Long Weekend Open Thread
Like a lot of people in the US of A, I am taking a long weekend. Posting may be a little light for a bit. So here’s an open thread for everyone else taking a long weekend. Or not. Use this thread for anything that’s not personal. Like misogyny, politics, kitties, you know the drill. (Though kitties are welcome in all threads, of course.)
I am hoping my long weekend turns out a bit better than that of the people in the Australian movie of that name from 1978, which I keep meaning to see. Apparently their little beach vacation doesn’t go so well, and they are attacked by … nature? At one point, I believe, they face off against an enraged dugong. (No, really.) The movie was recently remade, but apparently the remake wasn’t as good.
Stay tuned for more reviews of movies I haven’t seen and that I’m just giving vague impressions of based on things I’ve heard somewhere.
Posted on July 5, 2013, in off topic, open thread. Bookmark the permalink. 1,365 Comments.
Cassandra – Yup, they’d look great in those combinations. The leggings are the feature pieces.
I think the skulls would look great with a solid black (even red) top.
And btw, I never finished college, technically speaking my highest education COMPLETED is HS // secondary.
FWIW, MordsithJ, I don’t think you should feel like you’re out of your depth here, and if the conversation is making you feel that way because it’s getting jargon-heavy then you should feel free to ask people to knock it off. I don’t want this to be a space where people feel like they need a university education to participate, and I don’t think most other people do either.
Well, to be honest those aren’t really my strong suits. Blame it on my ADD, baby.
Ack, is my stat talk getting too complex? I wrote up a math free words only crash course, I can link now if you want? (Seriously, drunk pecunium said it made sense, but I’m totally willing to edit // add to it, y’all want it?)
I know this was a while ago, but LBT, I’ve had two Swiss Army Knives in my life, and the screwdriver on each busted PDQ. I don’t think they’re actually built very solidly.
I’d suggest carrying a backup knife, too, in case the first one gets lost, stolen, breaks, or dulls.
As far as fire lighters go, little butane cigarette lighters are available practically everywhere, and they’re cheap, but I think they’re flimsy.
Have you thought of a high-visibility vest or poncho for when you’re hitching or just walking along a road?
I don’t think east-central Tennessee is good for public transportation (as part of a general discussion on PT). Someone did come into my office to see about getting an appointment with my boss, and told me he’d hitchhiked across a couple of counties to do it. Knoxville and Nashville have buses, but the smaller cities don’t, they just have taxis. And most places aren’t exactly walkable cities, although I’m told there are Oak Ridgers who can remember back to when we didn’t have sidewalks.
RE: CassandraSays and MordsithJ
I certainly don’t. I worry sometimes; I try to keep jargon out of my talk, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I slip. Keep me honest, okay? If I’m talking in such a way that I’m not communicating, I’m doing it wrong.
Funny is also always acceptable, as are cats ^.^
Also, not lying or manipulating people. Going to guess those two you can handle (and cats, and cats and printers)
LBT, she isn’t a zookeeper exactly, and not a vet, but she basically controls when vets get hired and such. She showed us the equipment she used too. I’m sorry I don’t know her jobs name. I know she basically took classes that zoo keepers took in college, and she was a zoo keeper at a few other zoos before.
The giraffe barn is awesome. To check their heads they have a balcony thing(idk my architecture terms) that you up to. The giraffes will hang their head over to get checked. They’ll get impatient when waiting for their checkups, so they’ll breathe on the vets’ backs while they’re working on another giraffe.
Kitten serf, yes that was it.
Oh I also saw a prehensile tailed porcupine. I didn’t pet it for obvious reasons. In case you don’t know what that is:
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=eSSIN1AWnqY&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DeSSIN1AWnq
They look like real life slowpokes.
I saw some non exotic animals, like baby goats, a chicken, and one of those giant rabbits. The baby goats were adorable, they act just like puppies, they even wag their tails and put their hooves on your lap when you’re standing.
@BS:
“It’s also funny that this dude thinks that puas will leave alone married women, or women who don’t go to nightclubs. They have entire programs that are supposed to teach guys to hit on women outside of nightclub environments and probably many thousands of blog posts and forum threads where puas trade tips on how to hit on women online, at shopping malls, grocery stores, walking down the street, within their social circle, etc.”
O: This is absolutely true, except for the “hitting on married women” part, which I am not aware of and is not a part of my seduction community. Day Game, is indeed a very real thing.
“Likewise, they share tactics and lines and memorized scripts for hitting on women with boyfriends or husbands and trying to have sex with them.”
O: Such things can only work if the Women in question acede to it; moreover, it isn’t like the seduction community was the cause of infidelity. Moreover, I don’t know what they call them in the White community, but in the Black community, they call them “war councils” – groups of Black Women who gather to discuss relationship issuess and to trade tips and the like for the express purpose of getting into (or out of) the relationship they desire. Again, Women have been doing this forever. Why is it bad when the PUAs do it? Why not hold both equally to account?
“So yeah but no, doesn’t matter if a woman is taken, if she doesn’t go to nightclubs or bars, or for that matter if the pua even finds her attractive (since even a woman they’re not attracted to counts as “practice” to them), she’s still fair game to these douchebags.”
O: Women get hit on all the time by all kinds of guys, PUAs are just Johnny Come Latelys. Why single them out in light of these facts?
@Pecinium:
“Daygame, right?”
O: Correct.
“how laundromats are great places, and dog parks, and waiting in line at the DMV (she can’t get away… captive audience).”
O: LOL. Not quite. But yes, pretty much anywhere Men and Women get together, there too shall you find Game…
“Yeah, it’s all about the “offer, and if she says no, ‘just bounce’”,”
O: That’s the way I do it…
O.
Cassandra, do you like coat-dresses? I think the skull leggings would look great with one in black.
The feeling-like-you-need-uni thing was what made me hesitate about delurking, back in the day. Not in a sense of being actively sneered at, just that I’d be out of my depth and maybe not that welcome because of it. It’s very nice to see someone say straight out that that’s not the case, even knowing it long since.
RE: Argenti
Man, I went to GRAD SCHOOL and I can’t follow the stats talk. But then again, they are one part of my understanding that’s lacking. Never did get the hang of them. (Standards of deviation… *shudder*
RE: Falconer
Yeah, I probably ought to invest in something a bit tougher; one of my roommates busted my other one just uncorking a wine bottle. Useless! And I’m from Texas; I recall with dismay the awful, awful state of transportation there. If you didn’t have a car, you were sunk. *sigh* One way or another, I’m sure I’ll get where I need to be though.
As for high-visibility vest… I really hope I wouldn’t be walking or hitching on a road in the middle of the night! D: If I’m in that situation, getting hit is the least of my worries!
Argenti, I doubt there’s a language invented that would make me understand stats, lol! I quit maths the minute I was able to after barely scraping through four painful years in high school. Since I heard of dyscalculia I suspect I may have it; I sure have some of the symptoms.
@SittieKitty:
“lmao. This is quite possibly one of the most hilariously stupid things you’ve said yet. Very few people prosecute rape, let alone rapist wannabees like those who use Game. Go look at rape statistics, how many people a) report, b) prosecute, c) go to trial, and d) get convicted. It’s percents of percents. It’s minuscule. Prosecuting rape isn’t even worth the ordeal for many people. It sure as hell wasn’t for me. My ability to get away from my abuser was waaaay more important for me than throwing my life into shit for years having to relive my experiences and having to describe it over and over to people who don’t believe me, and to people who are trying to prove it didn’t happen. My safety and peace of mind was more important than trying to navigate the court system to get anything done – and it wouldn’t have gone that far, I’m 100% sure it wouldn’t have even gone to an arrest, let alone a trial and conviction.”
O: Then, I am sorry to inform you that because of your refusal to report it, that rapist has most likely gone on to reoffend; that is the pattern. If we want to reduce rapes, Women who have been attacked MUST come forward to report it. For my part I don’t want rapists in the camp. If they’ve committed a crime, I want them brought to justice.
Making the case that Women must come forward, could very well address some of the more egregious behavior in the pickup community too – yes?
O.
I love my housemate, really I do. We’ve been friends for going on two decades now, and when I needed a place to go he was totally there for me while my family was whistling and studying patterns in the clouds. And, full disclosure, as one of our trolls picked up on, he is indeed letting me use my ‘feminine wiles’ (specifically my construction and horticultural knowledge) to make my rent more affordable. Market rate is out of my league at the moment, especially as I try to get my business off the ground.
BUT
He does this thing where he mentions a project to me in abstract terms, like “wouldn’t it be a good idea to repoint and repaint the garage?” or “shouldn’t that rhododendron be completely reshaped?” or “do you think it would look better if that planter bed had a cleaner edge made of pressure treated 2x12s?” and generally I will agree that, yes, all of those things are not only highly desirable but eminently possible.
And then one fine Saturday afternoon, out of the clear blue with, he will come home and say, “so I have lumber and 6 cubic yards of new topsoil in my trunk, if we start now we should be able to be done by sundown!”
When I get done being tired, I am going to be so sore…
Well, I wasn’t thinking middle of the night so much as in the pouring rain.
NEWS FLASH
Tiny baby yawns.
Tiny.
Baby.
Yawns.
Cassandra, god I love those leggings.
My favorite animal was the tapir I think. The babies look like watermelons:
https://www.google.com/search?q=tapir+baby&oe=UTF-8&hl=en&client=safari&um=1&ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=Cb_YUeHqJIG29QS61oGoDQ&biw=1024&bih=672&sei=DL_YUe-IEI2c9QSnwIDYDA#biv=i%7C2%3Bd%7CU5KJM6Cb2VWibM%3A
Also the equipment they used on animals was cool. The elephant barn had a cage. It had steel bars that were like a foot in diameter.
Also the clouded leopard cubs were super adorable… They’re paws are so big.
I wish I could play with them, but they play bite, and their play bites are hard enough to send you to the hospital…
Did you literally just blame me for any future crimes he commits? Actually?? Fuck you. You can go to hell. He chooses to rape, any future rapes he commits is because of his actions and choices, not because of mine. You can go fuck yourself.
Fuck off with your attempted shaming, douchecanoe.
Daaaamn. The acceptance (here) versus education graph looks like a spider web, there’s no correlation, it isn’t an artifact of it not being linear, it just isn’t, any shape at all (I mean, shotguns produce more of a pattern than this)
RE: auggzilliary
Aw, that’s so cute! And interesting. Although I know I don’t have the training for zoo work, except for the most basic labor, I am curious about it. It seems very important work. The zoo I’m most familiar with was that one in Austin, which like I said, mostly had rescue animals. No giraffes, a saddening number of “it was so cute when it was little,” critters.
RE: college
Actually, one of my big beefs with a lot of the Internet activism scene is how it gabbles on and on in jargon, and just EXPECTS people to either look it up or GTFO. It’s very academic in its standpoint, and stupidly clueless in that it seems to just ASSUME people have nothing better to do all day than learn the niceties of AFAB/AMAB vs. FAAB/MAAB vs. CAFAB/CAMAB, and so on and so forth.
(Yes, I have seen those arguments. It was fascinating. And by fascinating, I mean Brandon.)
@SittieKitty: Yeah, I had to scrape my jaw off the floor.
And I hope you don’t mind me jumping in there. It just seemed to me that silence was tantamount to support.
@LBT:
Thank for taking the time out to write the comment you did. By all accounts your method has achieved the desired result and I wish you much happiness with it.
Thanks also for the kind words regarding Alaska, etc. Yea, RVs are nothing to sneeze at in terms of cost, but gosh, they’re really nice aren’t they? I was looking at some models a dealer had down in Texas, and it looked like a stateroom on the inside. Really, really nice. I’d like to make a 50 state tour of the country, spending a bit of time in each state, talking with people there, all colors, classes, genders, you name it. I believe that’s how real change happens, when different people sitdown and talk to each other.
O.
@ LBT
“Be glad you weren’t here for the days of B.”
Geez, B must have been horrible. Still, I wish I’d found you all earlier. The “Men’s Power” shit has always really pissed me off and made me sad. Then I found you guys. What a hilarious group of people who so adroitly harness the power of mockery to show how deeply pathetic these people are. Instead of being mad or sad, now I can laugh about it and almost feel sorry for them. (Well, when they aren’t making themselves the main subject of a thread that isn’t about them.)
@LBT: Okay, I guess AXAB means Assigned X At Birth (as opposed to X Assigned At Birth), but what’s the C stand for in the third set of terms?
(Probably something as plain as the nose on my face.)
I appreciate it Falconer. That was total bullshit
Oh, go fuck yourself. You have no idea what rape victims go through when they try to prosecute their assailants. And moreover, it’s the rapist’s fault for raping people, not the victim’s failure to report.
@Argenti
Okay, thanks for looking. Was just curious about it.
True story: I was over at some friends’ house and got in the middle of a conversation between spouses. I can’t even remember what it was about. The husband told me to stop white knighting.
I was kind of gobsmacked for a second. (Did I mention I’m not good with words? And yet my biggest hobby is basically improv theater with dice.)
And then he said he was teasing me, and I relaxed.
I’ve just emailed Dave about that, SittieKitty.
@LBT – “people have nothing better to do all day than learn the niceties of AFAB/AMAB vs. FAAB/MAAB vs. CAFAB/CAMAB, and so on and so forth.”
Yeah, my eyes tend to glaze over when the acronyms proliferate, regardless of the subject.
@Kristineedscats, hi, have you had your Official Welcome Package yet?
Falconer — coercively is the c.
And the footnotes are here — https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lN4Ub-WvYKaRaNrcBl1vIpb1fKeYSwZTkB5Ion-qfkU/mobilebasic
And totally optional, but the stats crash course is near the top and the closest it has to numbers is this —
“Standard deviation, also fairly simple to understand. The part you do need to know is that it’s a measure of how spread out the data is. Forty and sixty average to 50, so do 0 and 100, the later has a larger standard deviation.”
Simple to understand, calculating it *shudders, talks nice to excel*
I’m not even sorry I broke my promise to myself to not engage.
RE: Obsidian Files
Not cool, man. SO not cool.
And FYI, what you describe was why I eventually reported MY rapist. Guess what happened to him? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Because unfortunately, reported or not, that is what happens to most rapists in this country. Even when reported, they are very rarely convicted.
I agonized for years, worrying whether my rapist would go after another teenager, and whether it would be my fault if it was. I entertained some pretty irrational, awful fantasies back in the day, in the hopes I would prevent him ever harming another person. I was barely an adult, and my report went nowhere, and I found myself wondering whether murdering a human was an ethical activity, if it prevented him from raping anybody else.
It was a very dark, bad time in my life. And I hate that I was in a society that was so helpless to protect its children that even as a child myself, I felt responsible for others like me. (And I still had it great, compared to my mother. But that’s another story.)
You show a PITIABLE lack of understanding about how rape trials and convictions work in this country. Go do your damned homework and fuck off.
(Also, oh GOD WHY DID I LOOK UP RAPE CULTURE ON TUMBLR. WHY WAS I SO STUPID. I need to go pour bleach into my eye sockets now.)
MordsithJ — no problem, actually, I should do that with education versus class too, though I suspect I’ll get the same spider web (I switched it to curves instead of straight lines and it’s downright pretty, looks like one of the spirograph toys for kids)
Obsidian — the line, you are so fucking far over it with that shit. Know who’s to blame for rape? RAPISTS.
I fucking can’t. Somebody request data please. (Or provide photos of tiny baby yawns. Do they yawn in unison? Cuz that’d be so cute I’d melt)
@argenti: Thanks for the explication.
But isn’t there an element of coercion already inherent in AAB anyway?
I must admit, I talk about my kids as though they’re cis; but really, they’re four and a half months old, they haven’t developed a gender yet, and anyway, one gets odd looks when one talks about having a penis-person and a vagina-person.
Thanks Kitteh. I don’t even know what to do with that… it’s just such an awful thing to say to someone.
@Argenti: Sadly, the yawns are over so suddenly I haven’t even swiped into my smartphone by the time they’re done.
I haven’t noticed them yawning in sync, but sometimes they start fussing, or STOP fussing, in unison, and I don’t know which is creepier.
Now PUA dude? He’s out of his depth here, as his last comment about women reporting rape proved.
(Not that he hadn’t proved it already but seriously, damn that was ignorant.)
OF, taking over comment threads with endless tedious “discussion” of your pet topics, tedious.
But blaming a rape victim for zir rapists future actions?
I’m putting you on moderation, and won’t be letting through anything from you for 24 hours at least. Depending on how I’m feeling then, I may just make it a permaban.
Off to play some Avernum before bed.
Night, all!
Dave, THANK YOU.
“But isn’t there an element of coercion already inherent in AAB anyway?”
And therein lies the acronym debate!
Thank you David.
“(Also, oh GOD WHY DID I LOOK UP RAPE CULTURE ON TUMBLR. WHY WAS I SO STUPID. I need to go pour bleach into my eye sockets now.)”
I never bother venturing into Tumblr. Is there a lot of rape apologia there or something? That must be awful. X_X
RE: Falconer
Argenti beat me to it; the ‘C’ stands for ‘coercively.’ And THEN they started fighting over whether using the term ‘assigned’ infringed upon intersex folks and people got incredibly passionate about it, and… and I found I just could not give a single shit. (Well, I cared about intersex folks feeling bullied on. But I was soooo out of shits for caring about using the exact correct acronym for what my goddamn genitals are.)
Seconding that thank you. And I’ll have this all wrapped up in a bow by Monday, running statistics now but am pretty much done.
Thanks David! ^_^
I didn’t run intersex v acceptance, not enough people for it to be meaningful, but let me give it the old eyeball.
Back to the conversation about jargon – I really wish social justice oriented spaces would dial that back a bit or a lot. Particularly if you’re in any way claiming to address issues related to class or poverty, insisting that people must know the correct jargon in order to participate doesn’t exactly create the most welcoming environment. It gives the impression that you intend primarily to talk about people rather than to them.
RE: Ally S
Tumblr is a thing that hangs from a tree, and you can’t tell whether it’s a pinata or a beehive until you hit it with a stick and see what comes out. You can find some really cool shit there and it’s great for finding art and shinies… but not gonna lie, I don’t go there much anymore, because it’s such a toxic cesspool of identity politics and frothing rage and backlash that going there, I feel worse. Like, if you want to visit, find a few safe little corners to hang in them, and NEVER LEAVE. (it is FANTASTIC for finding shit like trans art and good porn though.)
It’s also got this terrible issue where a lot of people only have the privilege hammer, and so everything looks like a privilege nail. So you get whackadoos claiming shit like people with EDs just don’t want to give up their thin privilege, and… oh god just never leave your safe corners or you’ll never stop being angry.
RE: CassandraSays
Yes! YESSSSS! What you just said! That, right there! You just said everything I meant only much more succinctly! THANK YOU!
Ok, we only had three intersex people take the survey, but all three are on the agree side of feeling accepted here. N=3 is basically meaningless, but at least they didn’t check the disagree options?
Cuz yeah, don’t like people, of any sort, feeling bullied (except assholes, but they earn it)
Cassandra, yes, it turns into an academic in-group thing in some places. Some twit on Feministe (which hasn’t been too bad lately, I’ve been commenting in some threads) was being condescending a while back. I couldn’t resist throwing in that I’ve written to an actual published historian to ask him what he was talking about in an article I read, and so far from doing the “you should know the lingo if you’re going to read my books” he explained the term, and was pleasantly surprised, I think, at getting a fan letter. (He was also amazed anyone read his first book, ‘cos he said he didn’t really know what he was doing and it was pretty unreadable!)
Oh! I forgot I promised pictures.
Here’s my boy in his carseat (and yes, his octopus buddy has a trucker’s cap and NINE tentacles, don’t ask me, idfk).
And my girl in hers. She is NOT happy.
These were taken at the rest stop on the northbound lane of I-75 just north of the Kentucky-Tennessee border. They got lots of attention that day, and they loved it, although they look kind of tired in these shots (and we’d only been on the road about an hour).
What the fuck does this have to do with the thing that I actually said?
YOU asked someone why she, being married, had a problem with puas, as though being married was some sort of magical get out of getting hit on by douchebags free card.
I pointed out that many puas don’t give a shit if a woman is in a relationship, they’ll still pursue her anyway, hence married women still end up having to deal with puas and their bullshit.
Your response has nothing to do with the point I made.
LOL those expressions, Falconer! Boy Falconer looks so knowing with that little smile, and Girl Falconer … daddy, you just better watch out, that’s all.
Come to think of it, she looks like she’s translated Cat Anger Consequences into Baby Anger Consequences.
@LBT
Yuck. That sounds awful (especially about the attitudes towards people with EDs – WTF?).
And forgive me if this sounds very silly for me to ask, but do you have a problem with identity politics in general, or do you just hate how it’s done on Tumblr?
@ Falconer
Those pics are hilarious. First pic – I am so happy in my onesie and my car seat! Yay! Second pic…
All hail the Dark Lord! Thank you, David.
The victim shaming was over the line. Stay classy, OF.
I just swore at girl Falconer indirectly, I am sorry.
Out the iPad down next to me with her on it and ran acceptance in general for mental disability and HOLY SHIT. This doesn’t require more than eyeballing it, this difference is HUGE. Like “agree” is expected (using the data for people without any disability) to be 126~, it’s 62. For “disagree” it should be 10, it’s 48.
This isn’t an artifact of slight differences in how accepted we crazies feel, this is a ridiculously huge “no, society does not accept us”. I am (obviously) not surprised, but DAMN.
Tangentially, 5 crazy pills, got a regular anti-depressant added (well, Wellbutrin, which isn’t “regular” per se, but isn’t my mood stablizer is not anti-depressent pill either)…which means my breakfast is now three white pills in small, medium and large. This amuses me greatly.
I have a few safe corners of Tumblr.
The Classic Who fandom can be cute and cuddly, especially when they go on a Two/Jamie cling-binge (srsly they have like no personal space).
Ursula fucking Vernon is on there.
David Willis has a Tumblr, and does yeoman’s work IMO (you may have seen some of his most important work already.
But the social justice peeps, they’re like a pack of hyenas, waiting and watching for one of their number to show weakness so they can pounce and prove how much More Aware Than Thou they are.
So yeah, go to Tumblr, but whatever you do, don’t get out of the boat.
One of the David Cats
Be afraid. Be very afraid.
I will never forget the privilege discussion on Tumblr in which someone said that their mother was oppressing them with her diurnal privilege and nobody said anything. At that point I was pretty much done.
@Argenti: No worries, her first word’ll probably be “fuckface” or something.
Daddy’s gotta tone it down soon.
Falconer, the babbies are adorable. Tiny girl looks like she’s plotting revenge.
Re: Tumblr, I think one’s experience on it is going to depend a lot on who you follow. I like it but I think that’s because I tend to instantly unfollow anybody who’s a douchebag. When I do see horrible shit on there (and there IS a lot of horrible shit on there), it’s because someone I follow reblogged it to comment on how horrible it is.