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Feminists! Give up your misandry, accept that women are inferior, and oh, this MRA rant gets worse. Much worse.

Whatever this kid is saying is guaranteed to be smarter and less offensive than Jacob Ian Stalk's horrific rant

Whatever this kid is saying is guaranteed to be smarter and less offensive than Jacob Ian Stalk’s horrific rant

Cloudiah found this amazingly awful rant — from a prolific manosphere commenter and Spearhead supporter by the name of Jacob Ian Stalk — in the comments section to a piece on feminism in The Tab Oxford, a student paper. She posted it in the comments here on Man Boobz, where it’s already generated a good deal of discussion (see comments here, here, here, and here for starters). But I thought it deserved a post of its own.

So without further ado, I present Jacob Ian Stalk’s “12-Step Program for Recovering Feminists.”

Equality is equality. Feminism is about the unbridled pursuit of power for women. Got that?

Uh, no, actually, because it’s not true, but please continue.

The age of feminism is over, thankfully. The comments here that support feminism are from the rats that refuse to leave the sinking ship, thinking there’s sustenance still to be found there somewhere. Sorry to disappoint, but there is nothing nutritious left.

So the ship is sinking at the very moment it’s run out of food that rats can eat. That’s quite a coincidence! Or is it sinking because it ran out of food? Were the dudes on the ship using rat food to plug holes in the hull?

Men the world over are waking up to the damage wrought by rampant feminism and they’re shocked to realise it all happened while they were asleep. Well, they’re asleep no more. Bleat all you like about feminism being about this or that, but the truth of it’s evil is written all over the once noble institutions of the world and the wishful bleatings of solipsistic girl-children can’t erase it. It is done. The cailphate is establishing its power base once more and Sharia law is spreading.

Huh? Because of feminism? Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Feminists have destroyed the family and have eschewed child-bearing in favour of credentialism and the illusion of success, killing their unborn children and robbing men of their will to be fathers and husbands. The laugh is on you, Western feminists, as Western birth rates have at last fallen below their replenishment rate and the Muslims are laughing all the way to the maternity wards.

Oh, dear, you got some racism in your misogyny. Two terrible tastes that taste worse together!

The best you can hope for, Western women, is to abandon feminism entirely. Abandon that idiotic notion of ‘equality’, as it will never happen.  All it has earned you is the disrespect of men and an increasing number of women the world over. Feminism doesn’t make you strong. It doesn’t make you powerful. It doesn’t make you free. And it sure as hell doesn’t make you equal. It just makes you despicable.

Wait, weren’t you just complaining that feminism is about female supremacy? Now you’re admitting that it’s actually about equality – and you’re preaching male supremacy in its place?

Abandon feminism. Here’s a 12-step program for recovering feminists. There are others.

Ok, here we go.

1. Don’t be narcissistic. Never think you’re more important than men or children. Marketing departments delight in exploiting the feminist fallacy that you are. They promote ‘women’s only’ this and that, and women have bought into it. This appears sexist but it is really a marketing ploy that works because most women are narcissistic. Companies know they can charge more for goods and services by using the words ‘women only’. Narcissistic women are easily exploitable women. Be neither.

Huh. Isn’t the Men’s Rights Movement all about exploiting the narcissism of men who think they’re more important than women? (And children – at least in the case of the MRAs who whine endlessly about how unfair it is they can’t financially abandon their kids.)

2. Don’t let others make choices for you. This should be self-evident but for most of your life you’ve allowed yourself to be told what to wear, what to buy, what to eat, how to dress, where to go, how to think – in clubs, gyms, magazines, websites, books, stores and by TV talk show hosts. You’ve ‘needed’ a step-by-step guide through life, which you’ve followed with your sisters like sheep. Companies have exploited this need. Behave like a sheep if you must but obey the sheepdog, not the wolf. Better yet, be a woman who can think for herself.

… so long as “thinking for yourself” means “thinking you’re inferior to men and generally thinking the way men who hate women want you to.”

3. Get rid of the self-induced schizophrenia. Don’t insist you’re strong, confident, capable and independent one minute, then weak, frightened and vulnerable the next, especially when you’ve been caught doing something wrong. Don’t chop and change whenever it suits you – learn about who you are and be true. Admit when you’ve done something wrong. Don’t suddenly remember that you suffered abuse in the past or have some kind of mental illness or other instability, then use it to get yourself off. If you never sought help for these problems before you were caught, don’t use them as an excuse afterwards. Accept responsibility for yourself.

And for everything bad that men do as well, as manospherians repeatedly insist. If men are violent, it’s because women (allegedly) like dating violent men. If men brutalize the women in their life, it’s because the women provoke them. If a man arms himself with high-powered weapons and massacres children, his mom is to the real villain. For manospherians and MRAs generally, “responsiblity” means “a woman is always to blame.”

4. Don’t let the law take responsibility for crimes women commit. Speak out against women routinely receiving shorter sentences than men for the same crimes. If the law punishes women as it does children, treat them like children and encourage others to do so too. Don’t call these women ‘victims’ and say “they’ve suffered enough” because they’re women. Believe in, and stand up for, equal justice on the basis of gender.

Women do tend to receive shorter sentences than men for the same crimes. But this isn’t the fault of feminism. Indeed, female judges are slightly more likely to give women harsher sentence than male judges, possibly reflecting paternalistic attitudes on the part of male judges.

5. Don’t believe everything women and feminised men in the media tell you. Many serve up slop by the bucket – celebrity gossip, slimming tips, sex tips, man-shaming tips, rape and abuse lies, etc. TV shows like Oprah and Dr Phil are filled with advice on how women can transform themselves into victims and blame everything on men, while constantly ridiculing them. Partake of more nutritious fare than this. Get your infotainment from equitable programs. Be aware of the cultural status quo from both perspectives.

I have no idea what Jacob here would consider an “equitable” program, but, really, no one of any gender should be getting life advice from Dr. Phil.

6. Don’t fake solidarity with other women, especially in public. Don’t pretend that all women are your best friends when everyone knows nothing could be further from the truth. Openly acknowledge the reality that women despise each other unless there’s personal advantage in not doing so. Most good men can see through these attempts at deception, so lies won’t travel far. Don’t be a liar, especially not an obvious one.

I have no idea what the fuck he’s going on about here. “Don’t fake solidarity with other women, especially in public??” Do women who hate each other march around Jacob’s neighborhood arm-in-arm, pretending to be BFFs and singing the Lady Internationale? (“Arise, you prisoners of menstruation …  .“)

7. Don’t seek equality with men. Masculinity and femininity are inherently different. They are neither equals nor opposites, but different parts of the sexual continuum that can’t be defined from each other. Actively separate masculinity from femininity, and separate both from the sexual politics that keep them in healthy tension. Don’t claim women can do anything men can do until you start producing your own sperm.

Um, what? Is Kate Bush not a brilliant musician because she doesn’t have balls? Is Joan Didion not a brilliant writer because she can’t jizz into a sock?

Not every sperm producer is sacred.

8. Don’t demonize male sexuality or the male sex. Both sexes can be evil, both can be virtuous. Empathy, wisdom, grace, mercy, compassion and love are all as masculine as they are feminine. Don’t invaginate our boys by shaming or medicating the masculinity out of them before it matures and don’t impregnate them with the corrosive lie that being a woman is like being a man only better. Male sexuality is a pearl to be cultured. Suffuse your sons egos with promise if you want your daughters to have good men to love.

Uh, “invaginate?” Invaginate means to “be turned inside out or folded back on itself to form a cavity or pouch.” I’m pretty sure that teaching boys not to rape their dates does not in any way, literally or figuratively, turn them into a pouch.

9. Respect the sanctuaries of men. Men are judged much more harshly than women so they need their safe retreat. They don’t have the same opportunities for emotional support as women so they need a place where they can express themselves free of judgment and ridicule. This place must be respected. Take care if you venture there as your feminine narcissism is the enemy. Don’t draw attention to yourself and don’t expect protection if you do. If you must speak don’t attempt to control the dialogue or steer it towards you. Don’t censor language to suit your sensitivities. Male sanctuary is sacred – treat it as you would a cathedral.

Dudes, if you want to start your own little clubhouses where you can call women “cunts” in peace and quiet, go ahead and do it. Just don’t pretend they’re about anything more than misogyny. And if you put these allegedly sacred sanctuaries on the internet, don’t be surprised if some people take offence. Oh, and don’t claim that, say, video games, or STEM fields, or atheism, or whatever male-heavy thing you’re into, is a “male sanctuary” that need to be protected from evil girl germs.

Some male spaces can be totally awesome:

Others, not so awesome.

10. Don’t use shaming tactics. Don’t accuse men of having anger management issues when they’re angry at injustice. Don’t accuse them of being a threat when they call you out for being a bigot or a tyrant. Don’t accuse them of having a fear of commitment when they’re merely making a choice between bravery and stupidity. Don’t assess the merit of their arguments on the basis of their attractiveness to you. Don’t attribute their views about women to past disappointments when it is merely an objective assessment of your sex. Shaming tactics are remnants of childhood so leave them in the nursery if you want to be taken seriously.

I think this one just broke the irony meter. It’s not like manosphere dudes ever use shaming language aimed at anyone.

A word of warning here. The next paragraph is the worst one in the whole manifesto, and, honestly, one of the worst things I’ve run across in my more than two years of doing this blog. TRIGGER WARNING for rape apologia.

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11. Be honest about sexual harassment. If you assert that you have the right to dress as you please and that men should be able to control their sexuality, honour their right to be shielded from yours. If you don’t want men to control themselves but instead want to control their loss of control for your own enjoyment, be prepared for the consequences when things go awry. If ‘harassment’ – the stares, sexual innuendos, sly touches, and even rape – magically cease to be harassment and become the foundations of a passionate new romance occasionally, admit that you don’t really want men to control themselves. Don’t expect men to know when it’s right to ‘harass’ you and when it’s not. Don’t treat Man one minute as an exciting and courageous hero and the next a monster intent on tyranny and abuse if you’re inconsistent in your sexual intentions and desires.

Woah. Let’s take another look at that especially terrible comment in the middle of that mess:

If ‘harassment’ – the stares, sexual innuendos, sly touches, and even rape – magically cease to be harassment and become the foundations of a passionate new romance occasionally, admit that you don’t really want men to control themselves.

I’ve got no jokes for this one. You honestly think that RAPE can be “the foundation of a passionate new romance?” What the fuck is wrong with you?

12. Speak out against misandry. The main reason for its proliferation is that women have remained silent. Silence in the face of injustice is cowardly. It has allowed loud, obnoxious women to preach hatred with impunity, which has reflected badly on all women. When you speak out against misandry you do all women a favour. Don’t be a misandrist, don’t be a coward and don’t be silent.

At this point, I really don’t think I need to bother to point out the hypocrisy here.

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Posted on February 10, 2013, in a woman is always to blame, antifeminism, atheism, block that metaphor, domestic violence, entitled babies, evil sexy ladies, evil single moms, evil women, excusing abuse, girl germs, grandiosity, hypocrisy, irony alert, men who should not ever be with women ever, misandry, misogyny, MRA, narcissism, no girls allowed, oppressed men, playing the victim, precious bodily fluids, pussy pass, rapey, reactionary bullshit, sexual harassment, single mothers, the sound of his own voice. Bookmark the permalink. 684 Comments.

  1. thebewilderness – yup, there’s a bit of sockwhiff here, especially the “respectful” shite. Like coming in sneering at feminism or feminists is respectful. ::rolls eyes::

  2. Hey, if anyone is suffering from insomnia he might come in handy.

  3. Misogynist is just another label like Troll. Julia Gillard labelled Tony Abbott a Misognyist and he went on to win the Australian election. It’s all just water off a ducks back. What I’m really interested in is if any of you have the ability to use actual reason rather than scorn, mockery and all the other bullying tactics you seem to take a perverse pleasure in. There seems to be a lot of anger issues here.

  4. It must be time to hit him with kitty vids.

  5. thebewilderness

    Yet another troll failed to read the name of the blog he is trolling.

  6. followtable: can you read and understand the header of this site?

    You don’t get to set terms around here.

    Oh dear, the troll thinks we’re angry. He hasn’t seen us when we’re angry.

  7. Is he going to call us mentally ill after the anger issues thing?

  8. Oh dear, looks like middle school speech class just got out.

  9. LOL like being a misogynist has ever stopped a man winning an election (in which, btw, he didn’t defeat Gillard, but Rudd).

    Words have meaning, child. Go learn ‘em.

  10. OK, I’m not one for banging my head against a brick wall so I’m just going to let you go about changing the world. Keep up the good work!

  11. We haven’t had “you’re all fat” or “fascism!” yet, so I think he has a while to go.

  12. Stick the flounce! Points will be deducted for returning!

  13. He never did get to “have fun dying alone with your cats.”

  14. thebewilderness

    1.5 for effort
    .5 for content

  15. thebewilderness

    Aaaaand let us hope he sticks the flounce.

  16. They could at least make it more interesting and fantasize about the cats eating the corpse or something.

  17. “He hasn’t seen us when we’re angry.”

    He won’t like it when we are angry…

  18. Yeah, honestly, I can’t give that more than 2/10 either.

  19. He copied that entire wall o’ text from Psychology Today. LOL.

  20. neuroticbeagle – is that a Soylent Green person? :O

  21. He’d probably been waiting a long time to drop that turd. Too bad it was our punchbowl.

  22. But what about the barrel?

  23. Kittehs: I believe that’s She-Hulk.

  24. hellkell – oh, cool! :)

  25. But what about the barrel?

    You mean the small container?

  26. @kittehs
    It’s the best image I got when I typed “feminist hulk” into pinterest search.

  27. Speaking of Soylent Green, I saw some hilarious takes on it yesterday:

  28. This is angry? Cuz I thought y’all were some combo of bored and amused and such.

    And yeah, that flounce is a 2, tops.

  29. So random question. If you find trolls to be amusing and enjoy interacting with them on a certain level, does that mean that you’re playing into their hands, or that they’re playing into yours? I can never tell. On the one hand, you’re providing sustenance to whatever thought cancer drives them on, but on the other, they’re really funny… what? I just like to laugh at people sometimes. Also, lurkers read what’s written and, regardless of the intent of the troll, are informed by the discourse, even if one half of that discourse is utterly vapid.

    (And since when were “troll” and “capable of blatantly copying and pasting academic articles” mutually exclusive?)
    (And, for bonus points, why does coming here seem like a good way to deal with being unable to sleep?)

  30. Athywren: I can’t speak for others, but I like poking them until they burst.

    I’m not overly concerned with what lurkers may or may not take away from the discourse.

  31. Athywren – sometimes I can’t be bothered with trolls (mostly, these days) but mocking/tearing ‘em to bits seems a better idea than ignoring them, in many ways. They’re not going to stop being misogynistic fuckshites whether we respond or not, so like you said – better for lurkers to read what we have to say, and for us to point and laugh at them, or tell them just how foul they are, whichever is appropriate. (Sometimes both, as in “penguin whores” and rape advocate Tommyboy.)

  32. Me? I have a case of XKCD Duty Calls. They are wrong, therefore I will tell them how wrong they are.

    Of course, it really is a duty in a way, as this is how I got inducted into Sir Pecunium’s Royal Assassins.

  33. Wow, if trolls have such thin skins to think that “bored amusement” is equal to anger, what would they call actual anger?

  34. Argenti – xkcd’s Duty Calls is my life’s motto on the Internet. :P

  35. Some trolls are hilarious and others are a bore. As long as anyone is finding them amusing then I say feed away.

  36. thebewilderness

    Most trolls don’t just want the attention, they want people to engage with them.
    Mocking without engaging seems to be the most effective response.

  37. I like hellkell’s image of poking them until they burst. Where’s a webcam when you need one?

  38. I don’t think it would be terrible if there was no serious communication to give lurkers anything informative, but where there’s the opportunity, it’s always worth putting it out there. Plus the joy of the XKCD Duty… it’s better than cake.
    Anyways, Tired has made his return to my brain weasels, so g’night again.

  39. Sir Bodsworth Rugglesby III

    Troll: If you give me a response, I win!

    Everyone: Here’s our response, asspain

    Troll: …So why don’t I feel like a winner?

  40. @Kittehs
    I like the first picture you found best.

  41. So why don’t I feel like a winner?

    Story of their lives, really.

  42. I know the thread has moved on, but the story about English being lacking because we only have one word for blue is cracking me up.

    If only we could distinguish between different kinds of blue!

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Shades_of_blue

  43. followtable: I would prefer you attempted to be reasonable and respectful. I would do the same for you.

    You’ve not been reasonable. Don’t pretend that being an asshole who avoids “bad” language = being reasonable you weaselly little fuck.

    And, I like to feed trolls. You’ve come to a place that knows how.

    So put on your bib, and get ready to tuck in. We’re about to have a blueberry pie eating contest.

  44. Regarding blue: Yeah, russian has two color values where we have one (because the idea behind goluboi, and sinie are fundamentally different), but the conclusions being drawn from them (at present) are weak, and often being used as a stalking horse to defend the Chomskian ideas of, “deep grammar”.

    Given that Whorf was expanding on Sapir, and Sapir had some methodological problems (to be very forgiving), the write up of a paper based on those factors is, from a probative standpoint more than a little suspect.

    Anyone who would use it, without expanding on the material, loses pretty much all credibility with me, because they are either too stupid/ill informed on the issues to be credible, or have an agenda they choose to hide, and hope the use of a masking article will hide the fact the palmed cards and so grant a cachet of respectability to a position which is far from settled in the discipline of linguistics.

    (was that “rational” enough for you to accept as being free of ad hom, you ignorant little fuck-faced twit?)

  45. The pie eating contest!

    And Mr. Rational won’t even have to pay to get in :)

  46. “I think this one just broke the irony meter. It’s not like manosphere dudes ever use shaming language aimed at anyone.”

    Tu quoque /tuːˈkwoʊkwiː/,[1] (Latin for “you, too” or “you, also”) or the appeal to hypocrisy, is a logical fallacy that attempts to discredit the opponent’s position by asserting the opponent’s failure to act consistently in accordance with that position; it attempts to show that a criticism or objection applies equally to the person making it. This dismisses someone’s point of view based on criticism of the person’s inconsistency and not the position presented[2] whereas a person’s inconsistency should not discredit the position. Thus, it is a form of the ad hominem argument.[3]

  47. Wow, this guy is a real piece of garbage. The rape justification is chilling. He needs to be removed from society before he hurts someone.

  48. How about……individuals are individuals…regardless of sex…and we should stop treating either misogyny or misandry as either fictional or covers-all practices? Jesus Christ.

  49. emilygoddess - MOD

    Ugh, “egalitarians”

  50. ……individuals are individuals…

    And a horse is a horse, of course, of course, but neither of these tautologies is terribly useful when you’re experiencing misogyny.

  51. What a completely original and wise comment. Why, I’ve never heard of that before! Who knew that all this time if I just stuck my fingers in my ears and “la la la can’t hear you!” loudly enough all the entrenched power or privileged groups would just poof be gone and we could all be equal!?

    Thank you Matt for showing us that such a utopia is possible. You are a true visionary.

  52. Oh, Matt. Bless your heart, honey.

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