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The search for a slut-free college

Don't let the books fool you -- these gals are up to no good!

Don’t let the books fool you — these gals are up to no good!

So the high school freshman who calls himself Bostonian42 is thinking ahead to college. And he’s got questions. Well, actually just one question, which he’s asking people about every college he’s interested in: is this college full of sluts? Because if it is, he wants none of it.

Here he is, inquiring about Dartmouth:

Dartmouth

He’s posted similar comments for eight other colleges.

Sounds like he may want to avoid whatever college it is that Amanda here is going to. (See here for more from this inadvertantly hilarious comic book.)

110

(Thanks to @MaraWritesStuff on Twitter for alerting the world to Boston42’s noble quest.)

(Oh, and I guess I’m back to posting again, though my posts may be a little light for awhile.)

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Posted on March 10, 2013, in creepy, evil sexy ladies, misogyny, sluts and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 321 Comments.

  1. *starts stockpiling the brains of men (misandry!) in order to placate the zombies*

    It’s true, zombie straw feminism is out to suck the sweet, sweet meninges of men who are made to sit on hard chairs.

  2. Pecunium — that’s not careful dictation, that’s “I only know how to write a 5 paragraph essay” — you’ve been out of school long enough to have avoided that, probably. Lucky you. I got low mark after low mark for not writing papers as intro; point one — intro sentence, 3 sentences supporting it, conclusion sentence; repeat for points 2 and 3; conclusion paragraph.

    Needless to say, colleges immediately teach you how not to write like that. And sorry for the writing lesson, I was one of the first classes to graduate under No Child Left Behind and it was hellish.

    In short, that sort of having to please a formula that sucks, trains you to write tiny sentences so you can meet the 3 sentences per point bull without having much substance. Cicero would’ve shat on it (I didn’t learn how to actually write until Latin, hence the Cicero reference)

    Everyone — I lack spoons for trolls, enjoy your chew toys!

  3. @Argenti

    Don’t make the five-paragraph essay sound better than it is! The way I was originally taught (8th grade), It was:

    Topic Sentence, Point One, Point Two, Point Three, Conclusion Sentence

    Point One Sentence from Paragraph One, Subpoints One, Two, Three, Conclusion Sentence

    Point Two Sentence from Paragraph One, Subpoints One, Two, Three, Conclusion Sentence

    Point Three Sentence from Paragraph One, Subpoints One, Two, Three, Conclusion Sentence

    Conclusion Sentence from Paragraph One, Conclusion Sentences from Paragraphs Two, Three, Four, New Conclusion Sentence

    I wrote an essay following exactly this for my State Competency Exam in HS (11th?) and got a 5/6. It is a miracle I can write at all.

  4. I should note that my HS had taught me to write for the AP Exams so I was a better writer than five-paragraph essay me, but I just didn’t care/knew I wouldn’t fail.

  5. @some gal and argenti aertheri.

    I hate those essays. I don’t really think writing can be taught with a formula. Most of the time they just sound stilted.

    related, I mentioned this:

    Needless to say, colleges immediately teach you how not to write like that.

    to my sister, sine I thought she’s enjoy it, as she just lost points on an essay for not doing it in that format XD

  6. Some Gal — lol, yeah, it really is terrible!

    Marie — I mean, depending how much longer she has in school, she may just have to deal with it for the sake of her grades. But yes, colleges will want all the writing skills you have to suppress to manage that formula. So she shouldn’t feel bad about hating it!

  7. @Marie

    Stilted and mind-numbingly repetitive. Good writing shouldn’t repeat sentences (even if they are slightly re-written, as seen in stage 2 of the “learning to write badly to graduate” lesson plan).

  8. @argenti aertheri

    So far it’s only been one essay, and she was upset because it lowered her grade to a B+ :P Probably is bad, but my grades always sucked, so I’m like but a B+ is good.

    It’s an online school, both of us ended up dropping out earlier due to depression, but I just want to take the GED and she’s trying to finish school and go to college. She either has one or two years left, depending on how many classes she gets in.

  9. Oh, ps, good news, I got a job! :D (seemed slightly related… maybe not…I’m just all excited since I’ve been feeling useless since my anti depressants started working and I can finally probably do something. )

  10. Congrats on the job, Marie!

  11. @Cloudiah

    Thanks! :D

  12. @creative writing student

    Thanks :D and that’s a cute puppy. Sadly, I am not like that puppy, because my worry and my excitement kind of interfere with each other. Just nervous because it’s my first job that’s…how to phrase this…long? It’s babysitting, but I’ve been only for a couple hours until now, and I’m babysitting for the mom while she’s at work until june so… quite a while for me.

    Sorry for turning this thread all about me … *blushes*

  13. @Marie

    You can always do college with a GED (now, in the future, or never :) ). It might not have as many options, but it is possible. The boyfriend did it (he dropped out of middle school due to emotional stuff and only went back to “formal” education for college).

    Congrats on the job!

  14. @ some gal

    thanks for advice :) Though I don’t think I’ll do a huge college diploma. I do want to do some college classes though, but most of the jobs I’ve been looking into don’t require college education. Works for me, because somehow I don’t think I could handle a 4+ more years. Heck, I didn’t make it through 2 in highschool.

  15. I suppose there’s the whole “writing for your audience” thing… if your audience hates decent essays, write a 5-paragraph one. :p

  16. @Marle: In all fairness, college is way more fun than high school.

  17. @bagelsan

    I suppose there’s the whole “writing for your audience” thing… if your audience hates decent essays, write a 5-paragraph one. :p

    *giggles* I mean, I think it’s a fine thing to teach when kids are just starting to write essays, like in junior high, but after that they should have some nice time to tweak it or dump it or whatever. To find their own writing style. It would be pretty overwhelming your first essay or so to have to wing the whole thing.

    @Marle: In all fairness, college is way more fun than high school.

    Hopefully…I’m just very suspicious.

  18. Some gal, I learned that exact same essay format, too. Ye gods, it’s amazing any of us can express a coherent thought.

  19. A 5 paragraph essay about MRAs:

    MRAs are Men’s Rights Advocates. They congregate online. MRAs are terrible people.

    MRAs are terrible smelling. This is evidenced by their basic lack of social skills and hygiene. No one likes to be near them. This causes them to be incredibly bitter and lonely.

    MRAs are terrible writers. This is evidenced by their incoherent walls of text. No one wants to talk to them. This causes them to be incredibly bitter and lonely.

    MRAs are terrible in bed. This is evidenced by their basic misunderstanding of the human body and of human emotion. No one wants to sleep with them. This causes them to be incredibly bitter and lonely.

    In conclusion, MRAs are shitty examples of barely-human douchefaces. All throughout the world MRAs are terrible, and they will be forever more. The end.

  20. @Bagelsan

    They need to wow women with their Zest. (Apologies to anyone who just got this out if their heads.)

  21. I would totally include MRAs’ pathetic lack of zest, but this ain’t a 6 paragraph essay!

  22. I can’t believe they actually made students follow a step-by-step plan to essay writing. Was the plan to produce people who would be frozen in panic the moment they encountered a situation that didn’t fit the template they’d been taught?

  23. Also, I’m trying to think of an MRA equivalent to Bindel (cranky old fart who most people roll their eyes at, employed mainly as a way for a newspaper to troll their own readers), but I can’t, because they tend to fall all over themselves to kiss the asses of their own cranky old farts, and although newspapers do love to troll readers for page hits, they tend to frown on un-punctuated, incoherent walls of text.

  24. @CassandraSays

    I can’t believe they actually made students follow a step-by-step plan to essay writing. Was the plan to produce people who would be frozen in panic the moment they encountered a situation that didn’t fit the template they’d been taught?

    From what I’ve heard about Freshman Comp classes, that is not inaccurate.

    It is probably more likely that many teachers themselves don’t know how to write. (My sister teachers HS math and some of the other teachers would barely pass their own classes.)

  25. I should also say that even when teachers know what they are doing, they aren’t really trusted to teach it. So, that could also be where the 5 paragraph essay comes from.

    (Florida is implementing testing for its math classes that will determine whether or not students pass rather than relying on their grade in the class. The current standards will result in a 50% or so fail rate. It is designed that way. Because the state legislature is obviously far more knowledge than the teachers.)

  26. I can’t believe they actually made students follow a step-by-step plan to essay writing. Was the plan to produce people who would be frozen in panic the moment they encountered a situation that didn’t fit the template they’d been taught?

    Ugh, you have no idea. So much “What’s my third point? Gotta think of a third point!”

  27. smh over the idea that anyone could be taught to “write” like those essays … strewth.

    Marie, congrats on the job!

  28. @kittehs

    Thanks :D

  29. The Purple Star

    Do you sleep with men too? Is that why you hold men to the same standards? If not, this statement is in direct contradiction to your previous statement. Either you are merely concerned about people’s sexual history because you are concerned about your health (which is still rather suspect, since rather than shaming a partner into telling you all their past partners so you can call them a slutty slut, an STD test would be way more effective in gauging any potential health risks in part because not all STDs are contracted via sex, not all “sluts” contract diseases, and not everyone is going to be super forthcoming with an accusatory partner, particularly a partner who says “If you make your sexual endeavors known to others, then people are going to judge you for it.”) OR you just like to judge people.

    I’m sorry but this does not logically follow. I do not sleep with men(nor do I find them sexually attractive-deal with it) but I hold men to the same standard as women for consistency’s sake. I would be concerned and upset if I found out, say, that my current gf was sleeping around with other people for the following two reasons:

    1. I don’t want to contract STDs.

    2. I myself am monogamous and do not care to sleep with people who aren’t.

    So if you don’t want people to judge you about your sex life, then keep it to yourself. As for this young man, I should point out that at no point did he use the word “slut”. And it’s quite true that most collegians are slutty; regardless of gender or sexuality. So he wishes to attend a school where people share his values. Nothin wrong with that! Since people have judge me harshly on things that are beyond my control, I reserve the right to judge them on things that are totally under their control.

  30. @purple star

    dude, nobody is trying to say you should sleep with/ date people who sleep with a lot of people. We just don’t think you should judge people for how much sex they have. For gods sake, their sex life is none of your business unless you’re sleeping with/ dating them. How long does it take you to get that through your head?

  31. I myself am monogamous and do not care to sleep with people who aren’t.

    People? So, you’re serially monogamous? Because if you’re only sleeping with one person ever, that sentence doesn’t make sense, and what other people do isn’t relevant to you, because you won’t BE sleeping with them.

    And call me picky, but “serially monogamous” doesn’t sound a hell of a lot different from having a succession of partners (whatever numbers we’re talking about) to me.

  32. I like the part where Purpley said “I do not sleep with men(nor do I find them sexually attractive-deal with it)” because damn, do straight dudes ever get a lot of shit for being straight, amirite?

  33. “But everything is a misogyny to a feminist.”

    Hahaha, what a clueless chucklefuck. I love these self-important bloviating philosophizers who can’t even be bothered to understand the basics.

  34. Poor Robert Lindsey, attacked at every turn. “You can’t win with these bitches,” says Lindsay. No, Lindsey, you can’t. Not if you are playing a game of ‘let’s concern troll universities and engage in some slut shaming’. Feminists invented shutting down slut-shamers- they really did!! You cannot win with these bitches, Lindsey- it’s time to take your ball and go home.

  35. “I am neither a racist nor a misogynist, but I have my own definitions about those terms….” It’s funny what you can claim not to be when you invent your own meanings for words. It’s funnier what you can claim to be. I, for instance, am Tom Cruise in Top Gun. This is absolutely true the way I use those phrases.

  36. “And call me picky, but “serially monogamous” doesn’t sound a hell of a lot different from having a succession of partners (whatever numbers we’re talking about) to me.”

    Must. Be. Monogamous. With. Current. Partner! Yeah, done serial monogamy, difference between that and poly is the simple “anything with anyone else, ever, is cheating” versus ground rules on what’s acceptable // how various partners interact.

    …which probably isn’t what you meant, be I’m tired, sorry!

  37. I wasn’t thinking of poly/cheating/monogamy, no, but it’s a good point. It was more that purplepox is just as pearl-clutching about people having had previous partners – women having slept with several men = promiscuous, without any suggestion as to whether this means in a poly way or consecutively. Yet his latest post sounds like serial monogamy … and how is that different from consecutive partners?

  38. Argenti: I meant diction. Not so much topic structure (though that too seems a bit too well controlled; for a 14 year old, to me, but I will grant the possibility of his being an outlier. I certainly was), but his word choice and order.

    The actual concepts are more developed than I expect in a 14-15 year old. Having recently gone back to college, and peer reviewed a number of 18-21 year olds’ papers, it’s better than many of theirs.

  39. Wow… “Bay Area Guy” used GGG as support for how bad Dave is.

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