How to Hate and Envy Every Single Person in the World, PUAhate edition
Some guys get all the chicks
The regulars at PUAhate.com – we’ve met them before – are a strange and bitter bunch. Most seem to be self-loathing so-called “incels” who blame their lack of romantic and sexual success on their average or below-average looks. Rejecting the basic premise of the pickup artist crowd – that average guys can transform themselves into suave lotharios by mastering manipulative pickup formulas – the PUAhate regulars tend to be true believers in what they somewhat pretentiously call “looks theory,” the odd and obviously untrue notion that women only date men with “male model” looks.
As one PUAhater put it recently:
PUA makes you think that all your problems are because of your personality/behaviour – i.e. things you can control. So when you keep failing, it means that YOU are fucking up and doing things wrong
the reality is that many of us just lost the genetic lottery. we are ugly, the wrong race, the wrong height etc, and that fucked us up. there is NOTHING we can do about it
So, naturally, the PUAhaters spend a lot of their time jealous of tall, good-looking men for their supposed monopoly on the women of the world — whom they also hate.
But the strange thing is that the PUAhaters pretty much hate everyone else as well. They get angry when guys they consider ugly score “hot chicks.” They get angry when guys who are good-looking but not male models get attention from “really hot girls.” And so on, and so on, and so on.
Indeed, many of the regulars seem to walk around in a perpetual state of rage, angry at each and every man who’s managed to pair up with a woman, not to mention the women as well.
One regular recently described his “day from hell” to his comrades:
To start the day I saw a couple where it was an average White guy with an OBESE Asian girl. They were walking around acting like they were trying to prove shit. LMAO. I wanted to kick the guy in the fucking nuts for dating that landwhale. If you’re going to use the racial advantage, at least date a girl who is under 300lbs. Later I go to the gym and see the same tall guys I usually do. Even if I had a good face, how the fuck do you compete with guys who are fucking 6’4”?
Then at the gym there’s this good looking White guy there talking to this Asian dude about how Asian girls are easy and how they approach him. To make things worse after that these fucking frat douchebags come in with their girlfriends to show off . Then to cap off the day a girl I used to know from freshman year walks right past me without even saying anything. I used to fucking live next door to this bitch and now she doesn’t even say anything and acts like a pretentious cunt. She’s an Indian girl dating a White dude lmao. Days like today make you wonder why you even still try in the first place.
Of course, as I’ve mentioned before, most of those posting on PUAhate don’t actually seem to be ugly by anyone’s standards but their own, at least judging from the pictures of themselves they sometimes post to the site, which reveal them to be mostly average-looking guys, with some of the regulars even quite conventionally handsome.
But evidently they would rather believe that they have “lost the genetic lottery” rather than face a more obvious explanation for why the girls don’t like them: because they’re shallow, self-obsessed assholes who hate themselves and hate women and radiate their bitterness from every pore. (And some are even creepier than this, like this pedophile – sorry, ephebophile – who’s angry at me personally because unlike him I don’t chase after 15-year-olds. Link NSFW.)
The PUAhaters often talk about getting surgeries to “correct” their supposed genetic flaws. They would do far better to spend that money on therapy.
Posted on March 19, 2013, in creepy, disgusting women, drama kings, entitled babies, evil fat fatties, incel, irony alert, misogyny, pedophiles oh sorry ephebophiles, PUA, racism and tagged misogyny, pickup artists, PUA. Bookmark the permalink. 1,520 Comments.
Virgil has been banned already.
that is like more manosphere buzzwords strung together in a sentence than i’ve ever seen before. i’m so stunned, i’m all out of capitals. [slow clap]
pecunium, i’m gonna take up a collection to make that into a t-shirt for you, and i hope you’ll wear it with pride.
@ its all about personality….
How many 18-21 year old girls want a balding boyfriend? Well to judge by the president of the student association at my college, I would say about 20% of the female population of the school. Also a fair number of young men. And probably non-binary people as well although I am not personally aware of them.
He mostly managed this by being an interesting, friendly, outgoing person, and NOT BEING AN ASSHOLE.
Coincidentally, he is also still friends with most of his ex-girlfriends, and is the only one of my ex-boyfriends I still visit on occasion.
“My best friend was balding at 13 and had shaved his head entirely by 18. Of all my friends, he did the most dating.”
Obviously its not everything but letting my hair fall out is hardly going to help my chances. It also depends a lot on the individual, some men can pull off having no hair better than others.
I don’t see why men trying to prevent their hairloss is so different from a woman covering a flaw with make up. There is plenty of advice for women who wish to learn about that, why shouldn’t men have advice on their looks too? Most average guys sorely need it.
Now that’s what I call pretentious! Jeez.
clairedammit- here you go:
No, ItsAllAboutPersonalityJKlolololol, you may not. Piss off.
Jesus, I wish these whiny children would go away.
Dude, go bald or don’t, but let’s not pretend that’s what hosing your chances.
Are you fully aware of all the products designed to help men deal with hair loss? It sounds like you’re not.
My sister was one. She still likes ‘em bald. So was my best friend from high school. She married a bald guy.
But you know, your ugly attitude is the reason. No one wants to be with a guy who is a nasty jerk.
I personally am not a fan of bald guys but I have dated them in the past. My current MASSIVE HUGE crush is on this guy. And he is not super hawt lookswise or anything by anyone’s standards but he is hilarious, really nice, and very responsive to people who like him.
Having someone I can talk to means that I will be able to talk with him in years to come-a person who is just looks but no personality means that there will be nothing to talk about.
I give you THE LAPDOG OF THE MATRIARCHY.
(Not my best work.)
“Jesus, I wish these whiny children would go away.
Dude, go bald or don’t, but let’s not pretend that’s what hosing your chances.”
You literally know nothing about me at this point, or my chances, or what might or might not be damaging them. I don’t understand why I’m being met with such hostility.
You might want to change your username for that argument.
PUGS ARE SQUEE
Itsaboutyouyouyou: We’ve had an influx of whiny young men of late. The chances that you are here for anything but raging at us while asking for dating tips is roughly slim to none. When you don’t get the response you want, hilarity will ensue.
“You might want to change your username for that argument.”
So implying that something other than personality has a factor in attraction is the issue?
Why are you being met with hostility?
Because you’re being willfully ignorant and using that ignorance to support your argument.
chocolatemintlipwax – I can beat that! Counting from, oh, seventeen, I get 33 years.
I’m taking bets: What time will it be in Chicago when this thread reaches 1000?
The day I met my beau the first thing I noticed about him wasn’t his short stature (he was sitting down) or his receding hairline, it was the fact that he had the cheekiest smile I had ever seen. The second thing was his t-shirt printed with some artwork from one of my favourite record labels… and as I got to know him better the attraction only increased because I discovered he was beautiful inside and out. Physically he may not be a “10” by most people’s standards but to me he’s an 11, and his attitude is very far from ugly.
Does anyone else find all this talk of numbers-out-of-ten really creepy? Even calling my mister an “11” for argument’s sake feels a bit wrong.
cloudiah: 9:02
Yeah. I can’t bring myself to use the star system in OK Cupid.
The numbers thing is creepy and stupid.
“Because you’re being willfully ignorant and using that ignorance to support your argument.”
Well you might have to be a little clearer than that, what exactly about what I said was ignorant in your opinion?
…so…then use…that stuff to prevent hair loss. Is anyone telling you not to?
Also, guys can cover up flaws w/ make up and girls can try to prevent balding (yes less girls bald, but still, the comparison is weird. It’s not like balding is only for one gender, same w/ make up :/
Itsallaboutyouyouyou: Just here to JAQ off, I see.
Okay, now I’m really worried about why Mads has got a thing for drinking from the kitchen tap …
My bad, I told him not to.
Cuz I am an evil matriarchal pug.
I better get off here for the night. I owe Kittehs’ too many brewed drinks already.
Whoever guesses the correct time of the 1000th comment will win THIS FABULOUS PRIZE:
“…so…then use…that stuff to prevent hair loss. Is anyone telling you not to?
Also, guys can cover up flaws w/ make up and girls can try to prevent balding (yes less girls bald, but still, the comparison is weird. It’s not like balding is only for one gender, same w/ make up :/”
I will continue to follow the advice I read on preventing baldness. I was just surprised and slightly confused that someone felt that was a particular issue worth highlighting about PUAhate. Unfortunately because of attitudes within society I won’t also be wearing make up, I think it would have a detrimental effect on my dating life.
Oooh wasn’t that in one of Jon Pertwee’s stories?
That previous device has been described as follows: “…there is something weirdly compelling about a device that appears to get a boner while it cooks for you.”
Don’t blame makeup for your shortcomings.
@princess bonbon
Ah, I guess I missed that.
@itsallabout…
Well, you said covering up flaws, and it’s not that noticeable for that *shrugs*
The product almost seems interesting, but that’s an awful commercial. Really. Just for the “Oh dear, eggs stick to the pan.” I’d refuse to buy the product.
Does anyone else find all this talk of numbers-out-of-ten really creepy?
Yes. It also appears to be a ploy (IMHO) to get us to start comparing. I put it in the same catagory as “send me a picture”.
10:22
But I despise eggs, can I have one of these instead? I’m from Texas, I have no clue how to cook these things.
That’s a shame- if only there was some kind of movement fighting against the stereotyping of men and women and against putting them into fixed gender roles and dictating what kinds of behaviour and dress were appropriate for them both…
Someone describes the Third Doctor as a tall man “with a mighty nose.”
(Yeah, I said I was going, but it’s like Batman: When someone mentions Doctor Who on the Internet, I am there.)
You can either have the egg thing, or this other very necessary kitchen tool.
Important: READ THE REVIEWS.
“Oops, my husband just caught me watching porn (that video)”
That’s porn? Sorry, didn’t even occur to me that that kiss might be more than “there’s a kiss here” level NSFW. Sorry!
Rollie eggs look nasty to me…
I’m not into the whole numbers thing either. It’s more like an on-off switch. Mr K – on; everyone else, however beautiful, gorgeous, witty, charming and hot – off. Pretty simple, really.
Hey, I just realised a HUGE INJUSTICE!!!!1!!elebenty! If bonerwhiners can talk about “incel” like it’s a thing and clog up Wiki with their nonsense, why can’t I find any references to single target sexuality outside TV Tropes? It’s not FAAAAAIRRR! ::kicks heels against wall::
“Don’t blame makeup for your shortcomings.”
I didn’t. I actually blamed society for saying men shouldn’t wear make up.
“That’s a shame- if only there was some kind of movement fighting against the stereotyping of men and women and against putting them into fixed gender roles and dictating what kinds of behaviour and dress were appropriate for them both…”
Might be interested in this if it was a movement which didn’t solely blame me for it in the first place. :)
@kittehs
It isn’t fair :P I contribute nothing atm cuz my brain is died…I should go to sleep. :/
re:banana slicer
does anyone cut bananas? I always eat mine in the peel.
Well if I made the prize something good, a person might actually want it if they win, and I am way too lazy to send a person a prize. :D
@itallabout…
…blame you…for what? Cuz I don’t recall anyone blaming you. If we’re talking about feminism vs patriarchy, men benefit more from the patriarchy, doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt them too, just less. :/
rambling. Sleepy now.
I slice bananas for a sammich, or to go in a bowl, but not to eat on their own.
Marie — I thought the same, but I guess if you eat your cereal with milk a sliced banana might be nice?
Who wants to explain the ItsAll… that “the patriarchy” does not mean “each and every man”? Cuz Criminal Minds is starting and I have a date with my favorite male model…I mean geek-tastic former model Dr. Reid.
@kittehs
That makes sense. I guess I just don’t eat them much w/ anything else.
“…blame you…for what? Cuz I don’t recall anyone blaming you. If we’re talking about feminism vs patriarchy, men benefit more from the patriarchy, doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt them too, just less. :/”
I don’t think I do benefit much from it at all. Neither do the other men who aren’t what they are told they should be. You think the incels whining on PUAhate are really living it up?
I’m sure a minority of men benefit from the way society is structured, many don’t. Men are over represented in prisons as well as in the suicide rates, I don’t think they are benefiting from the system as it is.
@argenti aertheri
I’ve tried to explain. I’m sleepy though (which I’ve mentioned like, 5 times by now) so I may be harder to understand. oh wwellss.
Now I feel strange. I feel like a banana hater….gah, so rambly today :/
Yeah, I don’t think I’d use it to make eggs either, but it could be interesting for very small meatloaves. I’ve never figured out how to prepare gyros meat with a spit.
Oh and as for the blame part you might not have but certain members of your movement definitely would. Just look at the instant response I got here.
@Marie
BANANAS FOSTER!!! Best thing ever and it seems like it wouldn’t be right to just dump whole bananas in there. ;)
Unknown poster with sarcastic username shows up in a thread that is populated with whining trolls; commences whining; later reveals self to be anti-feminist. Is shocked, shocked I tell you, when users here don’t fawn all over hir.
Why isn’t feminism nicer to me when I am so mean to women? WAHHHHH!!
@itsallabout
Not all that much, far as I can tell. But you don’t have to be viewed as a sex object, so I’m still saying it’s better for men. You’re right though. Not all men. But what it does:
-rape culture: when we tell women* that they are responsible to protect themselves from their own rape, instead focusing on the rapists, we blame the victim instead of the rapist. Rape is treated as a less serious crime, and rapists aren’t given a serious sentence. Not to mention constantly questioning what the victim did to ‘deserve’ it. Not all men are rapists, but it is part of patriarchy, and a way that affects men less.
*rape culture has negative affects on men who are rape victims too, but in different ways. Not super knowledgeable on it, so someone else can explain if they want.
-Ways you don’t notice if you benefit from it: when a man is promoted/hired over a woman while assuming to be more qualified. This also has more to do w/ than just patriarchy, like when employers hire white people over people of color.
I don’t think they are ‘living it up.’ I just think they don’t have to deal w/ as much crap as women do. Not the same thing.
On men over represented in prisons, in the US (where I live) a lot of them are in there because they’re black men, not just men. So that’s not so much as patriarchy but racism. :/
I don’t think the patriarchy benefits men all that much. I just think it’s a heck a lot nicer on straight, cis, men than women.
/gah I don’t even know if I’m coherent at this hour.
You know what I don’t think helps, all these celebrity interviews where guys or women go “oh yeah I didn’t have sex until late, you know 16″. Knowing people, it isn’t all that common to have had sex by 16, I don’t mean it is abnormal, just it isn’t late. Most people I know didn’t have sex until at least 21. I kind of wish our culture would be more honest and admit a lot of people aren’t having super sexy times at 18. I don’t think it is good that perfectly average guys think they are some kind of freak of nature. I mean their attitude kind of stinks but I do wonder if realising they were normal (for both men and women) might help. I was rejected (rightfully so) so much when I was young, I’m still learning this complex world and hopefully getting better.
@itsallabout
Maybe certain members would, but it’s a big movement. The instant response though was probably due to your user name and the content of your comments, this isn’t a feminist 101 site, though I’m trying to explain cuz I’m bored and don’t see a reason not to. It’s a blog to mock misogyny, so if you’re being misogynistic, even unintentionally, you’re probably going to be mocked.
@some gal
…what’s a banana foster? I haven’t heard of one before :P
It’s a dessert. Basically, you take a banana, drown it in rum, and set it on fire.
@baroncognito
hmm. That sounds interesting. I should try it some time.
You are more than welcome! I am flattered. :)
I find having to explain to men that feminism isn’t anti-men so tiring. And that your benefit as a man in patriarchy may be more along the line of “all else being equal, being a woman in your situation would probably be worse”, which doesn’t make anyone feel better about the shit they do have to deal with.
But that’s the thing. These people never come in here with sympathy for woman, never want to engage with the topic at hand. They’re usually aggressive, failing that passive-aggressive, and rather than just not being actively feminist they’re actively anti-feminist and that means supporting a culture that silences women. I’m so fucking over it, even though I can empathise.
I think for young dudes, they hear a lot about women’s issues, so they feel like the topic is dominated by women. But it’s not! It is dominated by LIP SERVICE toward equality, a conception of equality that completely misunderstands the entire point, and a reality that constantly, consistently, treats men as default and women as an afterthought.
And there ARE feminists and feminist spaces that are hostile to men. I don’t like it either! But that doesn’t mean feminists don’t care about men, and it sure as fuck doesn’t justify misogyny because people aren’t nice enough to you. You should foster empathy because it’s a good trait, not because you get immediate reward.
Yes. good phrasing.
You don’t know much about anything, do you? Go do some reading on feminism.
As to your reception here and your semi-sore ass over it, allow me to quote Livia Soprano: “Poor you.”
For some drink competition, my Dad made a drink based off of bananas foster. He called it the flaming ass monkey. It consisted of banana liqueur, creme de caramel, and 150 proof rum. It was garnished with a maraschino cherry cut so as to look like a sphincter and then the whole drink was set on fire.
“Not all that much, far as I can tell. But you don’t have to be viewed as a sex object, so I’m still saying it’s better for men.”
So when I was once told that ‘I would definitely get it’ by a gay man that wasn’t being objectified at all? Or when a group of teenage girls giggled as I walked past after one of them said ‘mmm yummy’ while staring at me, that wasn’t objectifying me? Now I wasn’t actually offended by either of these instances, I just felt a little uncomfortable, but its not something that no men ever experience. As you said with rape as well, men can also be victims.
“Ways you don’t notice if you benefit from it: when a man is promoted/hired over a woman while assuming to be more qualified.”
Again its not unreasonable to think this also happens the other way around. Its very hard to prove how much this happens either way.
“On men over represented in prisons, in the US (where I live) a lot of them are in there because they’re black men, not just men. So that’s not so much as patriarchy but racism. :/”
Yes black people are over represented in prisons too. But men are still over represented compared to women, black or not.
“I don’t think the patriarchy benefits men all that much. I just think it’s a heck a lot nicer on straight, cis, men than women.”
This is where I really disagree, I think the system fucks over everyone who doesn’t conform to exactly what is preferred by society.
@cloudiah
Thank you so much for introducing me to the one and only Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer. I’ll name my firstborn after you,
But Cami, are you familiar with Tuscan Whole MIlk? http://www.amazon.com/Tuscan-Whole-Milk-Gallon-128/product-reviews/B00032G1S0/ref=cm_cr_dp_see_all_summary?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1
HI Kitteh,
Yes, I can recall the scene, but not the episode.
Yes, that is the quote. My old grey cells had changed it… bummer.
Thanks Falconer.