Men oppressed by not being allowed to bitch about ladies in public restrooms
I'm pretty sure this happens more often than conversations in men's restrooms
A startling new development on the frontiers of anti-male oppression. According to the loquacious lady MRA known as girlwriteswhat on Reddit, men are being oppressed by evil feminist dudes cruelly clamping down on their right to bitch about ladies in the bathroom. In a recent comment she writes:
No space is allowed to be male-only, or male-viewpoint-only, but women insist on female-only or female-viewpoint-only spaces all the time.
The only male safe space left on the planet is the men’s bathroom, ffs. And even then, there will be feminist-leaning men policing what is said. It’s very frustrating.
As a dude feminist who is a regular user of men’s restrooms, I should note that dudes do not actually talk in restrooms.
Happily, this does not prevent me, as a dude feminist, from policing the non-existent speech of other dudes in said restrooms.
Here is the complete transcript of a restroom discussion I recently policed:
Dude One: [silently urinates]
Dude Two: [silently urinates]
Dude Three: [silently poops]
Me: Goddessdamnit, keep it down with all your lady-bashing! Men are bad!
Always glad to help.
HT to Shit Reddit Says, which has just ended its month-long moratorium on r/mensrights posts, for pointing me to girlwriteswhat’s observation.
Posted on February 1, 2012, in antifeminism, antifeminst women, bullying, I'm totally being sarcastic, misandry, MRA, oppressed men, reddit. Bookmark the permalink. 520 Comments.
[silently poops]
I’m jealous of Dude 3’s skills.
I’m wondering how many people converse in bathrooms in general. I’m guessing it mostly happens on TV and in movies.
Bathrooms full of strangers in public, yeah.
On a university campus,though, when friends leave a class and go to the bathroom together, there is talk!
ANd sometimes that talk is about the ladyprof who happens to be caught in the stall (or about her colleagues; I restrict the impulse to say, hey, check the stalls before complaining people)…..I assume same thing happens in men’s rooms, in between all the feminist men bashing other men, but I do not know through direct experience.
I’m wondering how much time she’s spending in the men’s room.
If I don’t have the ability to silence all dissent, I have no rights. Now, anyone who disagrees with me on anything, be quiet! XD
Most of my time is spent in men’s restrooms policing the speech of other men. Well, that and the glory hole.
The only “policing the speech of men” I can see going on the men’s room is washing off graffiti.
Or maybe crossing it out.
That’s not true. No mainstream Grand Lodge will acknowledge a Freemason lodge that allows women to be members. I know that MRA trolls claim that the Order of the Eastern Star is the same thing as a Masonic Lodge, but that’s not true. Women also are not allowed to join the Knights of Columbus, and again the ladies’ auxiliaries are not the same things. Finally, women are not allowed to become Catholic priests. There are plenty of spaces for men only besides men’s restrooms.
And she knows what dudes talk about in the bathroom how?
I talk to friends through the bathroom cubicle walls as we’re both going, but only those who I know are okay with it. Some people find it creepy, and I get that. We warn each other when foul smells are on the way, too.
There’s also golf at the Augusta National Golf Club. Women can’t go there either.
Exactly, Nobinayamu & Lady Zombie, how does she know this? Oh, pulling it out her ass, most likely while in the ladies’ room.
Well, since the rest of the world is still a safe space for most men, excuse me while I give this the consideration it deserves.
When will women like girlwriteswhat realize that sexists and MRAs really DON’T like the only girl in the treehouse?
@Hellkell:”When will women like girlwriteswhat realize that sexists and MRAs really DON’T like the only girl in the treehouse?”
Price wrote a Spearhead piece promoting her videos last week. Some of the comments were supportive, saying that it was important to have female allies in the MRM, others expressed skepticism that a woman could be trusted at all
http://www.the-spearhead.com/2012/01/18/women-weigh-in-on-mens-issues/
Opus: “What Man would make an MRM video dressed in a Low-Cut Top and wearing Lipstick and Mascara? (31 up, 14 down)
Rebel:
A woman within the MRM? NO GOOD! And I’ll tell you why: she only has to say nice words, the words we want to hear and… bingo!, she is in control! .. and the shepherd can bring the sheeps safely home…right? She can bring food on the table for the ladies”
(33 upvotes, 13 down)
I also want to mention Cuts Fitness for Men, before some MRA’s start whining about Curves. It’s a gym for men only. There are gender neutral gyms, too, for people that don’t want a gender segregated fitness center.
@ hellkell I admit that has always made me curious. Are the women who try to buddy up to the MRAs aware that they’re not really wanted on MRA blogs and websites? Well, except maybe as a virtual punching bag?
The women who post on the Spearhead are told really viscous things and if one of them complains about being called a cunt repeatedly, the others rush in to shush her. “You have to understand, dear. They’re angry.”
I’m curious as to what they’re saying that compels people to speak up. Since the world isn’t exactly a fabulous hairy-pitted feminist Wymin’s World gyntopia I’m guessing you’d have to be saying something pretty gross to get called out publicly.
This is the first time I’ve read an MRA comment that’s supposed to be from a female commenter and never doubted that it was.
Women who kiss up to MRA types are just like all other misogynist women: they’re so goddamn desperate for male attention and validation, they’re willing to do anything–including trashing their own gender–to get it. Unfortunately there will always be women out there who swoon when they hear “You’re not like those other women…”
Being a novelty is fun and validating…if you’re into that sort of thing.
Do people actually talk in toilets? Even female toilets (in contrast to the stereotype)? The only things I’ve ever heard in the toilets are “That one’s out of bog roll”, “Sorry!” or “You go first, I’m not desperate.”
… Unless these guys are organising meetups in public loos? O.o
Can’t they make some sort of adorable ramshackle clubhouse? And I demand that they all sport freckles and cowlicks.
Oh look, massive downvotes on the ShitRedditsays page. Something tells me the MRM has been there.
“Policing” = “failing to fawningly agree with.”
If a safe space is one in which everyone agrees with everything I say, then I’ve never been in a safe space and I wouldn’t want to be.
It’s totally true. My magina friends march into those bathrooms and slam the heads of any others bitching about ladies into the wall.
There are no male viewpoint-only spaces? I take it she’s never heard of a men’s club. Or a hell of a lot of Grand Lodges in Freemasonry.
I went to a college where the majority of students were women, but we only had one all-women’s dorm. At the end of every semester, we would receieve a bill for list of times when people had broken a window or scribbled graffiti on the wall (as drunken college kids are wont to do) that all the students in that dorm had to chip in and pay. And every year, the list looked like this:
Dorm A $15.00
Dorm B $10.00
Dorm C-E $8.00
Women’s dorm: $0.00
Actually, SRS is ding some sort of reverse voting thing, in which downvotes are upvotes. They have an explanation in the sidebar. Those wacky kids!
Oohhh, ok. Thanks, I missed that.
I agree with everything you say.
at my school there’s a Title IX police officer stationed in each restroom to enforce compliance with the feminist agenda
BLASTT
Lauralot: “There are no male viewpoint-only spaces? I take it she’s never heard of a men’s club. Or a hell of a lot of Grand Lodges in Freemasonry.”
Or the Catholic Church
or the U.S. government
or the business world
or the women’s fashion industry
or Hollywood
or the advertising industry
or Reddit.
I’d really love to know what “male perspective” is meant to entail in this context. Because as a man whose perspective is decidedly pro-feminist, I can tell you that some of those “male-only spaces” ain’t so fuckin’ safe.
My school doesn’t even have men’s bathrooms anymore. When the concern was raised that having men’s bathrooms creates a male safe space, everyone agreed it was unacceptable. Men are now required to hold it, or find a convenient tree.
40% of the male student population dropped out when it was -30 a few weeks ago.
“I can tell you that some of those “male-only spaces” ain’t so fuckin’ safe.”
Like the YMCA?
Nah, I actually heard it’s fun to stay there.
Is there some kind of Mr. Manner’s Guide to Public Bathroom Etiquette that we don’t know about?
If so, I haven’t been informed.
“There are no male viewpoint-only spaces? I take it she’s never heard of a men’s club. Or a hell of a lot of Grand Lodges in Freemasonry.”
Are these still a thing? I’m genuinely curious about that. I just associate them so much with the 1950’s, and the Flintstones. I didn’t realize they still existed.
If there’s not a neutral or family restroom, I just use the men’s room (it’s just easier that way) and really nobody talks in there. Certainly they don’t have debates. The only large, 100% female groups I’ve ever been in were at screenings of the Twilight series. Not much talking in there, either, although I did hear someone chuckle when Victoria got her head punched off. MISVAMPIRITY!
LOL Girlwriteswhat has been Futrelleboobed
I’m not sure about men’s clubs, but there’s a lodge in my hometown and I know they don’t admit women.
My school has men’s, women’s, and unisex single-stall bathrooms.
The unisex ones are helpful for disabled people, trans and genderqueer people, and parents with little kids–three groups that could actually gripe about public restrooms being unsafe places.
But I suppose since they’re single-user you could also complain about women in them. Nobody at all would “police” you.
YAY SAFE SPACES
GWW has more courage than everyone on this board put together.
GWW endured unspeakable horrors and emerged with the integrity and honesty to see feminist injustice for what it is. It is remarkable in the extreme that she champions men’s rights.
Even fidelbogen said “No need to be coy roy just do it” when speaking of making more mens clubs.
It seems like a lot of whining but no action taken and even if feminists did make it more difficult to start another mens clubs than you can simply hit them with a law suit and win.
walking in to the wrong bathroom is not, as it turns out, much of a horror at all.
My school polices male-viewpoint-only talk in the single-user bathrooms using special sensors we forced male scientists (because technology = men) to create for us.
If writing bullshit on the internet is some act of heroism, Zarat, you must be the most courageous motherfucker on Earth.
How’s the VR wife replacement technology going?
My school’s cafe has two bathrooms, but they’re both gender-neutral. The trans group is campaigning to have gender-neutral bathrooms in every building on campus.
Also, I’ve talked to strangers in bathrooms before. Mostly during musicals, because the lines for the bathroom during intermission are really fucking long, and because you have several topics of mutually interesting conversation (the show you’re seeing, how many times you’ve seen the show you’re seeing, which actors played the characters better, whether you’ve been in the show you’re seeing, other shows you’ve seen, whether the actors in this show were better in other shows, which shows the other person should see, which shows ought ot have revivals already, the people you’ve met stage-door-ing…). It’s a nice place for single-serving friends.
It is remarkable in the extreme that she champions Men’s Rights Activists. FTFY.
I’ve also gone to dudes’ bathrooms before…
VR women more like VR Troopers
The unspeakable horror….of having the same rights as men.
@Sharculese
Last week GWW wrote a length justification for her political point of view:
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/why-i-advocate-for-mens-rights/
You don’t know what you are talking about.
Does anyone know what AntZ is referring to re: GirlWritesWhat’s history? I feel uncomfortable with us making light of it without knowing what it is.
Zarat: “GWW endured unspeakable horrors and emerged with the integrity and honesty to see feminist injustice for what it is. It is remarkable in the extreme that she champions men’s rights.”
What’s remarkable to me is that she considers herself an MRM even after acknowledging the amount of misogyny in the MRN and horrible things they say about rape.
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/why-i-advocate-for-mens-rights/
“It gets tiresome. It gets disheartening. It gets burdensome. It even gets a little scary sometimes, when I realize just how angry some of these men are”
“I believe feminism’s elevation of rape-victim status to a bizarre combination of almost religious idolatry and kid-glove handling harms women in very insidious ways. But at the same time, the way some in the MRM talk about rape…well, it upsets me”
But I’m having a hard time believing it upsets her that much when she continues to associate herself with Paul “I would acquit an accused rapist even in the face of overwhelming evidence that the guy did it” Elam. If she really cares about men’s issues at all, she’d stay far from nutjobs like him.
Okay, I read that. She has my full sympathy regarding what she’s gone through, I still don’t see why she’s in the MRM, and why she made as astoundingly stupid a statement as the one David quoted.
caught me. not knowing the origin story of every whiny paranoid loser on the internet is my secret shame.
having read her story, i’ll change it to being gullible and bad with words is not a horror either. who would have known?
I have a lot of sympathy for her, after reading that article, and I admire her for being able to admit the injustice of a situation even though it benefits her. I still think that sentence she wrote above was kinda stupid. :)
Many people have endured unspeakable horrors. Enduring and surviving, while admirable, does not make their future positions correct. GWW seems unable to acknowledge the significance of the misogyny she herself has experienced in the MRM.
OK, having read her story, I’ll stand by my earlier thoughts about the only girl in the clubhouse. She pretty much said she’s one of those “I’ve always been friends with men because they understand me and women are catty” types. Those women are a huge red flag for me. YMMV.
Oh snap! Girls write what caught me kicking ass cause the boys were speaking out against feminism! Then I sent my brother in to scold them for shameful behavior. What? Seriously….
I think I read her history, but I’m not certain… If I’m thinking of the same person Zarat is, then yes, she went through hell and advocates for men. Think I’ll check it out…
AntZ, it’s very sad that GWW had a rough life. However, that doesn’t mean that she was right when she said there are no places for men besides men’s restrooms. What if she said 2+2=8? Would you say that her personal history makes that true, or would you admit she made an incorrect statement? Cloudiah was right that a lot of people have survived terrible things in life. They don’t get a free pass to say whatever they want without criticism, though.
@Hellkell you should also note that she has also had bad experiences with men as well.
I would say that she would basically be a complete misanthrope since i have bad social experiences with both men and women.
I just don’t trust either of them.
@ozymandias42
“I admire her for being able to admit the injustice of a situation even though it benefits her.”
I don’t think that I would ever be able to champion women’s rights, if women’s rights were independent of men’s rights. Even now, I find it difficult to actually “feel” the pain of women who are wounded by “presumption of nurturer”.
Intellectually, I know that the bigotry that fathers experience in family court cuts both ways. Women find it very difficult to compete at the very highest levels of achievement in business, science, and politics because of the expectation that they are nurturers. For example, women who pursue public office have to come up with a “cover story” explaining why their children will not be neglected.
Ultimately, GWW is probably just a better person than me. I am OK with that, because she is also soooo much better than anyone on the boobz brigade.
” “I’ve always been friends with men because they understand me and women are catty” types. Those women are a huge red flag for me. YMMV.”
Enormous red flag.
Hmm… left out of the story at the good men project was whether or not her ex contested the kids being moved away. If he didn’t contest it despite being given a chance then I could see the judge making a quick decision as to why the previous agreement could no longer be kept and moving on.
If he had contested it he’d have had to stand up and face down the facts that she presented (assuming that her facts stand up, which I am currently for lack of other information) about his visitation patterns and his care and treatment of the three kids. With a move of 2000 miles I’d think a decision would be made by a judge to grant one or the other parent custody, so he’d also have to demonstrate that he was in a position to support three children, etc.
And even if he was an emotional abuser, I’ve seen situations where once someone is out of the abuser’s “home turf” the abuser isn’t willing to pursue because of the uncertain results. Better to think that you’ve LET someone get away than try to get them back and be beaten when you over reach…
So while i wasn’t there and ianal, I can think of a few ways to interpret her story to make it a less dispicable act on the part of the judge to award custody to the current custodial parent who moved to make a better life for her kids.
She’s still wrong about a lot of things. When I messaged her a few weeks ago on Youtube, not only did she stand by Elam’s opinion that “Women [in today's society] are not self-sufficient”, she also justified the register-her website and expressed willfull igorance when I pointed out many statements by Elam expresses his desire to fuck shit up and enact public acts of violence. I’m sorry for what she went through but that doesn’t really explain her embracing the MRM . God knows that there are plenty of feminists who have endured just as much horrible treatment–although I’m pretty sure MRAs would tear those women apart, accusing them of lying about their rapes or of bringing it on themselves.
Men are allowed to create male-only spaces. What ISN’T allowed is for those spaces to be:
(1) “places of public accommodation”; or
(2) non-profits (i.e.) subsidized by taxpayers’ money.
“GWW seems unable to acknowledge the significance of the misogyny she herself has experienced in the MRM.”
She understands it, and so do I. There are occasional bad apples, and the MRM is probably overdue for some housekeeping work.
What is your point? That men and boys do not deserve equal protection under the law because some of the people who advocate for men and boys are too angry to be objective?
GWW is fighting for justice. She is not looking for friends or validation. That only adds to her merit.
^ My comment was directed at Zarat