 1640 replies 24 doesn’t seem unreasonable. But hey, Elan made him from a bard’s sense of what’s “proper”, of course it’s funny!
Oh yeah, I had a dream that was really vivid. The survey was completely done but David died so it didn’t matter.
Also I stole some scarf that made me into a god. I tried to tell my friend since I was confused, and he just high fived me and said “niiice”.
Okay, auggziliary, there’s probably where your problem is. That’s the most basic, but also the hardest to control cast on there is.
There are lots of good cast ons, and usually you choose based on what the next few rows are going to be. My favorite super basic, good for almost anything method (not as great for socks as it stretches but there are stretchier ones!) is the long tail cast on. It has a few downsides, as you have to start by estimating the yarn you will need and pulling it off the ball before you can make your initial slip knot (thus producing the long tail of yarn you will need for the takeup yarn), and add more yarn if you didn’t pull enough, you just have to pull out your loops and start again. But it is easy enough to get the tension constant, it is decently stretchy, and once you are used to the motion, it’s pretty easy to do it almost mindlessly so that you can cast on lots of stitches while watching tv, for example. It’s the first thing I usually teach to anyone who has asked me to teach them to knit.
Of all the instructional videos I’ve seen, this one is the clearest
Wow, so glad I missed that popehat thread. Catching up!
RE: pecunium
It’d be quite the coolness to meet up, and I’ll be in NYC either at the very start of October, or anytime in September. Which leads me to some of the other things.
RE: emilygoddess
I actually make take you up on that. September is a tricky time for me, because I will lose my housing, and with the weather the way it’s been, I don’t dare try and move back into my closet. However, I can’t embark on the trip, because at the end of September is the Mass Indy Comics Expo, which I’ve always done well at, and I need the money. So I actually AM in need of connections with the work co-ops in town. Housing has had my sanity healing at an amazing pace (for me) so I can likely do the work. (And I dread the idea of the shelter system; they are NOT known for being nice to trans people, and it sounds horrific.) Thanks for the wiki; I shall look at it after I post this.
RE: Fibinachi
That would be INCREDIBLY useful. I’ll fire you an email.
RE: MordsithJ
SO using this. Thank you very much!
And in honor of all the rape apologist assholes, I repost my FEMINIST METAL!
Gillyrosebee, thanks! Ill try that next time.
I am making socks btw. They’re going to be the long kind, at least knee length.
@auggz, have you tried cable cast on? That’s what I do and it doesn’t come out all loose. It’s jut putting the needle between the loops instead of through them when making a new stitch.
I found something gratifying last night. I was reading a history of knitting and it mentioned the different styles or methods around the world. The Eastern (by which I think they meant at least Turkey onward) is crossed stitches, aka knitting into the back of the stitch. Now that’s how I knit ‘cos I never knew there was any other way, and it seems much more intuitive to go for the main gap instead of wending around the front of the wool. I shall now say I knit that way instead of “welp, I don’t do plain stitches properly”.
Course it is slightly mucked up by the fact that I’m using English method of having the yarn in the right hand. ;)
Say, knitters, is anyone here on Ravelry? I know Kiwi girl is and I think one other Manboobzer might be.
@hellkell – it’s even worse with that Pillock than with the Obtuse Fistula, because he was blaming someone who was raped as a child for not reporting.
@Argenti – “Yeaaah, I replied to pecunium’s email assuming it was true, because doubting people saying they’ve been assaulted isn’t really my thing. But his statistically improbable experience isn’t a get out of assholery free card. Like, I’m sorry that happened to you, but the rest of your comment in based on so many assumptions I want to blow on your house of cards.”
Pretty much my take on it. Not to mention that horrific attack was not commited by a woman, it was all down to men, but it’s not men en masse he’s blaming for it.
Kittehserf, my username for ravelry is auggziliary.
@LBT
“And in honor of all the rape apologist assholes, I repost my FEMINIST METAL!”
…You’re my hero for sharing this. I’m an avid metalhead, and I never knew feminist metal even existed. =O
RE: Ally S
That’s actually the only metal song I know. <.< Soooo yeah. At least it's a good one?
ah-HAH! Then what you want is actually Jeny’s surprisingly stretchy cast on.
I have never found anything more comfortable for socks and mittens. Endless stretch and an attractive presentation for ribbing.
@Kittehs Round these parts that’s called ‘twisted stitch’ and it’s considered an advanced technique! It also makes up a lovely fabric, with an extra linear detail that I’ve always liked.
In unrelated news, I just poured my first batch of peppermint soap into the mold and now the house is full of the scent. Housemate thinks that this is good justification to have mint chocolate chip ice cream for dinner!
Well, for the only metal song you know, you sure picked a good one. =P
@gillyrosebee – hey, cool, I haz advanced skillz!
It does give a very linear look, doesn’t it? Almost like a half-ribbed effect.
Gyech. Much as stable housing has been a godsend for me, I’m feeling a bit of anxiety.
My mental health has been going up, which is fantastic. But now I’m starting to feel the pressure to earn more money. I feel bad that my roommates are coughing up more so I can stay, even though I know it’s just through next month. I already have a pet-sitting gig later this month for $250, my commissions are open, we’re pushing through our emergency aid app… I just keep feeling like I should be doing more, and I feel guilty for saving money for my trip while my housemates help support me.
I don’t like feeling this dependent on people, but I’m also terrified that taking on more steady paying work will just send me straight back into the tailspin I 2010-2012 in.
I dunno. Being poor sucks, and I just feel parasitic right now.
Gillyrosebee, well… I just started doing cable and I’m already 40 stitches in, so ill have to try that for another project. I’m too lazy to restart this…
LBT, you’re NOT being parasitic – d’you think your friends would have offered the space if they felt that way?
Welp, I just finished the popehat thread. 900-odd comments (hahahahaHA Manboobz comments get longer than that, and this one’s heading for the 1000 mark!).
That Pillock character … I wonder about the comment SallyStrange made at the end, about how he’s likely a harasser himself, ‘cos he’s so invested in making things easier for them, blaming women regardless of our response to harassment, blaming children for being raped, gaslighting everyone, agreeing that a woman who’s dressed up but not “putting out” (gods I hate that term) is “not playing fair”… fucking misogynistic shit from him all the way through. And like Pecunium said, that slimy, pompous way of presenting it all. He manages to pretend he’s just trying to find SOLUTIONS and wanted to be an ally until people were so mean to him. Maybe he’s not a harasser, but I’d say he’s at least a wannabe, with that attitude. Consent is a given and if women don’t want it, all they have to do is say No, in writing, in triplicate. Otherwise, well, they didn’t really say no and it’s none of his business if someone’s being assaulted in front of him, amirite?
RE: Kittehserf
*sigh* I know. I still feel bad though. Me and Sneak are gonna go put up pet-sitting flyers, try and rustle up some more $$$. We’ll be back later.
God, I want to make my life where I need to deal less and less with freakin’ money. I swear, even when I had plenty, I couldn’t stop thinking about it!
Try not to feel too bad. It’s natural, but you most certainly are not parasitic; it’s awesome your roommates actually care. Try thinking of it as something wonderful they’re doing for you rather than something bad you’re doing to them? You are a lovely person, and people.
Kittehs: Yeah, I think he’s an abuser (and if not yet, he’s 85% there) too. Otherwise, I just don’t get why he’d choose this hill to die on.
RE: hrovitnir
Thanks. I actually went and talked to them, and they reassured me that they cared very much about us and that we could totally stay, it was okay. I think I just overdid future planning and got overwhelmed. I feel calmer now and think I’ll take a rest from planning.
People sometimes praise my social skills; the way I see it, I’m trying to make up for using people’s resources by being as pleasant and interesting to be around as possible. If I can’t pay someone back in money, at least I can pay them back in EXPERIENCE.
That’s great. Make sure you look after yourself too! You don’t want to drain yourself making yourself pleasant to everybody. I hope everything goes as smoothly as possible.
I had a last comment, which was too late. Basically his final contention is that I’m a bully, because I say I know better then he what he believes.
This is, of course, a misrepresentation. I don’t think I ever claimed to know what he thought, only what he said.
I even went to the effort to show exactly what it was about his presentation which led to my conclusions. It was, at that point, he stopped trying to make new arguments, and just said, “you’re nothing but a pompous blowhard meanie-mcmeanerson!
So, either James Pollock is a lousy communicator, or there was a large group of people who just chose to pretend they all saw the same problematic arguments, and implications.
I know which seems more likely.
There is a third option, less kind to him: He might have been using complexity of presentation (e.g. being confusing) to provide an escape hatch if he was caught out. This is most common when someone want’s to be able to back away from a controversial/questionable claim, or argument.
I don’t really think this was the case, because his core positions were pretty steady (and they were independent of his gaslighting: that was done when he attacked someone, and got caught out: He wasn’t willing to own his shit).
So yeah, he was shit at making himself understood. I also think he was hoping he could retcon his asshole shit, with the equivocations (e.g. the, “it’s unfair if she gets us all turned on with sexy clothes and won’t have sex with us).
But he had the chance, more than twice, to actually retract the statement, and he didn’t. He just pretended he hadn’t made it.
So… not an honest actor. I don’t know if he’s a harasser, but he’s got some red flags; and he’s also got some red flags for abuse. I wish I thought he was really going to stop advocating for his ideas on how to deal with harassment.
LBT, remember also that when you are in need and other people can (and want to) help you, it is a gift to them as well to accept their help (granted, so long as they aren’t doing it to be manipulative). I’ve been in a place to help others before and it made me very happy to be able to do so. Right now I am in a place where I am accepting help from others, and that doesn’t feel right because we are socialized to think that accepting help (framed as ‘charity’) is less worthy than being able to give it. But both are sides of being part of a community.
So done with 152 cable cast offs. There’s 38 per needle, with 4 needles.
That took forever…
You’re knitting the four double-pointed method, auggz? I’ve never been game to try that. I drop stitches easily enough when there’s only one point per needle (so far I’ve had to do threee repairs to the tunic and I’m only about 16 cm into it. ARRRGH!
Do you ever use circular needles? I tried doing a cowl on them a while back but couldn’t keep it straight. I’ve used them for adding a brim to a finished beret, but that’s all.
Pecunium – yeah, it’s a curious mixture, isn’t it? If he’s just a lousy communicator, why’d he double down or try to weasel out of things every time? I get the feeling the best one could say of him is that he really doesn’t see what a fucking entitled shit he is. Privilege on legs, and he doesn’t see it. That, or he is at least borderline harasser/abuser (especially because of the gaslighting efforts), in which case he’s still a lousy communicator, because his attempts to come across as totes reasonable didn’t fool anyone. The only people on the thread supporting him were taking the same victim-blaming poor menz approach.
I wonder if that Jeremy creep would be happy if some woman did take his advice and carry a pistol – and USE it on him when he harassed her, as I’m pretty confident he does. Mr “anything but a gun in my face is a yes” (in summary) doesn’t sound like someone remotely trustworthy.