Heartiste: Men need to be able to hit their mates in order to “retain” them
A better way to retain your mate: Be a sharp-dressed man.
You may know Heartiste as a reactionary, misogynistic, proudly racist dispenser of manipulative, sometimes abusive dating advice to would-be “alpha males.”
Did you also know that he was an open advocate of domestic violence against women?
Well, I didn’t, until a friend pointed out a strange little exchange on his Twitter account the other day.
Last Tuesday morning, apropos of nothing in particular, Heartiste made the following pronouncement:
When someone asked what sort of threats he meant, he elaborated:
The latter three items on the list (“Abandonment. Shame. Ostracism”) are standard techniques in Heartiste’s dating strategy, but the open advocacy of violence is, I think, new.
In addition to being repugnant, Heartiste’s argument here doesn’t even particularly make sense. Essentially, he seems to be saying that men need to be able to hit women to keep them in line so that they won’t have to … hit women to keep them in line.
Also, the phrase “mate retention strategy,” apparently popular with Evo Psych types, gives me the creeps. I’m pretty sure the best “mate retention strategy” is to be the sort of person your “mate” wants to be in a relationship with.
I did a quick search for the phrase, and found numerous references to two academic studies. One suggested that some women fake orgasms as a “mate retention strategy.” Another possibly more revealing one claimed that men of “low mate value” often insult their mates to lower their self-esteem so they won’t feel confident enough to leave. That seems more or less in line with what Heartiste’s general approach. And certainly, by any reasonable definition of the term, Heartiste and his followers are some pretty “low value” people, both as “mates” and as decent human beings generally.
I also found this reference to research by Evo Psych big daddy David Buss suggesting that violence — surprise! — isn’t actually a particularly effective “mate retention strategy.”
Also, beating up your mate is, you know, just generally a pretty shitty thing to do.
If Heartiste takes his tweets down, I’ve got screenshots.
EDITED TO ADD: Heartiste has really been going wild with the Twitter lately.
Here he claims to have invented the term “hivemind.”
After I pointed out that this belief was delusional, he suggested that I kill myself. Very alpha!
He’s also been on a bit of a racist rampage, posting lots of stuff like this:
See also here, here, here, here, and here.
Phrasing your racism in pseudoscientific terms doesn’t make it right, dude. It just makes you a pretentious racist.
Posted on June 24, 2013, in advocacy of violence, alpha males, creepy, domestic violence, douchebaggery, evo psych fairy tales, grandiosity, heartiste, men who should not ever be with women ever, misogyny, PUA, racism and tagged domestic violence, heartiste, misogyny, pick-up artists, pickup artists, PUA. Bookmark the permalink. 801 Comments.
I don’t blame you. I still don’t completely understand the story because holy shit that symbolism X_X
Fantastic anime, though. The music’s great, too. It also has an interesting perspective of orientation and gender identity, IIRC.
Ah, thanks Argenti!
RE: Fibinachi
Think of him as the Jabberwocky, and merely repeat:
‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
Somehow, without ever meaning to, I memorized the first verse of the Jabberwock. I regret nothing!
RE: SittieKitty
The prompts still up for grabs are here!
And thanks for the assurances, everyone. To make myself feel better, I am writing the flufflies, happiest, most consentastic romanceporn EVER.
Gillian, my pleasure! Miss Katie had nuclear-strength Cute as a baby, and she knew it. She still exercises her wiles now at Home. Mr K is wrapped around that little velvet paw. ;)
@AbominableSnowPickle Those are some super cute boys!
Kittehs, she’d have me waiting on her paw and paw too!
Saw someone mention Revolutionary Girl Utena and decided to de-lurk.
I used to be just a *little* too obsessed with that anime back in university.
Anyway, hello everyone!
Hey LBT, I was thinking about your guidelines for writing fictional systems last night and I came up with a story idea. It’s a system where the headspace is an inn and one system member is an “innkeeper” who doesn’t front but who manages the whole system. Other members come and go from the system because they have places they want to go or things they want to accomplish. So it’s sort of an ensemble journey story about the different people who become part of the system and how she helps them.
Sound interesting?
Also, holy balls, you people are awesome. Just today, you’ve pretty much doubled my writeathon attendance.
Orion is erased from my soul! I AM CLEANSED, BROTHERS AND SISTERS AND SIBLINGS!
Aww, these people really are a huge downer. I keep thinking I stop reading this shit, but ya’ll are so awesome! *torn*
Oh god I love I love clown loaches so bad. And cories. I want them aaaaall. <3 <3
RE: katz
I love it! That sounds awesome!
@kittehserf
Actually, I was thinking FMA Homunculi. Might as well mention that while we’re talking about anime.
Thanks for sharing AbominableSnowPickle! Is the second one walking on a skylight or running along a window?? :D
Thanks LBT.
Wait, I thought Heartiste already advocated for domestic violence. Or was that someone else? God, they’re all so vile, I can never tell them apart.
Cthulhu’s Intern, that was the guy behind In Mala Fide (Matt Forney, I think). But yeah, their names aren’t really worth remembering anyway.
RE: SIttieKitty
It’s a bit late where I am, and I’m writing revenge fluffy consentporn to finish the purge of orion from my soul, but tomorrow morning, I shall upload your prompts! Thank you so much for contributing!
It says something with the intern of a nigh omnipotent Thing from beyond the keen man, it who dwells in the cities of the Dreaming Dark and whoose mind, if it can be called such, reaches for the gibbering few among us amongst dark paths at night…
…. Can’t tell apart people because they’re too vile.
No worries LBT. No rush.
Looking at Twitter, it appears that ole’ Heartiste is angry with you. :)
Cool. Followup question: My characters necessarily need to have their own backgrounds. I know Mac has his own history because of the soulbond; are there other ways members can have their own memories? And in what sense are/aren’t those memories connected to the physical world?
RE: katz
It’s possible for members to just come from ‘elsewhere’ without a soulbond being involved. Falcon’s an example–I don’t know WHERE the hell he comes from, or what he does. All I know is that once he came in wrecked, said he needed to stay here “a while” and didn’t manage to get out until months later, at which point he promptly returned an hour later bellowing, “THEY SOLD MY HOUSE!” Didn’t even know the bastard HAD a house.
The memories can be connected to the corporeal world, or from another. They can be channeled spirits, a bit like Kittehs, or they can be tentaclebeasts from the Planet Smoo, or from alternate histories. (“What do you mean, the Beatles split up? OH JOHN LENNON NO”) Or they might just pop up one day. There’s a lot of variety!
Bob – I didn’t think you meant the Peking Homunculus, but that’s the only one I know and the image of Heartiste as a creepy little robot with a pig’s cerebral cortex and a penchant for violence seems very apt.
Mate retention strategy, abuse and manipulation, tomato, tomahto.
So I see Roissy’s entire feed is basically dedicated to finding examples of serial killers who got married and/or had girlfriends. Because those women are a perfectly representative of that elusive Woman phantasm they’re so fond of…
Hrovitnir —
Internet twins! YES.
Makes sense, since David can only think up so many iterations of quirks and skill sets for his legion of ferrets, I mean sock puppets, I mean each ferret does at least one sock puppet but there are only so many ferrets type of thing.
And we all think MEEZERS are the best, second only to Fleshy Cats: http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2421/3842401938_9dd844e118.jpg
Well, to be fair, we are all like ants to the massive lumbering things that lurk beyond the veil, their unfathomable minds barely sparing a thought to the puny insects scurrying beneath their gaze. If a gnat stings you, you do not find its name and treat it like an individual, you squish it like the irritant pest that it is.
Oh, Horrible things. Horrible, wonderous things, spare us your gaze and let us remain in blissful ignorance.
(that comment kind of got away from me)
Man, I tried reaching for the massive lumbering things that lurk beyond the veil to fathom the unfathomable mind once, and all I got was a headache. And I woke up in a desert of bleached bones underneath a lightless sun, dustcaked horizons stretching towards infinity and an endless, ceaseless keening.
6 / 10, would not reach through obscure and eldritch rituals again.
*nods along with myself* I do likes the naked cats, though really their existence is a bit wrong considering the upkeep they need! Certainly not independent beasties. But freaking awesome.
I think I really ought to be rats in a ferret suit in a cat suit in a David suit. A bit weird, what with all wanting to eat themselves, but we can run with it.
Here, are you calling the Great Furred Ones fat?
Ah! Forgot how fast these threads move…I got to reading and lost track of time^.^
Q is Q because his shelter name was “Q-T Pie” and we didn’t like that much, and called him Q and it just stuck^.^
That’s Q on the screen door, another picture that I forgot to flip before uploading *blush* He still does it, though the curtain for the back door is more his speed now. He climbs like crazy! They love their cat tree too^.^
Meezers are the best! But I don’t discriminate…I love ALL kitties. Especially misandric kitties^.^
Uhm…I hadn’t thought of a nickname, though my user name is pretty long, no that I think about it. Uhm…Snow? Or Abominable, maybe? I don’t wanna be called Pickle though, because Ihate them so much^.^
I think Fartiste IS an FMA-style humonculus…Instead of Wrath, Pride, or Lust, etc. He could be…Asshole. Or Douche! (thoguh I don’t know how correct that usage is. I know I use it as shorthand for a jerk, but I can’t remember the site’s preference and I’d like to do it right) Or something, I’m tired and hurting a lot so my brain has kinda taken a hike at this point^.^
Addendum:
If he were and FMA-style Homunculus, I’d pay good money to watch the Elrics kick his ass into next week. Winry would beat on him with her wrench and Roy could roast him and Riza could shoot him…
*huuuge anime nerd, I am. Huuuge.
Douche and its variations get used here a lot.
If you were in a bity mood your nym could shorten to ASP. :P
ZETTAI UNMEI MOKUSHIROKU
AbominableSnowPickle, does ASP work?
(Been watching a lot of adventure time… initialism ftw)
Just wanna profess my love for the Mighty Boosh, even if it’s not always appropriate or in line with my activism, so good. I’m not sure if I’ve ever found a British comedy that isn’t offensive on some deep level though. I was just trying out this hulu exclusive comedy with my cousin yesterday and we were having a moral dilemma about the premise where an 18 year old girl and 16 year old boy sleep together, so technically she committed statutory rape, but she was also so drunk she didn’t even remember what he looked like. They were playing up the stat rape part for laughs but nobody commented on how he raped her. I don’t think I’ll keep watching that one.
RE: SittieKitty
Oh hey, I just realized, you went over my individual funding bar! That means you get a free bonus sketch! Don’t let me forget, when I upload the posts tomorrow; you can tell me what you’d like, okay?
Ah, but Jessay, 16 is the age of consent in the UK (and here), so while they may have been riffing off omigosh a younger man it’s not really about stat rape.
Have you seen The IT Crowd? It’s a bit more gender-role laden, and not as completely bizarre as The Mighty Boosh, but still amusing and I can’t think of anything particularly problematic in it.
Funnily enough I tend not to like most US comedies because it tends to be so repetitive and boring and leads you along by the hand. But then, I don’t watch a lot of mainstream movies because I get annoyed by recycled tropes and music telling you how to feel. :P
Or rather, if it’s British and they were framing it as statutory rape… I’m not sure how/why. Unless it was a case of “if person A is over the age of 18 and is in a position of trust to person B who is under the age of 18, it is illegal for A to engage in sexual activity with B”, which is reeeeally creepy but doesn’t sound like what you described.
@Karalora
“ZETTAI UNMEI MOKUSHIROKU”
MOKUSHI KUSHIMO
SHIMOKU KUMOSHI
MOSHIKU SHIKUMO
Now that song is going to get stuck in my head XD
The IT Crowd is mostly really funny, but there’s a really appalling transphobic episode in season 3 (“The Speech”) that I’d advise skipping. It made me very uncomfortable to watch, and it could even be triggering for some trans* folks as it culminates in a fistfight between a trans woman and her cis male lover. It’s not graphic or anything, but it’s really icky.
I also like Revolutionary Girl Utena series (I have the manga, too), but I thought the movie was ridiculous. Why does Utena turn into a car? Up to that point, it was neat (but confusing), with the roll reversal and such.
Has anyone else here watched Greenwing? It used to be on Hulu.
LBT, that’s… kinda fantastic :D
I’ve been having a shit night (crappy compulsion to create coupled with a complete lack of ability to create coupled with my muse going on vacation coupled with dark BPD Depression thoughts has caused a very unhappy kitty) so that comes as a nice surprise :)
Coming in late, but amused. So Fartiste is making an ass of himself with his emissions from his tooter account? Let him trumpet his hot air. In the end, people will know there is something rotten in the state of Denmark. Besides, this whole thing doesn’t pass the smell test. Did he get in trouble for ass-ault? Is that why he really made a run for the border?
@Bob Dole and @Cassandrasays
Roissy would be Envy if he were any homonculus. An overly aggressive shapeshifter who uses any means necessary to get what he wants. In the end, you find out he is really an insecure monster who wants what others have.
Watcha creating, Sittie? I’m sure it’s better than you think. Usually is.
Trying to draw. Not working out well. Can’t make him old enough (like, seriously cannot figure out how to draw a 30iish yo) and can’t get the face right… plus, backgrounds… backgrounds are the bane of my artistic existence. Also clothing. Also, I’ve never tried drawing in this style before, so it doesn’t really surprise me that I apparently can’t get it.
Usually I write, but I’m so blank right now I can’t think of anything to write that isn’t going to just make my brain turn in a downward-spiraly direction… Writing in this state is not a good idea, nope nope nope.
For reference.
It’s hard to draw middle-aged people (or, generally, to make people look older without making them look really old), especially in a line drawing. Try adding some nasolabial folds (those lines that go from the corner of your nose around the outside of your mouth). You could give him a forehead wrinkle or too as well, especially since he’s looking pensive.
What sort of story is this for? (I’m an inveterate reader of other people’s stories, if you didn’t know.)
uh… so I only have it sorta half cooked… Basically he’s thrown into having to take care of an old obsession’s child because some political thing or another (still fleshing that out) killed her parents (or maybe just captured them, haven’t decided)… pretty much the story of trying to take care of her when he’s a mental wreck, interspersed with flashbacks to why he’s a mental wreck.
On the plus side, he is supposed to look pensive. So bonus points to expression even if I can’t get his face old/right lol
Sounds interesting. Are you on DeviantArt?
Was thinking about making one. There are some really amazing things on there.
You should :) Everyone who draws should have a DeviantArt. And you can’t be all like “but there are people on there who are amazing!” because by that logic we’d all have to delete our accounts.
Lol. I seriously doubt that. Y’all are pretty awesome.
Well, frinstance, I follow Andree Wallin.
Safe to say he’s a wee bit better than me, and also a professional artist who does concept art for movies and shit.
Wow. I really like some of those. I like the ones that look melancholy. Like nature is taking back the world, that humans were there but have been gone for a while and now all that’s left is the buildings that are slowly being reclaimed; no one around to witness it, the inevitable crumbling of monuments to society… Yeah, see this is why I don’t write when I’m like this ;^.^ I’d have pages of some of melancholia everywhere.
And they wonder why we consider them the abuser’s lobby. I think he must have mentioned every “strategy” that we try to fight and considers them all of them legitimate.
And “mate retention” WTF, they’ll do pretty much anything to avoid having to think of us as human beings with the right to 1. Make our own decisions 2. Go or stay as we choose (the same way they do) 3. Live free of violence and fear. You know, exercise our basic human rights.
That’s a cool pic, SittieKitty.
I think the thing that makes him look much younger than 30 for me is the facial proportion. Very large eyes + smal lower half of face = childlike. I know that’s partly the style and partly the angle (and yes, he definitely looks pensive) but is making his jaw a little heavier worth considering, too? I certainly second katz’s suggestion of a naso-labial fold. Maybe a hint of a line under his eyes?
“Mate retention” just made me think of urine retention. Which, with the name Fartiste, sounds … unfortunate.
I like the IT crowd too, lots of it’s hilarious, but there’s the ep where horrible boss Douglas dates a trans woman… I can’t even decide whether it’s offensive or just weird that she’s portrayed as having completely manly hobbies, like football and beer and whatnot. I mean, AFAIK that’s not an established prejudice about trans women? The prejudice would rather be that they’re really some sort of effeminate men, not women with manly hobbies? So at the end of the day I think it’s more weird than offensive.
And SPOILER ALERT there’s a scene where Douglas eventually finds out that she’s trans and goes spare over it, but I think the joke there really is on Douglas. The thing is, for you who haven’t seen the show, Douglas is a completely horrible person. So when she tells him she’s trans and he’s just shrugs and acts like it’s no big deal at all, you’re surprised at the fact that he’s not horrible for once. And then it turns out that he is a complete transphobe – it’s just that he never actually listens to what women tell him, and so wasn’t listening when she first told him she was trans.
So yeah, there are lots of “he found out his girl was trans and OMG GROSS” in pop culture, which is super offensive, but I think this IT crowd ep is more okay because the joke is really “Douglas isn’t completely horrible, he’s not a transphobe for instance – oh wait a minute we fooled you, he totally is a transphobe only his sexism momentarily eclipsed his transphobia!”. But YMMV on this one, so be warned, everyone looking for non-offensive British comedy.
Thanks Kitteh :) Yea, his face is supposed to be a lot longer. I only picked up this art style yesterday, so I’m still working on getting used to proportions. It’s tougher than I thought – I can do the girls no problem but guys, with the smaller eyes, much more challenging.
Let’s break down the PUA position on relationships.
1. A man is entitled to do anything, up to and including break assault laws, in order to “get” sex.
2. If he doesn’t want a relationship with the woman he just had sex with, she better slink off in embarrassment, that stupid slut, and she better realize that she’s put her chances of a future relationship at risk.
3. If the man does want a relationship, he’s allowed to do whatever it takes to get one. Using emotional abuse to break down the woman’s self-esteem is always a good option here if she’s not immediately swayed by your furry alpha hat.
4. Once in a relationship, it isn’t over till the man says it is, and he has ever right to do whatever it takes to keep that bitch in line.
5. When he decides it’s over then lol, isn’t it hilarious how much older his ex is now and how little sexual market value she has? Serves her right for being a slut.
Yesterday! I haz an impressed. I’ve never picked up a style, and it’d take forever if I tried, I suspect (haven’t drawn for years’n’years, I was seduced by the
dark sidejoys of photoshopping).“if she’s not immediately swayed by your furry alpha hat.”
I read that as furry alpha butt.
Ewwww.
Yeah, that IT Crowd episode goes back and forth and back and forth.
@Kitthehserf
Who is the kitteh in your new gravatar? S/he’s so pwiddy!
I can’t photoshop haha. I can put pencil to paper but not use computers… Generally I draw a lot more “life-like” – so I was challenging myself with the cartoonish aspect and manga is a lot harder in my opinion than american cartoon style. Trying to do dark/more detailed work too, but I suspect I have to get better at the basics before I can try that… Although apparently I can whip up Chibi art of my mental self in about 20 mins. I seem to have picked that up pretty well…
Since people are now talking chibis and were talking FMA earlier, have you seen the chibis from the video that came with the theme son? They’re adorable.
Oh god yeah, how did I forget about that. I was also torn because like you say, it wasn’t actively hateful or disgusted and it was portrayed as a good thing he was open-minded… but it was still “tee hee, she’s an attractive woman but she likes MAN stuff”, culminating in the fight scene, plus how she keeps doing the melodramatic “I’m a WOMAN!” thing… made me super uncomfortable. *sigh*
Stupid memory of fail.