“This is female privilege” is comedy gold! [UPDATED with links]
This doesn’t ever actually happen.
My new favorite terrible Tumblr blog is this is female privilege, a blog that posts user-submitted examples of, well, female privilege. It’s a pretty MRA-adjacent idea for a blog, seemingly designed to be appreciated only by those who can use the word “misandry” without giggling. The woman who runs the blog seems to be fairly MRA-adjacent type herself; she recently responded to one critic with a sarcastic “Wow waahhhh it’s so hard to be a woman wahhhh!” (Literally; that’s an exact quote.)
So it’s hardly surprising that many of the posts seem to have been cut and pasted straight from the Men’s Rights subreddit – at least figuratively, if not literally. (Click on the pics to see the posts in context at this is female privilege.)
But a lot of the alleged privileges are a bit, well, odder than that. The blogger says she posts everything she gets, so either a lot of people have pretty cockeyed notions of just what privileges are, or some feminists are trolling her blog by sending along the dumbest non-privileges they can think of to make the blog even more ridiculous than it already is.
Some suggest that biological differences are “privileges.”
Some of the so-called “privileges” are the results of traditional gender roles that box both men and women in:
Dude, if you want to shave your body hair, shave your fucking body hair. There are lots of guys who shave or wax.
Some are comically delusional:
Chance this last one was submitted by a guy: 110%.
Some are just kind of whiny.
You know, there’s an easy solution to this: wait for a fucking stall, like women do.
Some are kind of weird:
And some are just, well, beyond hope:
Seriously, if you see these things as female privilege, you really, really shouldn’t be talking about privilege in public on the internet. You’re just making a fool of yourself.
The one redeeming thing about the blog: people argue back in the “notes.”
EDIT: Another redeeming thing: It’s inspired the response blog Actually This is Male Privilege.
EDIT 2: Amanda Marcotte riffs on the one about women having the wonderful privilege of sex any time they want!
Posted on July 18, 2012, in antifeminism, creepy, drama kings, FemRAs, idiocy, irony alert, misandry, misogyny, MRA, narcissism, oppressed men, penises. Bookmark the permalink. 454 Comments.
http://thisisfemaleprivilege.tumblr.com/post/27069514112/female-privilege-is-boobs
I think this one is my favorite.
Polliwog: That’s beautiful. :-D
Being kicked in the crotch hurts pretty bad no matter what you’ve got going on down there, seriously.
Yeah, having been kicked in the crotch once, I can testify to the fact that my reaction was pretty much identical to the typical reaction of male movie characters, etc. to being kicked in the crotch. It’s not like vulvas are armor-plated or something; they’re just in a somewhat less-easily-kickable location.
In other news, this may be even better than BOOBS:
http://thisisfemaleprivilege.tumblr.com/post/27038230152/female-privilege-is-getting-to-vajazzle-your
Dudes, you are totally allowed to glue little spangly fake gemstones to your wangs if it makes you happy. I promise there is not a feminist conspiracy to keep you from dickjazzling.
Female privilege is SCENTED FUCKING CANDLES.
http://thisisfemaleprivilege.tumblr.com/post/27344560519/oh-my-god-biological-differences-between-men-and-women
Female privilege =/= social justice
Shoes made of paper that melt in mud puddles had never crossed my mind as a female privilege. Particularly when combined with whale bone corsets and forty pounds of garments.
I do not think that word, privilege, means what they think it means.
Male privilege is being able to pee standing up! So there!
It’s not like vulvas are armor-plated or something – Polliwog
I tried to think of something witty to say.. but all I could think of was this.
(That’s SFW btw :P ).
Women who do not conform to standard beauty expectations also face rejection and also find themselves going home alone after a night at the bar. SCIENCE (if you add that at the end it’s automatically proven).
Oh, and these assholes whining about women making more in the porn industry are such twits! As has been pointed out in previous threads: the overwhelmingly male-led industry that produces these videos makes far more than any of the actors do, including them women. Reminds me of Chris Rock’s routine about basketball players and how their millions in profits are dwarfed by the profits of the old white men who own the teams.
She elaborates:
I thought that ““Wow waahhhh it’s so hard to be a woman wahhhh!” was your characterization of her response. No. It’s her exact response, word for word.
So, how long before someone mentions the Titanic? I’m taking bets.
Polliwog: You don’t UNDERSTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND, if I dickjazzle it’ll be weird and uncomfortable during sex!
… The obvious solution is to balljazzle.
I thought that
was your characterization of her response. No. It’s an exact quotation.
Would it be wrong to make some fake submissions? After dealing with Tom Martin and Steele, I feel that my moral compass no longer points to true north (or even magnetic north).
http://thisisfemaleprivilege.tumblr.com/post/27344560519/oh-my-god-biological-differences-between-men-and-women
“This is not a social justice blog.”
At least they admit it?
There’s a response tumblr called Actually This is Male Privilege: http://actuallythisismaleprivilege.tumblr.com
@cloudiah
We could edit some of NWOslave’s more bizarre rants and submit them. Or would that be wrong?
@creativewritingstudent Seriously, I don’t know any more. I’m going to go watch some kitten videos to try to reboot. :-)
http://actuallythisismaleprivilege.tumblr.com/post/27333741572/actually
^ This one is kinda pertinent to me and one of my friends atm. I recently chopped a lot of my hair off and was worried that Mum would freak and say I looked like a ‘lesbian’. (You know, the disapproving-tone ‘lesbian’.) She didn’t, but when saying ‘I want to cut my hair short’, one of her responses was ‘you don’t want to look like a lesbian!’*. The other was ‘your partner might not approve, you’d have to check because you’d be upset if he cut his hair off.’**
My friend wants a ‘shaved part’ and her mother tells her it will make her look like a ‘lesbian’, and her mother also tells her that her chosen nickname is a ‘lesbian name’. (wat.)
* Seeing as I lack an identical gay twin, this would be impossible.
** I will admit I find his long hair extra sexy, but its his hair. Turns out he doesn’t care what I do with my hair as long as I keep dying it red.
[/rant]
See, what I do when I want to look neat (being a long-haired guy) is… tie it back. It seems to suffice.
(Normally I’m too lazy to do that, and I probably get less comments and such for having scruffy uncombed hair than a woman would.)
didnt buttman used to get really worked up about urinals?
also, mens rooms still have stalls. if you dont want to use a urinal you dont have to.
So in fact urinals help even the men who don’t want to use them, because the queues will be shorter due to the men who are OK with using them doing so…
These blogs will provide me with much needed entertainment over the next day or so.
Hey! I play croquet in public all the time, but I get made fun of! Especially when I miss and the ball rolls into someone’s foot. Also that police officer tried to confiscate my mallet. It was very sad.
(Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
Aww, you can’t ask anonymously. :(
Oh for the love of…
It’d be a nice privilege if women could turn it off occasionally.
Also, if you look female but not “sexy,” you get to hear passerby’s opinion on that, too.
It is sort of a silly blog but it should be titled “How gender roles hurt men as well”. Men die earlier than women as a result of the stress to not show emotion and “handle it like a man”
If a woman cries and gets emotional it is okay but if a man does he is considered a “sissy”. A man that stays home and takes care of the children while his wife works is still considered weird.
The current Mens Rights Movement is all about Mens Liberation from the constraints of their gender role.Men are still required in America to register for the military draft and risk their lives while women are not.
By the way I happen to go to Hooters not for the female waitresses but I like their chicken wings. Their food is darn good,Good burgers too. I have seen women eating at Hooters as well.
A lot of the MRM stuff really doesn’t look like it’s interested in building equality… I do believe that rigid gender roles are shitty for everyone. Let’s take the draft as an example! It’s a frequently-pointed-out point that a lot of feminists argue that that the draft should be abolished or universalised; in my country, women aren’t allowed to serve as front-line infantry, and feminists here are working on changing that so women would be allowed to take their share of the load there, too.
Seriously? I’ve been to a Hooters restaurant. I’d never go back. That food was terrible. Who likes making a living serving awful food?
I thought “Female privilege is BOOBS” was the ultimate, but then I saw “Female privilege is multiple orgasms.” Why must we oppress men so?
Somewhere in there is a potentially useful conversation about how Patriarchy Oppresses Men Too, and feminists want men to feel more comfortable knitting, doing housework, and going dutch on dates. But, given that the recent posts are all the same boring child custody/abortion rights/circumcision is oppression/women never want to date me and it’s not faaaair stuff we’ve seen a million times here, it looks like the MRAs drowned it out pretty much immediately.
As to the military: As a woman I wouldn’t join until 1. the whole incidence of rape/sexual assault and harassment goes way down and is better-dealt-with. 2. I could serve on the front lines (such as they are in current wars. Let’s say infantry). Naturally, my somewhat-traditionally-minded partner (who is a recruiter as I’ve mentioned) goes off on long rants about the trubbles of wimminz in combats.
As to Hooters? I know some Hooter’s girls who absolutely hate where they work, and get harassed a lot, but are sort of stuck cause the money is decent, and where else can some of them find comparable pay in this economy, OR, can’t get places to take them seriously as job candidates with Hooter’s Girl on their resume. And some of these girls have their bachelor’s degrees. Does this completely cancel out her example of Happy Hooters Girls being female privilege? (Also does it not occur to them that companies like Hooter’s and Tilted Kilt exist mainly for Teh Dudez? WHOLE COMPANIES CATER TO STEREOTYPICAL MALE DESIRES.)
2-D Man – I would guess that the tips at Hooters are way better than at your average restaurant in that price range, so long as you’ve got the right body type and can fake the persona convincingly.
(Yes, female privilege to get better tips, whatever, just think of how much more power the guys paying those tips have.)
MGTOWMRA: Yes, gender roles hurt men too, and feminism addresses that too (if only indirectly: as a byproduct of their work in addressing the gender roles that hurt women). Gender roles hurt men, but they hurt women more. Hence, priorities; hence the term “feminism”.
The Men’s Rights Movement, in practice, is about opposing that; it’s about those who benefit from the status quo defending the status quo under the pretense of activism. It’s MRAs who make a point of enforcing the very man-harming gender roles you (and they) claim they fight against.
Feminists fight primarily for women, but their brothers are not forgotten. Their work in fighting for women can also benefit men; this is a feature, not a bug. MRAs fight only for men; for them, any benefit for women is a bug, not a feature.
Do you know the difference between a nice guy and a Nice Guy? Likewise, there’s a difference between Men’s Rights Activists (who call themselves MRAs) and men’s rights activists (who call themselves feminists).
I stand with men by standing with women. That’s how I see it, anyway.
I should add that said catering is not, well, very *flattering*? But still. There are dudes whole sign onto those stereotypes wholesale and are all sorts of excited about Hooters, etc. And it exists for them to go and enjoy in that way.
Cliff: Some of the Hooters girls I know make *really* good money. BUT. they also get most of that from their “regulars”, and they sort of have to put up with some very weird, condescending crap from them. Their weight, level of tan-ness, hair, and makeup are also very policed. I mean, they make money, yeah, but the guys giving those tips had the money for it in the first placed, plus, the girls can get kind of a rough deal from the managers, and people also treat them like they’re stupid a lot, too. One of the girls I know who bartends there ended up starting therapy and a course of anti-depressants to deal with the stress of it. It’s intense.
While I don’t disagree with your basic premise – enforced gender roles absolutely do hurt men, too – I think you may underestimate how much crap is dished out to women in the same vein. Using your examples here, it’s absolutely true that, if I cry in public, I will not be accused of being a “sissy.” I will instead be accused of being hysterical, irrational, and a “typical woman,” and have this used as a reason to dismiss anything I say. It’s absolutely true that, if I choose to become a stay-at-home mom, I will not be considered “weird.” I will, however, frequently be considered stupid and useless, not to mention being blamed for anything less-than-perfect about my hypothetical children.
The thing is, almost all the gender-policing crap inflicted on men – and don’t get me wrong, it IS crap and it absolutely sucks – boils down to “don’t act like a GIRL, because girls are terrible.” Which means that women deal with the exact same crap, but for us, it’s “don’t act like YOU, because YOU are terrible, no matter what you do.”
When I knit in public, I tend to get reactions, particularly from men. Often, they take the form of “oh, you women and your silly, frivolous woman things. You’re so cute!”
Or, put another way: a man might be laughed at for doing needle/textile crafts in public, because he’s perceived to be behaving in a shallow, vapid, womanly way; instead of a serious, manly way. I get condescending approval for the same behaviour because I’m meeting the expectation that I will be vapid and shallow, and spend my time doing useless things.
It’s worth noting that hobbies less associated with women are not judged to be useless in this same way.
Cliff – The rhetorical question was more centered around professional pride than ‘how much money does it take to get you to put up with that’. Working at Hooters could only be a female privilege if women, when asked, ‘where do you work?’ proudly responded with, ‘Hooters.’ I don’t think that actually happens very often.
I suppose I could be wrong about that. (And I kinda hope so.)
ummmm men can work at hooters……they have male bussers, cooks, managers, they just can’t be servers. But you know what…let them! IF men want to wear short shorts and a shirt that says hooters across their chest..let them do it! Somehow, I doubt there would be many volenteers=P Also, to counter her antedotes I had a friend that worked at hooters. She burned her lip on a tanning bed and they told ehr she couldn’t work like that….This would NEVER happen at any other resteraunt. The Hooters in West Covina, CA also gets sued a lot for sexual harrasment…not seeing any female privlage there
On a slightly more happy note: my mum’s quite keen on knitting (and has learnt to spin fleece into fibre), and frequently points out that should the zombie apocalypse come and civilisation collapse, she can still make clothes.
Knitting is awesome.
“Please wait an hour before submitting any more posts.”
Aw man. 33:
Well, that was fun. Hopefully an hour will have passed by the time I get back home.
I wonder which ones will be posted, and what will happen to my black and disabled “privilege” submits????????
@alantas
it’s weird, there’s a dude who’s leaving the organization i work for to do a phd with a masculinity studies focus, and not only are none of the feminists here (which is to say, everyone) criticizing or belittling him, everyone has pretty universally said ‘your ideas sound cool as shit’
I mis-read that as “has learnt to spin fleece into fire” (maybe influenced the appearance of the words “zombie apocalypse” later in your comment, and thought THAT IS SO AWESOME.
It IS still awesome, though, and potentially just as useful when civilization collapses.
@Polliwog:
“The thing is, almost all the gender-policing crap inflicted on men – and don’t get me wrong, it IS crap and it absolutely sucks – boils down to “don’t act like a GIRL, because girls are terrible.” Which means that women deal with the exact same crap, but for us, it’s “don’t act like YOU, because YOU are terrible, no matter what you do.””
A-fucking-men.
Looking back, I can trace my feminist stance today to being friends to guys years ago (some I’m still friends with) who very much want/ed to do things and live outside gender norms. Trying to be supportive of them made me realize how asinine and arbitrary the gender boxes are in the first place.
Now I’ve kind of “circled back,” as it were, to focusing on women and women’s experiences as a part of supporting my friends (male and female) in bucking gender roles.
@MorkaisChosen-
Knitting is awesome, particularly when having knitted wool socks is the difference between getting your foot cut off from frost bite or not. No zombie apocalypse needed where I’m from to be grateful to people like your mom. Tell her she’s awesome!
:-D
Where we live it’s less likely to save limbs, but I’ll pass that on.!
I find it strange that “getting kicked in the genitals” which can happen to anyone, by the ways, is presented as the ultimate pain. Like, the mras try to present it as the worst kind of pain ever, and say that it only happens to men, so… female privilege somehow?
There are plenty of things more painful than getting kicked in the genitals, is part of what I’m saying. Kidney stones, for one.
Also also, I’ve worked as a server before. Hooters or not, it’s just not a privileged position. It’s a miserable job.
I’d guess having acid thrown on you can be more painful than being kicked in the balls. :-(
David, are you sure that site isn’t satirical? Most of the examples of female privilege on there are too ridiculous for it to be serious. Then again, I wouldn’t be surprised if it is serious. MRAs and their sympathizers aren’t known for having a firm grasp on reality.
Now, I’m not saying that women don’t have any privileges related to being female, but those “examples” are just fucking stupid.
I don’t know about y’all, but I definitely feel privileged having the option to work for minimum wage at a place where guys will stare at my tits and grope my ass all day. Besides, men work at Hooters too, dumbass.
Perhaps because women don’t have prostates? Men don’t have to be tested for uterine cancer, so does that make us even?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…
Yeah…being kneed in the crotch hurts like hell. The pubic bone should not be rammed against other hard objects, generally speaking.
(On the other hand, I can still make my fiance turn red and stammer when I mention that one)
muwahahahahaha :-D
So if it’s female privilege never to be tested for prostate cancer, is it male privilege never to be tested for uterine or ovarian cancer?
Well, if it wasn’t satirical before, it sure will be now…
The thing about that picture that annoys me, is the man is laying out his coat for the woman to step over because she is rich, not simply because she is a woman. I doubt he would do the same for the chambermaid that scrubs his sheets. He definitely would not do that for the female slave working in the fields. That quote from Sojourner Truth comes to mind. A few rich women enjoyed an extraordinary lifestyle, but most women were poor and working themselves to death. Stupid stupid stupid.
There are a couple good ones, but most of the good ones use either a common (as opposed to an activist’s definition which if I recall tends to be rooted in historical precedent, “power structure” analysis, etc.) definition of “privilege” or hit on the “man box” notion.
Neither of these are necessarily bad, but I am not entirely sure that “being free from certain societal expectations of the opposite gender” counts as privilege. It might lead to a form of privilege, but alone it doesn’t feel sufficient.
@Polliwog
“While I don’t disagree with your basic premise – enforced gender roles absolutely do hurt men, too – I think you may underestimate how much crap is dished out to women in the same vein. Using your examples here, it’s absolutely true that, if I cry in public, I will not be accused of being a “sissy.” I will instead be accused of being hysterical, irrational, and a “typical woman,” and have this used as a reason to dismiss anything I say. It’s absolutely true that, if I choose to become a stay-at-home mom, I will not be considered “weird.” I will, however, frequently be considered stupid and useless, not to mention being blamed for anything less-than-perfect about my hypothetical children.”
Hallelujah.
When people ignore everything you have to say, or outright dismiss it as irrational simply because you have a vagina, talk to me about female privilege.
When you are the most qualified person in the room, but you have to find a man to say what you want said because no one takes your extpertise seriuosly because you have a vagina, talk to me about female privilege.
When nobody gives a shit about what you contribute to society because you aren’t “hot,” talk to me about female privilege.
When half of the population can physically overpower and rape you, so you have to always have to watch your back when traveling alone or at night, talk to me about female privilege.
When you are called a “bitch” for being assertive, confident, or just anything besides sweet and accomodating, talk to me about female privilege.
When people call you a cocktease when you won’t sleep with a man, and a slut when you will, talk to me about female privilege.
If these MRAs had to go through one day experiencing the level of disrespect, objectification, and condescension women face simply for being women, they would really have something to be mad about.
So, skinny weak men. This is just as true of the bottom percentiles of men.
So far, so MRA.
But people just don’t think that about men. The fact that people think about the fact that women can be physically forced into rape is a fact the like of which men just don’t have to contend with. That’s where a whole pile of victim-blaming and bullshit comes from.
Small framed men can still be incredibly strong. So yes, some men can be overpowered by other men. But very very few men can be overpowered by a woman. And like you said, I don’t think a man ever anticipates being raped by another man while he’s walking down a dark street, because he’s a MAN. And that attitude hurts men.
I actually think there IS one of those female privilege ones that’s vaguely on point (http://actuallythisismaleprivilege.tumblr.com/post/27449796831/actually)
“Female privilege is not being expected to get a professional career and take on all the challenges thereof”
It’s definitely true that unambitious men are heavily looked-down-upon as “losers” in our society. I wouldn’t put TOO fine a point on it because most people are vaguely ambitious, but the flip side to the male privilege of heightened career success is that the men who lose at the success game do frequently get pretty emasculated.
@MorkaisChosen
“So far, so MRA.”
What does this mean?
Atlantas commented MGTOWMRA: Yes, gender roles hurt men too, and feminism addresses that too (if only indirectly: as a byproduct of their work in addressing the gender roles that hurt women). Gender roles hurt men, but they hurt women more. Hence, priorities; hence the term “feminism”.
Atlantas I disagree, gender roles severely hurt men as much as women. Men still die a couple of years before women and much of it is a result of men not being allowed to cry, show emotion or express their feelings.More men statistically succumb to alcoholism and drug addiction because of this as well. Men dying a couple of years before women is a severe consequence of gender roles hurting men.
Polliwog it is not necessarily true that you will be considered stupid and useless by men if you are a stay at home mom. There are conservative men such as Bill Bennett who wrote an offensive book to MRA’s called “Man Up”, who revere stay at home moms. Check out this link http://www.the-spearhead.com/2011/10/05/reader-responses-to-bill-bennetts-man-up-piece/
There are lots of MRA’S on good websites such as The Spearhead, A Voice for men, and The Good Men Project who believe that women should be drafted in the military and fight on the front lines in a war and men should be allowed to knit in public without shame and ridicule.
MRA’s believe gender roles hurt men very much. A good book to read is “Loving men, Respecting Women” by Tim Goldich. If some people say feminism is all about equality for men as well as women.in terms of gender roles, the term “feminist” is offensive to me as an MRA. I would prefer the term “equalism” rather than “feminism”
This article talks about how crying women are judged more harshly than crying men are. And when Ellen DeGeneres cried on her talk show, which was around the time of the last election, Bill Maher used that as “proof” that a woman should not be president.
YooHooCthulu – I don’t think “not being expected to succeed” is much of a privilege at all.
@Yoohoo: “Female privilege is not being expected to get a professional career and take on all the challenges thereof”
No, it’s more like women were until very recently barred from the education and employment of ANY professions (public school teaching and nursing were fairly low-level on the hierarchy of professions vs. jobs): I fucking remember when employment ads were for MALE and FEMALE.
And women were barred from all the PERKS that go along with those challenges — and if you think working jobs like motel maid and waitress don’t have ‘challenges’ and also lack the perks, you (generic you) are a know-nothing jerk.
That is not, and was not, privilege — and the “challenges” that women faced who wanted to work in these professions were a shitload harder than men faced.
Oh yeah. All those grandmas who outlived their husbands are having a fucking ball. Especially the penniless widows who werent allowed to hold a job. The ones who were legally abused by their partners in life but are, somehow, out of the market at 80. The ones who begged the love of their life to just get a fucking prostate exam already. Lucky bitches.
@Fembot: That was making the point that the first sentence was pretty much in line with stuff MRAs might say.
“Small framed men can still be incredibly strong. So yes, some men can be overpowered by other men. But very very few men can be overpowered by a woman. And like you said, I don’t think a man ever anticipates being raped by another man while he’s walking down a dark street, because he’s a MAN. And that attitude hurts men.”
This is the sort of thing I was meaning, yeah.
Okay some of those are definitely submissions from funny feminists.